tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3547054140863278182024-03-06T01:37:48.986-06:00The Life of Cartoonist KorianderWrestling, cartooning, Sailormoon, ancient computers, and bizarre peoples.
Welcome to the madcap world of Koriander.Koriander ~ Codename Sailor Earthhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01418462915907400047noreply@blogger.comBlogger69125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-354705414086327818.post-28147144070877408382013-07-23T17:13:00.003-05:002013-07-23T17:13:42.330-05:00Kentucky 2: The Switchblade Clown ~ or why I am NEVER taking Greyhound again!!!Now on paper, I had a plan that looked pretty solid.<br />1. Go to the Greyhound station.<br />2. Get on a bus.<br />3. Go to Kentucky.<br />4. Go to job interview.<br />
Sounds pretty damn easy, right?<br />
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..... Yeah, if you've been following me to this point, then we all KNOW better, don't we?<br />
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What should have been ONE ticket straight down to London ~ which would have been only a 6-7 hour trip at the very most ~ was split into TWO tickets. Why? Because Greyhound can't be bothered to plan a route not written by the Family Circus gang, so I wound up being sent on Bus #1 to Ohio, then transferred to Bus #2 to Kentucky.<br />
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A 6-7 hour trip would become a 12+ hour fiasco ~ and that's not even counting the hours prior to said Greyhound station. Bear with me here.<br />
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Now before I left, I had purchased a $20 Tracefone flip-phone, so I could take pictures along the way. However I'm low on minutes, so I used my digital camera to snap photos of my cell phone pictures. Podunk? Yes, but it works. I also kept a notepad with me so I could make sketches to pass the time. However, I wound up sketching the very people I had the great misfortune of meeting during my trip, so please understand that some of this story may be difficult to read/see for some readers. Keep in mind, I am only reciting what happened to me. Being of mixed race heritage, I understand that some of this story may offend some readers, so I would like to extend an apology now for anything that may be offensive to you.<br />
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My boyfriend John sent the money ahead for the Greyhound ticket. My mom paid the thing off, including the $15 "gift" charge since the cardholder was not going along (WTF??) and John agreed to come get me as soon as I hit London.<br />
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Now to get to the Greyhound station from my former house (more on that another time) I had to take a cab to the train station, take a train to a bus, then take the bus to a stretch of Chicago, then walk to the Greyhound. My father wanted to "help" me get to the station points, provided I fit into his "busy schedule" of hanging out with his batshit girlfriend "Maryse" and Masonic Lodge. So he ordered a cab for me at 6:30 in the morning.<br />
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Mama and Orion ended up going in his stead.<br />
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So up and out I was at 6:30 in the morning, after getting less than 5 minutes of sleep from the day before. I'm flying by on fumes right now, so it's a miracle I wasn't biting anybody's head off.<br />
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We take the cab to the train station, where I realize my first blunder of the day... my luggage.<br /><br />
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I've had this Barbie bag for a very long time. It's actually bigger than some of the adult luggage Mama had in the house, so I figured it was the right size to cram full of my clothes and toiletries, and while heavily "little girly" and a bit embarrassing to drag through Greyhound, it does it's job nicely.... except that the handles were built for a three year old.... so while it has wheels, there's no way to extend this heavy-assed bag so that a 5'4 adult could carry it safely. So all through Chicago, there I was, leaning half-way down to street level on one side, trying to drag it from one place to another. I want you to imagine the adult daughter of Curly Sue and Igor, traipsing about, trying to avoid bird shit while carting this thing around.<br />
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We get to the station at 8:30.... my bus doesn't leave until 1:45. Awesomesauce.<br />
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So I sat with my brother as he tried to get the Nintendo Hot Spot to work on his 3DS so we could at least watch Pokemon. It took him an hour and a half to load a 23 minute episode. Why? Because <a href="http://codenamesailorearth.blogspot.com/2013/06/thank-you-for-calling-at.html" target="_blank">Greyhound also has AT&T</a>. Nice. So after trying to load the episode, my mom does what everyone with a phone does, she tried to take a picture of the two of us, since she doesn't know when we'll all be together again.<br />
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Out of nowhere like a ninja, Black Hitler jumps my mom, and gets really close to her face. "YOU CAN'T BE TAKING NO DAMNED CELL PHONE PICTURES UP IN GREYHOUND!! THAT IS AGAINST GREYHOUND POLICY. YOU BEST BE PUTTING THAT PHONE AWAY FO' I TAKE IT FROM YOU!!" My mom looks up confused. "Um... I'm just snapping a photo of my kids. My daughter is leaving. And there's nothing in the photo except my son and daughter. You can't even see the Greyh-" Black Hitler cuts her off. "I SAID no PICTURES!! I see you whip that thang out one more time, I'mma have to ask you to LEAVE!!" </div>
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Had this crazy son of a bitch not been caressing his pistol like an eager and happy wife with her husband's man business, I'd have popped this fool. But seeing as how I am grossly under-armed for a confrontation with the NRA's very own Black Hitler in Chicago, I simply ushered my mother and brother to the seating room... where we sat from 9 until 1:45, across from a man undressing himself and singing to his toes (I am not kidding) addressing each by name, and then near the Greyhound arcade, where a little girl messed up the crane game, and made it scream at us until my bus arrived. I am now convinced that mass shootings are the direct result of hearing crane game machines blasting ice cream truck music at a standard television set volume level of 60.</div>
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At 1:45 my bus arrived. I went through my security screening and balled like a giant baby, not knowing how soon I'd next see my mom and my brother. True, crying embarrasses me, but if you had a family like those two, you'd cry your ass off too.</div>
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I was on the bus exactly 3 seconds (I have a watch) when the ethnic, female equivalent of Austin Powers' Fat Bastard sits in front of me, taking out two whole seats. She pulls out her own Tracefone Flipper, and proceeds to scream as loud as possible in it, to some poor sot at an Enterprise Rent-A-Car.</div>
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"WHAT YOU BE MEANING I GOTS TO HAVE ME A CREDIT OR A DAMN DEBIT CARD? BITCH CAN'T YOU JUST GIVE ME A CAR AN' I BE DRIVIN' IT AN' SHIT??"</div>
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It is this type of language by the way, that would cause Sidney Poitier to put his fist through a wall. I could just feel my civil rights fighting family from Heaven doing a group facepalm with Dr. King ~ and the bus was not even in motion yet!</div>
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As the late Billy Mays would say, BUT WAIT!! There's more!</div>
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Sitting next to me is a ditzy 20-something... with a screaming baby.</div>
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Oh! I get it now. I was BAD, and this is HELL!</div>
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Mommy Dearest leans right into her face and says "ENOUGH!! You are being so selfish right now. You clearly are not even trying to understand MY feelings an' stuff. You need to stop, compose yourself, and stop being a PrimaDonna."</div>
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Obviously, this doesn't work. The baby starts crying. Mumsy ignores her to speak to me ~ the only other 20-something currently on the Hades Express.</div>
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Moron: So liiiiike do you have like kids an' stuff?<br />Me: Nope, no kids yet.<br />Moron: Like Ohmigawd i totally like envy you right now. Like for serious. She is SUCh a primadonna.<br />Me: Aww no, babies get fussy when they travel. This is a new experience for her.<br />Moron: GAWD like she should be all happy an sh-AT UP ALREADY!! Like I'm talkin' an' stuff! GAWD. I NEVER should have had her. Like if I could go back in time, an' meet myself when I was like about to have sex, I'd like abort her face in front of her before even having like condomless sex and whatever, so like before I even had sex, I wouldn't like get pregnant. I'd just abort her face before making it. </div>
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Keep in mind, I am sincerely pro-choice, and in favor of a woman's right to choose. But hearing this was a little hard for me. Still, I refuse to change my stance on abortion rights.... I just wish this idiot's mother had had one before this moron was born, and then the moron grew up and she had a baby an' tried to abort it's face before it was even conceived an' stuff.</div>
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By the way. It is not scientifically possible to abort a child before it's conceived. I am ashamed of the public school system for not covering this basic, 4th grade knowledge.</div>
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Moron: So liiiiiiiike how far does this bus like go an' stuff?<br />Me: Well this bus makes a transfer in Cincinnati.<br />Moron: Cincinnati? Like OhMiGawd! Is that like far away an' stuff?<br />Me: Um... Yeah.. it's like two states away an' stuff.<br />Moron: States? ........................ Is that like more than a county or what?</div>
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She has bred, ladies and gentlemen. This one has bred.</div>
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The baby starts crying again, after flipping out of the adult seat and smashing her little head into her mother's bag. Why? Because fuck child seats and seat belts. That's why. Nuno, that's fine Ms. 20-something, you go right ahead and seat your baby in an adult seat without proper restraint, that's totally okay. Brain damage builds character.</div>
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Just as the baby is being brought back up for air, I look to the front of the bus. I'm somewhere past Merrilville, and I see a McDonald's built in the middle of the highway. I shit you not. I did not realize right away that the highway goes around the french fry establishment, so all I saw were the golden arches coming at the bus super fast. Now call me morbid if you will, but at this point, I thought "Gee, isn't this the most podunk, redneck way to die? On a Greyhound that plows entrance way first into a McDonald's. Now how am I going to explain this when I meet St. Peter? Everyone ahead of me will have died for other reasons. Of cancer surrounded by loved ones, in a far away country in battle, Hell, some may even be rendered lifeless after saving a family of kindergarten nuns and puppies from a chainsaw wielding lumberjack in a pillow factory on fire. But me? My death certificate will read *Death by 'Merica*. How could I explain that? What would my mother think, knowing that I was out of her care a grand total of 2 hours, and was killed savagely, and found with the quarter pounder menu jammed in my face?"</div>
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OH THANK YOU SWEET BABY JEBUS ON A TRYCYCLE!!! I went to the right of it, and only skidded ONE barrier. Nothing like a lunchtime coronary to pep you up!</div>
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So I rode through Indiana, knowing that we would be making a stop soon. My ticket actually said that there would be two meals on the bus before hitting Ohio. Anybody who has ever rode Greyhound before knows that this is a lie. There are no stewardesses on board to grant you a shitty, $8 bag of peanuts like they have on airplanes. So where is the magic food coming from?</div>
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As the bus driver says: MAC-DONALDS, which is also a Greyhound bus stop for passengers in the middle of bumfuck Indiana.</div>
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We were told we could have 10 minutes to get off the bus and grab a bite to eat, but at minute #5 we were setting out again. Needless to say I was not stupid enough to leave the bus for ANY reason. Not even to pee. I could just use the toilet in the back of the bus, and let the vortex of ice cold air from the gravel filled road work as a dry bidet for me.</div>
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Now the baby adjacent to me started crying again about 30 minutes later. Her moron of a mother gets nose-to-nose in her face and says the following:</div>
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"You are So not grateful! You know what your problem is? You totally do not understand my problems at all. AT ALL!! You need to stop being a primadonna right now. You know? Other people have to be in Somalia right now. Think about that a minute. You could be in Somalia right now.. with people in it."</div>
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If you watch Saturday Night Live, then you probably figured out that this really IS the girl you regret talking to at a party..... but with a baby. </div>
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Now the baby starts to get sick. So what am I sitting next to? That's right! A screaming, PUKING, crying baby ~ for the next two hours and fifteen minutes. (I have a watch.) So what does her mother give her? A toy? A Playtex full of milk or water? A story? Nope. How about TWO ADULT SERVINGS OF GATORADE!! The Pediatric's choice beverage for Greyhound babies. That'll stop the baby from crying!</div>
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Oh goody! And she's trying to cut her first tooth on the bottle!! So now I have a screaming, neon-blue-and-green-liquid-puking, crying, TEETHING, over-tired baby next to me. YIPPIE!!! And me without a taser.</div>
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At 7:15, we roll into a station in Indianapolis... where I am promptly thrown off the bus, and have my pink bag chucked full force at my head. What the fuck?? Someone hands me a ticket, and I am left stranded in Indy. Did the bus need refueling? Nope. Did we change buses? Nope. Did we change drivers? Nope. We're just out here... because fuck you. I'm not kidding, that's what we were told. But fortunately, TMZ's mom of the year has reached her destination, so maybe the pounding in my head will stop.</div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi5sOpS-tMb0xXGvQM-mp65JRiqa2cRygAAalIDvnfjfq9unhLBha3TBQb65K6a847_b4lbIByaLf4moM_SNE4vpaXb-fOpT9ILmYUt24eNriuf9qV8sKdCZ8cYTJHps_kG1BOy-H-AEZlI/s1600/WelcomeToLondon+078.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="181" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi5sOpS-tMb0xXGvQM-mp65JRiqa2cRygAAalIDvnfjfq9unhLBha3TBQb65K6a847_b4lbIByaLf4moM_SNE4vpaXb-fOpT9ILmYUt24eNriuf9qV8sKdCZ8cYTJHps_kG1BOy-H-AEZlI/s320/WelcomeToLondon+078.JPG" width="320" /></a>My last meal was at 8:30 this morning. It is now 7:15 at night, time to rustle up some grub.<br /><br />I check my wallet and realize I need to break a $10 if I'm going to use the vending machines. So I head on over to a counter with a Jamaican lady behind it. She has absolutely NO interest whatsoever in me purchasing her wares, so I have all the time in the world to gaze at her collection of beauty store jewelry, Half-sewn teddy bears, $7 a slice mini-pizza-slices the size of a Ritz cracker, and bootleg WCW rip-off figures ~ complete with chipping Chinese paint and breakable title belt.</div>
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Finally, I decide to spend $2.15 on an Ice Mountain. I point out what I want and hand over the $10.<br />She hands me a tiny can of Mountain Dew and tries to charge me an extra $1.75 for it.<br />This is NOT okay. I demand my money back and the water. NOW.<br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhZJwnaheFb3cUz4u-JozOrJpC0Dc8-YJikAXkR8clmPX4S7r8pR2qi8iKNOWLPwr74cH6nRIWf-Dn91fkJMSKlvqDxTTZ1bzZC72ombBRX0OYKRbnzvAoY3l6AsHoKHsQgrMAYDkSD37Vs/s1600/BlogCartoonZ8.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhZJwnaheFb3cUz4u-JozOrJpC0Dc8-YJikAXkR8clmPX4S7r8pR2qi8iKNOWLPwr74cH6nRIWf-Dn91fkJMSKlvqDxTTZ1bzZC72ombBRX0OYKRbnzvAoY3l6AsHoKHsQgrMAYDkSD37Vs/s320/BlogCartoonZ8.jpg" width="268" /></a><br />"What do joo mean you no want Mountain Dew? It is the same it IS the same! I know what joo want, joo want de soda pop!"<br /><br />"I want NO such thing! You march over there, get me my water and give me back my money, NOW!!"<br /><br />"What joo problem? It is de same, it is de SAME!!!"<br /><br />Suddenly, a gorgeous Ebony Magazine model pops up behind me. "Excuse me, but the little lady purchased her Ice Mountain water. I heard the whole thing. Please do what's right and give her what she needs."</div>
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The woman behind the counter roughly hands me back my change and my water. "Greedy American! Joo want somting for noting. Greedy greedy."</div>
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I smile a thank you to the other lady as I put my wallet away. The model looks to the woman behind the counter. "May I please have some ice for my drink?"</div>
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"It is a dollar per ice cube. You give me dollar, you give dollar NOW!!"</div>
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"Um... the other station didn't charge me for ice. What's going on here?"</div>
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"No such ting, you LIE, Bitch you give me dollar now."</div>
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Have you ever felt your skin tingle, just before lighting is about to strike? My hair stood up slowly, as I could feel this charming, eloquent lady beside me, suddenly channel her inner street soldier.</div>
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"EXCUSE ME? BITCH WHAT THE FUCK IS YO DAMN PROBLEM??? DON'T MAKE ME CUT A DAMN BITCH FO SOME MUTHAFUCKIN ICE NAW!!"</div>
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I grabbed my luggage and skedaddled to the vending machine, just as a 4'6 Chinese man tippie-toed out from behind the counter. "YOU GO NOW!! YOU NO PAYING BITCH! LEAVE NOW!!" </div>
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"AW <b><u><span style="font-size: x-large;">HELL</span></u></b> NAW!!"</div>
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I found myself hiding behind the Coke machine until security came to claim the two workers.</div>
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8:30 we finally start boarding for Ohio. Sometime after 10, I rolled into Cincinnati.</div>
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Now Cincinnati will fool you. When we first rolled in, this city looked amazing. Freshly painted buildings, new light fixtures, and clean streets. I didn't see even ONE piece of garbage anywhere. This city looked absolutely lovely...... and then I saw the people.</div>
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The first person I saw was a man with what I thought was an art deco lamp. It had an oval on the bottom, and a circle near the top, and was bright red. I thought "Wow! What an interesting lamp." .. And then he lit the bottom on fire and inhaled whatever smoke came out the top of it.</div>
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I saw another dude with a crack pipe (Thank you D.A.R.E. for your coloring book when I was 7) and then I saw a hooker.</div>
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She had a dress that stopped before her lady bits, so her va-jay-jay was out for God and everyone to see. She had a fanny pack with a living, screaming, newborn baby inside, strapped to her hip. Her earrings ran past the boob line, and her hair looked like plastic. She angrily chased after a young man, screaming "I KNOW you WANTZ sum o DIS right here!!" pointing to her crotch. This made the baby cry. So, she slapped the baby and yelled "SHUT UP!! Mama be workin'."</div>
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I saw a few more hookers, each with shiny, sparkly and far too short dresses, and then a pimp in full regalia. Fur trim on the suit, large hat, sunglasses after 10 at night, gold chains, jewelry, a cane, and LIGHT UP platform shoes with goldfish swimming about. I seriously wish I had filmed this. But before I had the chance to pull out my camera, I saw the most terrifying sight I could have possibly seen... the Switchblade Clown.<br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhOMMprX2hSk_-nz0WhjbSLy75e1y71mFP5j7xbl2_zTE-EZIsgdgKA9ou9ZT6_dds4diR9jJQpX_HUB4hQ7l0BnDn3DLtUwFaWhxzTTpSfc-PvADkjpAJUo2DDwoYG4KpYSxpvPBvTCQXP/s1600/BlogCartoonZ10.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhOMMprX2hSk_-nz0WhjbSLy75e1y71mFP5j7xbl2_zTE-EZIsgdgKA9ou9ZT6_dds4diR9jJQpX_HUB4hQ7l0BnDn3DLtUwFaWhxzTTpSfc-PvADkjpAJUo2DDwoYG4KpYSxpvPBvTCQXP/s320/BlogCartoonZ10.jpg" width="165" /></a><br />Over six feet tall, red and orange spotted hair, wife-beater with paint splatters on it, cargo pants, gold hoop earrings on the right ear, red clown nose and shoes, clown makeup, and a switchblade, that he kept loudly flipping. He started to follow my bus, glaring at it like it personally insulted his Mama.</div>
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All of a sudden, I hear *BLAMBLAMBLAMBLAMBLAM!!* the bus makes a sharp turn, knocking everyone out of their seats. The bus screeches into the station, and we are all hurried outside. Once again, my luggage is hurled at my head, and we are huddled under a TV set inside, and told to keep quiet.</div>
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10 minutes later, whatever documentary we were all watching is interrupted. </div>
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"Breaking news! Man shot to death two blocks from Greyhound Station right here in Cincinnati!"</div>
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I look outside and see cop cars and news crews jamming up the roads. There is gunfire everywhere and sirens blaring. A little old lady sitting beside me looks up at the gruesome scene on TV and says:</div>
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"Oh is THAT all? Gee, and here I thought something went wrong with the bus! Oh you silly Cincinnatians!"</div>
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Everyone had a good laugh, and acted like nothing happened.<br /></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgZJr5sBOyhOVPUDlprImyzQhjs5M4Itbb8k1mmZSxpH7ggXPmA2tXwzc3RXb3deUP_5pOtJLDMnwPmgu_RdunCdWYKlHx5tDmkWhueoSeKPEmIllM4KJ-Wg3XJ1WUj21KNF82gptjVeGWz/s1600/BlogCartoonZ5.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgZJr5sBOyhOVPUDlprImyzQhjs5M4Itbb8k1mmZSxpH7ggXPmA2tXwzc3RXb3deUP_5pOtJLDMnwPmgu_RdunCdWYKlHx5tDmkWhueoSeKPEmIllM4KJ-Wg3XJ1WUj21KNF82gptjVeGWz/s320/BlogCartoonZ5.jpg" width="246" /></a>The local police and the highway patrol came inside, and the Greyhound people told us to keep our cell phones OFF and to not even say a word to anybody outside of the station, unless they had a badge. They didn't know if we'd have to take statements or not. <br /><br />We ended up not having to say anything to the cops, as these bozos were just happy to walk around us, and stroke their gun holders. They wanted to scare us, but never actually said word one aloud.<br /><br />As we're all waiting for the next bus, the Switchblade Clown stands outside the windows, glaring at me. The cops see him and opt not to do anything. Frightening the little old ladies inside with me is all the job they can handle right now. Fucking wonderful.<br /><br />The clown starts pacing back and forth outside, by the window, flipping the switchblade every few seconds, as loud as possible. The door is open a wee bit, but he decides not to step in. So instead, he locks his eyes on me, flipping the blade.</div>
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*SHINK* ......................... *SHINK* .............. *SHINK* .............. *SHINK*..................</div>
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I was only supposed to be there ten minutes at the most, then head out to Kentucky.</div>
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... I was there for two hours and forty five minutes.</div>
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I have a watch.</div>
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As we're sitting in the spot designated for those heading to Kentucky, I realize that my bus will be full of the elderly and those who are special needs. I talked wrestling with the elderly people, while the special needs ones took turns telling me I reminded them of an old friend someone had back in 1948 who was killed and then reincarnated into a swan. I want to go home, did I just type that?</div>
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*SHINK* ......................... *SHINK* .............. *SHINK* .............. *SHINK*..................</div>
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I guess the Switchblade Clown didn't have a home to go to, because he spent the entire duration pacing back and forth, while I got to hear the life story of the entire medic unit of 1948.</div>
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Finally at 12:45, we are told to line up, as the new driver stands in front of the line.</div>
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"Alright ALRIGHT PEOPLE NOW LISTEN UP!! I am only taking passengers 1-10. Anybody got a ticket 1-10? Line up lemme see those 1-10's naw!"</div>
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Now here I spot another SNAFU. We all compare our tickets and realize that NONE of us are numbered 1-10 AT FUCKING ALL!! Mine was ticket #11, everyone else had #20 and beyond. So now we know that the people in charge of Greyhound tickets CAN'T FUCKING COUNT, and what does it matter what the damn ticket says anyway? IT'S A BUS!!! YOU SIT WHERE EVER YOU FUCKING WANT TO!!! <br /><br />But this guy is threatening to leave us all behind, and the Switchblade Clown won't stop staring at me. Slowly, he taps his nose.<br /><br />*ERR-EE! .......... Errrrrrrrrrrrrr eeeeeeeeeeeeeeee*<br /><br />*SHINK* ......................... *SHINK* .............. *SHINK* .............. *SHINK*..................<br /><br />I wanna go home now!!</div>
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So I make it crystal clear to the asswipe driver that he WILL be taking the lot of us, NOW. I explain the mess with the ticket numbers, and finally, we're on board.</div>
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The driver slams the door shut, just as the Switchblade Clown was glaring at the luggage spot. The driver clears his throat.</div>
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"May I have yo attention PLEASE? I be yo' driver fo this evening. Our first stop will be in London, Kentucky, we should be arriving at 2:45 eastern time. If you have ANy questions, please step up to the glass and holla at me and we can sort this thang out."<br /><br />He then gets in my face as I'm <b>turning <u>OFF</u></b> my cell phone.</div>
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"And If I see ANY cell phone light offa that DAMN thang I'mma throw yo' ass OFF this bus, you GOT me??"</div>
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Well fuck you too.</div>
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The Switchblade Clown gets into a small car, and tails us for a while, occasionally riding beside the window I'm seated at, driving with one hand and flipping the blade with the other.</div>
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*SHINK* ......................... *SHINK* .............. *SHINK* .............. *SHINK*..................</div>
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If that doesn't put the fear of God into you, nothing will. Ever.</div>
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Suddenly the lights inside the Raggedy Bitch express go off. Now I am in the dark, riding alongside the Switchblade Clown, in a bus full of elderly and special needs people. I may not be a religious person, but prayer was had that evening.</div>
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The Switchblade Clown didn't stop riding alongside the bust until I was halfway through Lexington ~ a city that believes in turning off ALL the lights on the highway after 9 pm.</div>
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Lexington is where something must have gone wrong, or dare I say...... STUPID!!</div>
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Now the bus driver is an asshole dejour. The bus is ice cold, so several of the people on board took turns asking him very kindly, to turn the a/c down a little bit.</div>
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What does he do? </div>
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Ignores them, and makes it colder.</div>
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Now like I said, I am on a bus filled with elderly and special needs people. NONE of these people cops a clue, that asking him to turn the a/c down will actually work.</div>
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"Excuse me Mr. Bus Driver, can you please turn the a/c down a bit?"</div>
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*FREEEEEEEEEEZE*</div>
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"Excuse me sir, but my medication needs to be at room temperature. Can you please turn down the a/c?"</div>
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*FREEEEEEEEEEEZE*</div>
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This continues, as I notice that we have hit the SAME sign for Lexington about three times already. All of them have the same number and the same destination, Lexington.</div>
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I check my cell phone. I realize that I am going to be VERY late.</div>
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I tried getting the bus driver's attention. He is NOT talking to me AT ALL. I poked him, spoke loudly, yelled, nothing is working. He's just a glazed donut behind the wheel, as we hit the SAME Lexington sign for a fourth time. I realize that he is going in circles, taking the scenic route ~ IN THE DARK!!</div>
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Now I am really upset. So I did something that I do not recommend, because it is VERY dangerous and could have gotten us all killed.</div>
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I flipped open my cell phone, waived it on the glass, knowing the light would bounce and hit his eyes, and screamed "HEY MAN WHASSUP??" </div>
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He freaked and started screaming at me. I informed him that we were going in circles and demanded to know when we would reach London.</div>
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"Aw. AW SHEET! It'll be anudder hour and a half I guess. Shit."</div>
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"Okay, now that I finally have your attention, can you PLEASE turn the a/c down?"</div>
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*ARCTIC FREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEZE*</div>
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There are people in groups of four and five behind me, huddled onto ONE chair each, trying to keep warm. I am shivering. My teeth are clattering. I am pissed.</div>
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At 3:15 in the morning ~ the driver puts the brights on in the bus, blinding everyone. </div>
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"AIGHT! London, Kentucky coming up RISE AND SHINE. People you is gonna have exactly FIVE minutes to get yo' shit if this is yo LAST destination. If you ain't be fast enough to get OFF or get yo' shit, it ain't my muthafucking problem."</div>
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I stand up, grab a bar and start riding this bus like fucking Tarzan. I am a foot over the white line. I am pissed off and I want to get HOME.</div>
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At 3:49 in the morning, more than an hour past where I should have been let off, I am kicked off the bus at a Shell station.</div>
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...... WHAT???</div>
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People are being hurled from the bus by this asshole, as he is yelling that this is London, Kentucky.</div>
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I march over to the luggage gap as he is being slow with the bags.</div>
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"If I don't be seeing' yo' bags I can't give 'em to you. Sorry but it ain't MY fault if you be LAZY about yo' damn bags." </div>
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I am officially LIVID right now.</div>
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I flip open the cargo door, climb inside, snatch my pink bag, drag it out, and get nose to nose with this asshole, screaming "AS GOD AS MY WITNESS, I AM NEVER RIDING GREYHOUND AGAIN!!"</div>
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I look around the gas station and realize I am seeing NO familiar faces. Panic is setting in.</div>
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I walk inside to ask the worker there if he's seen anybody like John. But the worker speaks precious little English, and sounds like a Malaysian spam bot. "YOU want to buy Clark bar YES??? NO???? YES??? Please respond YES????'</div>
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My phone buzzes. It's John. Our mutual friend Jimmy is with him.</div>
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John: Where are you?</div>
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Me: I'M AT A SHELL STATION!!!</div>
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John:................................. What?</div>
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Me: I AM AT A FUCKING SHELL STATION!!!</div>
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John: What are you doing at a Shell station?</div>
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Me: I DON'T KNOW!! THEY THREW ME OFF THE BUS HERE!! I'M IN LONDON, BUT I DON'T SEE YOU ANYWHERE, I DON'T KNOW WHERE I AM!!</div>
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Some dude behind me: "Missy we're off of exit 38 if it helps.<br />Me: Thank you sir. SOME DUDE BEHIND ME SAYS I'M OFF OF EXIT 38!!<br />Jimmy: Exit 38? That's on the opposite side of where we are!!</div>
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Using his phone, Jimmy factors that the Greyhound station John was told I would be at does not exist. There is no Armar Oil Company station here, just a Shell station. Good job Greyhound for misleading people!</div>
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John: Now honey calm down, we're coming to get you. Where are you standing? Is the place lit?</div>
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Me: I'M UNDERNEATH SHELL PUMP NUMBER THREE!! I'M WEARING A SUPER MARIO T-SHIRT, I HAVE A PINK BAG WITH BARBIE ON THE SIDE, AND THERE IS AN INSECT NEXT TO ME THE SIZE OF A SMALL POKEMON!! THERE IS AN ANGRY MOB SIX FEET AWAY, CLUBBING A GREYHOUND BUS WITH SHOES AND HAMMERS!!</div>
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Which is the truth. The able-bodied elderly folk at this point had brought out their hammers, and were beating the bus, screaming "You somBITCH does this look like the Armar Oil company to YOU?? It's damn near four in the morning, I have work at FIVE numbnuts!!!" while the bus driver had locked himself back inside the bus, screaming.</div>
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Finally, just as the men folk were trying to tip the bus over, John and Jimmy pull up. I race over to the car, thankful to finally see some familiar faces. I plop down beside John and scream "I'M ALIIIIVE!!!" as I am rushed inside to avoid the villagers with sandals.</div>
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Upon pulling into the driveway, I tried telling the two about nearly being shot. This is where we played a game called "Guess the most dangerous place Kori has been to today". </div>
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Jimmy: Was it Chicago?<br />Me: nope:<br />Jimmy: Dammit.<br />John: It was Gary, right?<br />Me: Shockingly no.<br />John: Shit!<br />Jimmy: Didja hit Detroit? The Greyhound people said you might have.<br />Me: Nope. Didn't go that far north.<br />John: Was it Indy?<br />Me: Nope. Good guess though.<br />Jimmy: Cleveland?<br />Me: Close!<br />Both: Well?<br />Me: Cincinnati.<br />Both: D'AWWWWWWWWWWW!!!!! So close!!</div>
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After I called my mom and told her I made it, John gave me a "Thank God you're Safe" kiss, and held me tight. I was finally safe, far away from the moronic Gatorade mom, the nasty Greyhound people, and far far away from the Switchblade Clown.</div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEirRqchoVZE_V3E2atGQpKuu1RGh2yGolkAx-CKoIrR8egRNPyvDy_UzOAGVdUFDsQupU9a6aLdUvfFYkEDb_hyphenhyphenyZ5cU4n8qovdHlL6YD5NhTqJKa9S3Mfa94JQVmHBXFwEFlV-eTRLA1px/s1600/MyJohnAndMe.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEirRqchoVZE_V3E2atGQpKuu1RGh2yGolkAx-CKoIrR8egRNPyvDy_UzOAGVdUFDsQupU9a6aLdUvfFYkEDb_hyphenhyphenyZ5cU4n8qovdHlL6YD5NhTqJKa9S3Mfa94JQVmHBXFwEFlV-eTRLA1px/s320/MyJohnAndMe.jpg" width="216" /></a></div>
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I'm home.</div>
Koriander ~ Codename Sailor Earthhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01418462915907400047noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-354705414086327818.post-81373338729209029302013-07-23T12:30:00.000-05:002013-07-23T12:30:04.143-05:00Kentucky 1: I can has blessing???<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgoQ6N46c6QRckKsi1TpsDnXK3zrwieU_x4K-9diIBwHh0ak76ZqlBfkEMDo77ubd9cjjx4wmEFkPA_4GcH4sEMvO4D6FSvjRi_8L9jdSlpt8RLXsyLMp0D0s3rvWZNHXBbLC7-haKtvQCq/s1341/ThisIsMeLookingAtUHAULPrices.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><br /></a><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgoQ6N46c6QRckKsi1TpsDnXK3zrwieU_x4K-9diIBwHh0ak76ZqlBfkEMDo77ubd9cjjx4wmEFkPA_4GcH4sEMvO4D6FSvjRi_8L9jdSlpt8RLXsyLMp0D0s3rvWZNHXBbLC7-haKtvQCq/s1341/ThisIsMeLookingAtUHAULPrices.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><br /></a><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgoQ6N46c6QRckKsi1TpsDnXK3zrwieU_x4K-9diIBwHh0ak76ZqlBfkEMDo77ubd9cjjx4wmEFkPA_4GcH4sEMvO4D6FSvjRi_8L9jdSlpt8RLXsyLMp0D0s3rvWZNHXBbLC7-haKtvQCq/s1341/ThisIsMeLookingAtUHAULPrices.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgoQ6N46c6QRckKsi1TpsDnXK3zrwieU_x4K-9diIBwHh0ak76ZqlBfkEMDo77ubd9cjjx4wmEFkPA_4GcH4sEMvO4D6FSvjRi_8L9jdSlpt8RLXsyLMp0D0s3rvWZNHXBbLC7-haKtvQCq/s320/ThisIsMeLookingAtUHAULPrices.jpg" width="280" /></a></div>
This will be a several-part mini series of blogs about the summer of 2013 and what has been going on with me. This post is sentimental, but the next post will be very humorous.<br />
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<br />
You may have noticed that my last few blogs were about AT&T and pop culture. Outside of the AT&T posts, I haven't really talked about my life until right now. So! It's recap time, m'kay?<br />
<br />
So let's go back to May. Right around here, we got the notice that despite negotiations with my parents' lawyer, the house was going to Sheriff's auction anyways. So to summarize:<br />
<br />
1. GSF snookered my parents into a loan in 2007.<br />
2. They told my folks to send payment to Countrywide.<br />
3. They sold the mortgage to CitiBank.<br />
4. Citibank inflated the payment cost, and demanded payment every two weeks instead of monthly.<br />
5. Citibank sold the mortgage to NationStar.<br />
6. NationStar foreclosed between July 2011-June 2013.<br />
7. Fannie Mae now owns my house and want us out ASAP so they can knock it down for the new Wal*Mart.<br />
8. All of these transactions happened WITHOUT my parents knowledge or consent. And if you Google these mortgage companies, you will find several pages worth of this happening to other people. So my story on losing the house isn't even rare or special.<br />
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Right, now imagine my stress level.<br />
<br />
So between items #6-7, my father's father dies.... ranting and raving about how badly he wished my parents' divorce would have gone faster. Yeah, Grandpa died, hating his youngest son's wife and kids and wishing we would leave the family. He really wasn't much of a fan of us. And I was sort of asked not to show up for the funeral. Kinda banned as it was put to me. So um... yeah. Let's move on okay? I don't think I want to deal with this right now.<br />
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Well after Grandpa met his maker, my parents were able to sign off on the divorce. They are now divorced, and both are actually quite happy. In fact, they giggled all the way to the courthouse about it. No nasty fights, no screaming fits over who has what, and I am now a retired referee. :D<br />
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So in planning a move, trying to get a job in time to pay for said move and all of the above, one would need someone to lean on, right?<br />
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...... Well here's where my story takes a beautiful turn. :)<br />
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On New Year's Eve, I blogged about one of my best friends ever, a man named <a href="http://codenamesailorearth.blogspot.com/2012/12/pro-wrestling-freedom-hey-wait-i-know.html" target="_blank">John</a>. My best friend since 2009, and one of the few to have ever heard me cry. He's believed in me when I couldn't even believe in myself.<br />
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One thing I left out of my blog, is that John is the boy next door I never thought I had a chance with.<br />
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I write alot, but when it comes to this sort of thing, I stumble with my words.<br />
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When we first started talking on MySpace, I was timid. I had been BURNED badly when a girlfriend of another friend of mine hacked me, and posed as everybody on my friends list to gain personal data on me, so I was really scared, I didn't even give out my phone number at first! But once I knew that this really <i>was</i> John asking for me, I gave out my number, and soon we were gabbing away about wrestling.<br />
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I was more hot-headed back then than I am now. (Scary thought much?) And very stuck in my ways. There were a few times I almost lost him because of my temper, but he stayed with me, and helped me to see a different way of life.<br />
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I was torn then, I secretly loved John, but I also had feelings for another friend who I never see anymore. I don't want to name names, but let's just say he's on television alot more now then when I last saw him. Strange how bright lights can change people.<br />
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John and I didn't always agree on politics, so I didn't think I had any chance with him. I listened from afar when he was with other women, women I thought he'd marry, since he is so much more than a good catch. He listens, he tries to do the right thing as often as possible. He's far more patient than I am. I never thought I stood a chance with such a gentleman. I've always been told how rough I can be, so I was afraid of hurting him. But we would talk forever, almost every night about wrestling, music, what we were watching, stupid people, and soon, we shared our lives with each other. We compared family notes, and I felt safe confiding in him my darkest hours. Even when my heart was broken by the man I originally loved, John was right there to coax me down from the ceiling. Even at my WORST, he never judged me. Not once.<br />
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*****************************<br />
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My head was on my desk/shelf, just two inches shy of the monitor when the phone rang. I felt like I had been suplexed repeatedly. I was trying as hard as I could to fight back the tears, after my mom told me about there being NOTHING we could do to save the house. My eyes were red from having scanned the entire internet for a solution, and closing my eyes only gave me the Google after-image of 24 search entries. I was babbling HTML code markup in my sleep the night before, and my skin was white with worry.<br />
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I picked up the phone, and confided in John how bad off we were with the house. How being a cartoonist just doesn't pay the bills these days, and about how there were no jobs left in my area. None.<br />
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I took a weary breath, ready to tell him that I couldn't take living like this anymore. I couldn't deal with the constant pressure, the endless phone-calls to the house from the people who screwed my parents out of their home, constantly being told I wasn't good enough ~ even to work at fucking McDonald's. I just didn't want to go on anymore. I took a breath to say this entire paragraph. I was just about ready to s-<br />
<br />
"I love you."<br />
<br />
........................................................................................... I'm sorry, say that again John?<br />
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"I love you, Koriander. I have always loved you."<br />
<br />
............................................................................................<br />
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I was quiet for a few minutes. He gulped, worrying that maybe he crossed a line.<br />
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Wanna know what I was doing?<br />
<br />
Pinching myself.<br />
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I wanted to make absolutely sure that I was not dreaming again.<br />
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That I hadn't lost my mind.<br />
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That I was in reality.<br />
<br />
*pinch*<br />
<br />
OUCH!!<br />
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..................................................................................................................................... Naw for realz and serious I'm NOT dreaming?!?!!?! :D<br />
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I didn't know what to say or where to go with this, I didn't want to screw this up.<br />
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I didn't post about this blossoming relationship until I felt I was emotionally stable enough to do so. I didn't want to wreck it before it had a chance. It's really not every day your best friend says "I love you" like this.<br />
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In this moment, I had been given a reason to keep going, keep on living. I had somebody who needed me as much as I badly need him. I had a clear idea now, I have to go to Kentucky.<br />
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I applied anywhere I could, and finally got a job interview lined up in London. I told John when and where, and we devised a plan. He paid my way, all I had to do was pack a bag or two, and head down to Kentucky.<br />
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My mom was actually ecstatic for me. She and John had also been friends for about as long as I had, so she felt I'd be safe, like I was just heading down to family as opposed to just randomly moving in with someone. John formally asked her for my hand and she was very happy to say yes. And before long, I was heading out the door for the Greyhound....................................................................................<br />
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And on paper, riding the Greyhound seems like a "good" idea. Stay tuned.....Koriander ~ Codename Sailor Earthhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01418462915907400047noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-354705414086327818.post-64717050592756405252013-06-20T00:59:00.001-05:002013-06-20T01:07:48.466-05:00Now how does AT&T respond to my blog?<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi3B43mAOgpxTyewbaxkLod68AwujBGYHWxq4BGmyBsnyin9MdGFTyOht6aaE-vkLpEtO2l9qN-1iapHwJLWknMHRWwqbDwmNJjqwMi_y7oUHe_vnS_WpnO0PP80JRxF5P_7FjKuzyzm2p7/s1600/attmabell.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi3B43mAOgpxTyewbaxkLod68AwujBGYHWxq4BGmyBsnyin9MdGFTyOht6aaE-vkLpEtO2l9qN-1iapHwJLWknMHRWwqbDwmNJjqwMi_y7oUHe_vnS_WpnO0PP80JRxF5P_7FjKuzyzm2p7/s320/attmabell.jpg" width="262" /></a></div>
So two days after <a href="http://codenamesailorearth.blogspot.com/2013/06/thank-you-for-calling-at.html" target="_blank">writing my humorous but sadly, accurate AT&T</a> post, we get a package at the door for a Pace 4111N router.<br />
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We are told that the first problem was that the year-old 2WIRE modem I had before is "Ew. So old" and that 2WIRE products outside of the cheap, plastic stand, are no longer sold by AT&T. They are 2WIRE free.<br />
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To confirm, I actually did go to their website, and sure enough, not even a mention is left on the page.<br />
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What we were NOT told is that the Pace 4111N Router, is made in China by a company without a website (at least not one found by Google) and is... in fact... a 2WIRE.<br />
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AT&T bought out the company initially responsible for 2WIRE products, and have sent the tech specs out to some random place in China, so that new, black 2WIRES can be built, but under different name brands. Isn't that awesome?<br />
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Also, the Pace 4111N that we got is a year old. Had we not gotten a hardship discount for the blown service, it would have been $100. Thankfully ours was free of charge.<br />
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Set the box up and for a few hours, we had slow, then normal internet speed. The box lights keep blinking, and I have no clue if this is normal.<br />
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A dude from AT&T was parked outside. Apparently, someone from AT&T installed "something new" and fiddled with wires they shouldn't have... which blew out phone and internet for 4 blocks worth of people. I can't make that up. What the Hell did you have installed, a NASA station???<br />
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So everything "seemed" fine........................... until I tried to relax by playing on my Nintendo DS Lite.<br />
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........... No connection.<br />
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Error code 51300.<br />
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No WEP key.<br />
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Okay, no problem. Let me type in the WEP key........... and I shit you not, the number 666 is in the title.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEga8WEvSxT8wOrKmorPU8qd5BALt2MAQ_93wEj8BcfkFb2XpuG4W8mRZWxFENkoM8-QNIcKA-2-tmxR6owEh_VauC4jt7no5xZJceqR5PupI5AKsaSF7bk4OrMefor5huZsGg_aEIBwZhzV/s1600/SAM_0606.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="181" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEga8WEvSxT8wOrKmorPU8qd5BALt2MAQ_93wEj8BcfkFb2XpuG4W8mRZWxFENkoM8-QNIcKA-2-tmxR6owEh_VauC4jt7no5xZJceqR5PupI5AKsaSF7bk4OrMefor5huZsGg_aEIBwZhzV/s320/SAM_0606.JPG" width="320" /></a></div>
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Not like THAT'S suspicious or anything.</div>
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So I type in the key and the SSID number. Nothing.</div>
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My brother tries his 3DS, saying that maybe because my DS was used and a series one model, that this is why it can't connect.</div>
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............... Nada.</div>
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This is insane. The Roku and Mama's laptop are picking up just fine. No issues at all. But the handhelds are rejecting the WEP key.</div>
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So I go to Nintendo's support page. My router is nowhere to be found. </div>
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I Google the router.</div>
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There is no manufacturer's website.</div>
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There is no Facebook.</div>
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Instead there are two straight pages of comments on Best Buy, about this thing dropping signal, freezing and taking the computers attached hostage, and not picking up anything ~ I dunno ~ fun, like a Nintendo.</div>
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So I hit up AT&T's website, they have instructions on how to hook up a PS3, PS2, XBOX 360 and the Wii, but that's it. No other video game consoles. Isn't it awesome how they stay up to date?</div>
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10:35 at night, my mom gets a call on her cell phone. I can't believe my ears, it's AT&T. 10:35 at night??? Holy cow, I am amazed. The call is to see if we got the box. My mom explains the issues with the Nintendos.</div>
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The work around?</div>
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1. Open Browser</div>
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2. Enter code</div>
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3. Go through entire modem.</div>
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4. Change everything</div>
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5. Scroll down</div>
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6. Re-write code</div>
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7. Save Changes</div>
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8. Enter new password, change password to WEP key.</div>
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9. Now reconfigure every freaking device in the house, because it will deactivate internet connection.</div>
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10. Keep AT&T number handy in case the phone goes out again. (I want you to read that one out loud.)</div>
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He also said twice that there is NO guarantee that we'd actually get back service for ANY device, but it's something to do.</div>
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Total time according to the 10:35 at night AT&T tech? An hour or so.</div>
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................................................................................... Or I could get a new service.</div>
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EDIT: My mother adds:</div>
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<span style="background-color: #fafbfb; color: #4e5665; font-family: Helvetica, Arial, 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; line-height: 16px;">You forgot to mention that at TWO separate times in the conversation with this tech, he DID mention that IF I choose to do this, AT&T is NOT responsible for my service derping out on a permanent level AND that this has a good percentage of not working at all AND taking out the existing service that we currently juuuuust got back.</span></div>
Koriander ~ Codename Sailor Earthhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01418462915907400047noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-354705414086327818.post-6368023479701436772013-06-18T20:35:00.002-05:002013-06-18T22:34:19.952-05:00America wants dead women, and only live babies so we can have dead soldiers. The Bible is NOT a shield.Some days, I hate that I was born a woman.<br />
<br />
It's no different from being a caged animal.<br />
<br />
Everyone wants to control the body God gave you, but nobody wants to help you when you need them.<br />
<br />
It's evil to be a woman in America. I sin every time I breathe.<br />
<br />
No redemption for a uterus.<br />
<br />
You point out what people do and say, and they call YOU stupid or crazy.<br />
<br />
Pretend that they know better than you, because they don't have your uterus.<br />
<br />
Pretend that not knowing anything about a woman's life or basic science for that matter, makes them Holy.<br />
<br />
"Even rape babies deserve more than YOU" That's what we teach our children to say.<br />
<br />
We teach them that hate = love.<br />
<br />
Until it's their daughter who needs help, it's "fuck you whore" until you die.<br />
<br />
And people tell VIRGINS they're whores now!<br />
<br />
Newborn virgins.<br />
<br />
Everyone hid behind their Bibles and forced your mom to have you, but as soon as you live, you are a welfare whore.<br />
<br />
Why?<br />
<br />
Because Mommy needed Government aid after nobody would hire her.<br />
<br />
Because she decided to give birth to you.<br />
<br />
After we bullied her, and called her a murderer if she even thought about an abortion.<br />
<br />
But now you live.<br />
<br />
But you're on welfare?<br />
<br />
Fuck you, whore.<br />
<br />
We tell babies this now.<br />
*******************************************************************************<br />
I fear for any future daughters, nieces or granddaughters I may have.<br />
<br />
Assuming I don't die trying to birth one.<br />
<br />
I'll try to live for my future children. I do want to see their faces as they grow. Want to hold them, and nurture them, teach them to respect the other gender as if it was their own, so I have no child beating his/her spouse, and knowing only love. I dream of this.<br />
<br />
But I fear if they will live under the oppression I see right now.<br />
<br />
I fear they will be told what my society tells me.<br />
<br />
"Shut up whore. Don't oppress my way of thinking while I'm trying to oppress you."<br />
<br />
I'm scared if my children turn out to be girls.<br />
<br />
I pray they don't see the world I deal with.<br />
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I pray they never know from accidental or forced pregnancies.<br />
<br />
I pray. Who listens?<br />
<br />
Someone ought to, for them, right?<br />
<br />
Maybe that's why I blog. So I can better the world they might have.<br />
<br />
Just a little.<br />
<br />
A woman can imagine, can't she?<br />
<br />
Or is that not allowed?<br />
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A woman has sex, but her lover either didn't use a condom or his protection broke.<br />
<br />
It's her fault.<br />
<br />
What? Are you trying to get a job? Public aid? An abortion or someone to adopt this THING you weren't ready for? Section 8 housing that's bigger than your one bedroom apartment in case you do want to be a mom after all?<br />
<br />
You're a whore.<br />
<br />
Fucking stupid whore. I hope you die.<br />
<br />
Let me Facebook about it.<br />
<br />
What? CHURCH aid? Don't be stupid. The church can't save you now. We can pray, but we'll be too busy talking behind your back to offer support.<br />
<br />
You're a sinner.<br />
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A woman in America gets raped.<br />
<br />
Her attackers generally go free, or have a minimal sentence, while she has hate pages about her on Facebook. "Die Whore" is painted over her picture, and she is told it was her fault.<br />
<br />
"What did you do to get raped? This MUST be YOUR fault", chides the cops.<br />
<br />
She has to PROVE she was attacked, PROVE she wasn't at fault.<br />
<br />
While her attackers make fun of her on Twitter.<br />
<br />
What do we tell her?<br />
<br />
Get over it. Move on. Stop crying.<br />
<br />
A woman becomes pregnant due to rape. We force her to pay for nine months of prenatal care ~ BUT ~ we refuse to help her get a job. Why? Because pregnant women are risks. Nobody wants to be sued if she miscarries.<br />
<br />
So she's jobless.<br />
<br />
She tries to apply for welfare or food stamps?<br />
<br />
♫ Welfare WHORE Welfare WHORE milking the system die die die ♪ sing total strangers on Facebook.<br />
*********************************************************************************<br />
If she gives it up for adoption? She's immature. Can't take care of anything.<br />
If she has an abortion? She's a murderous whore.<br />
<br />
The Government loves to outsource our jobs, so she can't have one.<br />
<br />
Slash her pay, so she earns the same as a modern day slave.<br />
<br />
Kill medical bills and clinics that keep her alive.<br />
<br />
Slash medical research.<br />
<br />
Restrict what she can do in public.<br />
<br />
Nobody cares if she has an ectopic pregnancy.<br />
<br />
Nobody cares if she can't afford nine months of prenatal care or a child.<br />
<br />
Nobody cares if she dies.<br />
<br />
In fact, people love it when she dies. They make pages about it on Facebook, celebrating her death with Clorox coupons.<br />
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Everyone pretends they're doing this for God, ignoring how pro-choice he is in the Bible. (Ask a Canaanite)<br />
<br />
Ignoring passage after passage where he allowed Moses, and many more men to rip open wombs, stab women, and placed curses on whole families for their sins.<br />
<br />
Ignoring the separation of church and state, in the name of someone they don't actually know. A stipulation Jesus actually would like, since he wasn't too big on churches himself.<br />
<br />
No, let's ignore the facts. Woman is the problem. Fuck her.<br />
********************************************************************************<br />
But if she does have a baby? The baby is a welfare whore.<br />
<br />
George Carlin said it best. They want live babies so they can have dead soldiers.<br />
<br />
When these unwanted "whore" babies grow up? We push them into the military.<br />
<br />
We make up reasons for them to die for our "freedom".<br />
<br />
You know, the very thing a woman does not have.<br />
<br />
Freedom.<br />
<br />
Women don't deserve that word.<br />
<br />
Especially not for the body they were born with.<br />
<br />
Fuck her, she was born to be a whore.<br />
<br />
And when we can't fuck her anymore.................<br />
<br />
We turn on our boys.<br />
<br />
Then what?Koriander ~ Codename Sailor Earthhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01418462915907400047noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-354705414086327818.post-7836337582358109862013-06-17T19:20:00.000-05:002013-06-17T19:40:50.435-05:00Thank you for calling AT&T<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhPVThbYd-MFJo405g-FkC6wKcHgm3LCjb2grx4eLsvx1TY74fTZbB_gLLVdySmqCE8KbXzLxHAFwK6wSJWM2zGkaMKRE9H_0n2i-IBkuQp6MsiDzETzXn5kB92uTXpQITMw6xXmQrgzqXY/s1600/BroadbandlinkFAIL.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="186" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhPVThbYd-MFJo405g-FkC6wKcHgm3LCjb2grx4eLsvx1TY74fTZbB_gLLVdySmqCE8KbXzLxHAFwK6wSJWM2zGkaMKRE9H_0n2i-IBkuQp6MsiDzETzXn5kB92uTXpQITMw6xXmQrgzqXY/s400/BroadbandlinkFAIL.jpg" width="400" /></a></div>
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Ever wonder why people go mad? This is why.</div>
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<b><span style="font-size: large;">Call #1:</span></b></div>
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<span style="background-color: white; color: #37404e; font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; line-height: 18px;">Thank you for calling </span><a data-hovercard="/ajax/hovercard/page.php?id=8576093908&extragetparams=%7B%22directed_target_id%22%3A0%7D" href="https://www.facebook.com/ATT?directed_target_id=0" style="background-color: white; color: #3b5998; cursor: pointer; font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; line-height: 18px;">AT&T</a><span style="background-color: white; color: #37404e; font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; line-height: 18px;">. We have detected that you are having a problem. </span></div>
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<span style="background-color: white; color: #37404e; font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; line-height: 18px;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: white; color: #37404e; font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; line-height: 18px;">Yes, I see a problem is what you are having. Now that we have established there is a problem, you should be happy customer now, because I acknowledge that a problem without resolution at all is in your grasp. You have a problem and we see the problem. </span></div>
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<span style="background-color: white; color: #37404e; font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; line-height: 18px;">Thank you and have a good day. *CLICK*</span></div>
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<span style="background-color: white; color: #37404e; font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;"><br /></span></div>
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<b><span style="font-size: large;">Call #2:</span></b></div>
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<span style="background-color: white; color: #37404e; font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; line-height: 18px;">Thank you for calling </span><a data-hovercard="/ajax/hovercard/page.php?id=8576093908&extragetparams=%7B%22directed_target_id%22%3A0%7D" href="https://www.facebook.com/ATT?directed_target_id=0" style="background-color: white; color: #3b5998; cursor: pointer; font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; line-height: 18px; text-decoration: none;">AT&T</a><span style="background-color: white; color: #37404e; font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; line-height: 18px;"> yet again, because in acknowledging that you have a problem, we didn't actually fix it, we just accepted it as part of our U-Verse, which we have a sale on right now.</span></div>
<br style="background-color: white; color: #37404e; font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; line-height: 18px;" />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #37404e; font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; line-height: 18px;">We are experiencing a high volume of calls, all linked with us cutting phonelines in your area, jamming signals and letting our highly trained professionals chew on your broadband links. We will now ask yo</span><span class="text_exposed_show" style="background-color: white; color: #37404e; display: inline; font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; line-height: 18px;">u to check every phone in the house to see if they are off the hook. </span><br />
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<span class="text_exposed_show" style="background-color: white; color: #37404e; display: inline; font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; line-height: 18px;">Of course they are not, and there is nothing wrong with the phones themselves, but at AT&T, we enjoy wasting as much time as possible. </span></div>
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<span class="text_exposed_show" style="background-color: white; color: #37404e; display: inline; font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; line-height: 18px;"><br /></span></div>
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<span class="text_exposed_show" style="background-color: white; color: #37404e; display: inline; font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; line-height: 18px;">We will also tell you to do a Power-Cycle, whereby you turn off the computer, unplug everything, and then plug it all back in. This also won't fix your non-internet-based phoneline, but it gives you something to do while we eat SubWay and fiddle on a copy of computer solitaire from 1995.<br /><br />Thank you for calling your friends at AT&T. Even though you paid your bill before it was due, we will now take the time to tell you how you can pay us double for half the service.</span></div>
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<span class="text_exposed_show" style="background-color: white; color: #37404e; display: inline; font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;"><br /></span></div>
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<span class="text_exposed_show" style="background-color: white; color: #37404e; display: inline; font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; line-height: 18px;"><span style="color: black; font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: large; line-height: normal;"><b>Call #3:</b></span></span></div>
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<span class="text_exposed_show" style="background-color: white; color: #37404e; display: inline; font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; line-height: 18px;">After consulting our staff here at <a data-hovercard="/ajax/hovercard/page.php?id=8576093908&extragetparams=%7B%22directed_target_id%22%3A0%7D" href="https://www.facebook.com/ATT?directed_target_id=0" style="color: #3b5998; cursor: pointer; text-decoration: none;">AT&T</a> we have determined that while you have no phone signal or dial tone, that we will now act as if the problem is all imaginary.<br /><br />However, since you have threatened our misogynistic and racist call center in India with a flight to their main office in Calcutta via Chuck Norris airlines, we will now schedule a tech to come out, poke at the wires, stomp on the sid<span class="text_exposed_show" style="display: inline;">ing of your house and pick his nose while telling you you need a new DSL modem box for your NON-INTERNET phone. </span></span></div>
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<span class="text_exposed_show" style="background-color: white; color: #37404e; display: inline; font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; line-height: 18px;"><span class="text_exposed_show" style="display: inline;"><br /></span></span></div>
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<span class="text_exposed_show" style="background-color: white; color: #37404e; display: inline; font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; line-height: 18px;"><span class="text_exposed_show" style="display: inline;">He will arrive surely and half-awake promptly at 7:30 Thursday evening. </span></span></div>
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<span class="text_exposed_show" style="background-color: white; color: #37404e; display: inline; font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; line-height: 18px;"><span class="text_exposed_show" style="display: inline;"><br /></span></span></div>
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<span class="text_exposed_show" style="background-color: white; color: #37404e; display: inline; font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; line-height: 18px;"><span class="text_exposed_show" style="display: inline;">Yes, we do know it's Monday afternoon, but at AT&T, we are not authorized to actually <i>care</i>.</span></span></div>
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<span class="text_exposed_show" style="background-color: white; color: #37404e; display: inline; font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; line-height: 18px;"><span class="text_exposed_show" style="display: inline;"><br /></span></span></div>
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<span class="text_exposed_show" style="background-color: white; color: #37404e; display: inline; font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; line-height: 18px;"><span class="text_exposed_show" style="display: inline;">Please enjoy not having a landline phone until then. </span></span></div>
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<span class="text_exposed_show" style="background-color: white; color: #37404e; display: inline; font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; line-height: 18px;"><span class="text_exposed_show" style="display: inline;"><br /></span></span></div>
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<span class="text_exposed_show" style="background-color: white; color: #37404e; display: inline; font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; line-height: 18px;"><span class="text_exposed_show" style="display: inline;">Thank you for calling. Before we hang up on you and laugh, we will now send you to an automated message about AT&T U-verse, untraceable-and-a-pain-to-prov<wbr></wbr><span class="word_break" style="display: inline-block;"></span>e-it's-existence-in-court-pape<wbr></wbr><span class="word_break" style="display: inline-block;"></span>rless bills, and a myriad of other products that you couldn't possibly use.</span></span></div>
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<span class="text_exposed_show" style="background-color: white; color: #37404e; display: inline; font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;"><span class="text_exposed_show" style="display: inline;"><br /></span></span></div>
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<span class="text_exposed_show" style="background-color: white; color: #37404e; display: inline; font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; line-height: 18px;"><span class="text_exposed_show" style="display: inline;"><span style="color: black; font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: large; line-height: normal;"><b>Call #4:</b></span></span></span></div>
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<span class="text_exposed_show" style="background-color: white; color: #37404e; display: inline; font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; line-height: 18px;"><span class="text_exposed_show" style="display: inline;">Thank you for calling AT&T again. You likely have noticed that there are 10 AT&T trucks in your area, just zooming around and not actually doing anything, but trying to look important.</span></span></div>
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<span class="text_exposed_show" style="background-color: white; color: #37404e; display: inline; font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; line-height: 18px;"><span class="text_exposed_show" style="display: inline;"><br /></span></span></div>
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<span class="text_exposed_show" style="background-color: white; color: #37404e; display: inline; font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; line-height: 18px;"><span class="text_exposed_show" style="display: inline;">We also know about the 400 lbs. man in front of your home, with the ladder half slanted over the truck, playing with his iPhone and blaring 2Chainz as loud as humanly possible, shattering your windows. He is far too busy picking his ear to actually run up the pole and fix the phone, so right now, his truck is for decoration only.</span></span></div>
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<span class="text_exposed_show" style="background-color: white; color: #37404e; display: inline; font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; line-height: 18px;"><span class="text_exposed_show" style="display: inline;"><br /></span></span></div>
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<span class="text_exposed_show" style="background-color: white; color: #37404e; display: inline; font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; line-height: 18px;"><span class="text_exposed_show" style="display: inline;">Your actual worker is scheduled for Thursday night at 7:30, but may not arrive until 8:15 Friday night due to the high volume of people we have screwed out of phone service.</span></span></div>
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<span class="text_exposed_show" style="background-color: white; color: #37404e; display: inline; font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; line-height: 18px;"><span class="text_exposed_show" style="display: inline;"><br /></span></span></div>
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<span class="text_exposed_show" style="background-color: white; color: #37404e; display: inline; font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; line-height: 18px;"><span class="text_exposed_show" style="display: inline;">Thank you and have a nice day.</span></span></div>
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<span class="text_exposed_show" style="background-color: white; color: #37404e; display: inline; font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; line-height: 18px;"><span class="text_exposed_show" style="display: inline; font-size: x-small;"><br /></span></span></div>
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<span class="text_exposed_show" style="background-color: white; color: #37404e; display: inline; font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; line-height: 18px;"><span class="text_exposed_show" style="display: inline;"><span style="color: black; font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: large; line-height: normal;"><b>Call #5:</b></span></span></span></div>
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<span class="text_exposed_show" style="background-color: white; color: #37404e; display: inline; font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; line-height: 18px;"><span class="text_exposed_show" style="display: inline;">Thank you for calling AT&T! You are likely calling to ask about the four, Java heavy ads we just crammed your Facebook feed with. You have noticed that these ads are the only things loading correctly, while the rest of your Facebook feed says "Broadband Link Not Available" and that these ads are super smarmy, and mostly lead you to items and services that are not available for your area. </span></span></div>
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<span class="text_exposed_show" style="background-color: white; color: #37404e; display: inline; font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; line-height: 18px;"><span class="text_exposed_show" style="display: inline;"><br /></span></span></div>
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<span class="text_exposed_show" style="background-color: white; color: #37404e; display: inline; font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; line-height: 18px;"><span class="text_exposed_show" style="display: inline;">Why the snub? Because we are AT&T. Goodbye! *CLICK*</span></span></div>
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<span class="text_exposed_show" style="background-color: white; color: #37404e; display: inline; font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; line-height: 18px;"><span class="text_exposed_show" style="display: inline;"><span style="color: black; font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: large; line-height: normal;"><b>Call #6:</b></span></span></span></div>
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<span class="text_exposed_show" style="background-color: white; color: #37404e; display: inline; font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; line-height: 18px;"><span class="text_exposed_show" style="display: inline;">Thank you for calling AT&T. </span></span></div>
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<span class="text_exposed_show" style="background-color: white; color: #37404e; display: inline; font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; line-height: 18px;"><span class="text_exposed_show" style="display: inline;"><br /></span></span></div>
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<span class="text_exposed_show" style="background-color: white; color: #37404e; display: inline; font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; line-height: 18px;"><span class="text_exposed_show" style="display: inline;">Judging by the volume with which you screamed into the automated voice system, and by the tone of voice and NC-17 rated dialogue you used when addressing our surely, agitated, underpaid, overworked, disagreeable and misogynistic call manager in the Philippines, informing him that no, he may not speak to the man of the house, because it is the woman who is actually in charge of the bills, and the violent manner you were planning on utilizing when threatening to sodomize him with a Medieval Morning Star coated in hot sauce and habanero juice, that a squirrel sneezed down the street and two blocks over from your house, resulting in the immediate discontinuation of your internet signal, which was your last line of communication. </span></span></div>
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<span class="text_exposed_show" style="background-color: white; color: #37404e; display: inline; font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; line-height: 18px;"><span class="text_exposed_show" style="display: inline;"><br /></span></span></div>
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<span class="text_exposed_show" style="background-color: white; color: #37404e; display: inline; font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; line-height: 18px;"><span class="text_exposed_show" style="display: inline;">We agree that there is a problem with the service, but right now we have opted not to boost the signal or try anything useful. </span></span></div>
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<span class="text_exposed_show" style="background-color: white; color: #37404e; display: inline; font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; line-height: 18px;"><span class="text_exposed_show" style="display: inline;"><br /></span></span></div>
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<span class="text_exposed_show" style="background-color: white; color: #37404e; display: inline; font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; line-height: 18px;"><span class="text_exposed_show" style="display: inline;">Your technician may arrive later than Saturday night. We understand that this is Monday, and we originally told you we would send somebody out Thursday night, but there is a valuable reason why we are not willing to honor our original meeting.</span></span></div>
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<span class="text_exposed_show" style="background-color: white; color: #37404e; display: inline; font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; line-height: 18px;"><span class="text_exposed_show" style="display: inline;"><br /></span></span></div>
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<span class="text_exposed_show" style="background-color: white; color: #37404e; display: inline; font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; line-height: 18px;"><span class="text_exposed_show" style="display: inline;">Because fuck you. That's why.</span></span></div>
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<span class="text_exposed_show" style="background-color: white; color: #37404e; display: inline; font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; line-height: 18px;"><span class="text_exposed_show" style="display: inline;">Thank you for calling your friends at AT&T. *CLICK*</span></span></div>
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<span class="text_exposed_show" style="background-color: white; color: #37404e; display: inline; font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; line-height: 18px;"><span class="text_exposed_show" style="display: inline;"><span style="color: black; font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: large; line-height: normal;"><b>Call #7:</b></span></span></span></div>
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<span class="text_exposed_show" style="background-color: white; color: #37404e; display: inline; font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; line-height: 18px;"><span class="text_exposed_show" style="display: inline;">Thank you for calling AT&T. We see in our records that this is the seventh time you have made it through without being hung up on today, yet this is the 18th time you have called us today over all. </span></span></div>
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<span class="text_exposed_show" style="background-color: white; color: #37404e; display: inline; font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; line-height: 18px;"><span class="text_exposed_show" style="display: inline;"><br /></span></span></div>
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<span class="text_exposed_show" style="background-color: white; color: #37404e; display: inline; font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; line-height: 18px;"><span class="text_exposed_show" style="display: inline;">We also see by our GPS service that a slight, infinitesimal breeze blew past your house, thus knocking out the Wi-Fi. There is no rain scheduled for your area today, and yet our service just blew out like a 120 Watt bulb in a 40 watt capacity lamp from the 1960's.</span></span></div>
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<span class="text_exposed_show" style="background-color: white; color: #37404e; display: inline; font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; line-height: 18px;"><span class="text_exposed_show" style="display: inline;"><br /></span></span></div>
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<span class="text_exposed_show" style="background-color: white; color: #37404e; display: inline; font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; line-height: 18px;"><span class="text_exposed_show" style="display: inline;">Now that we have told you about the GPS system, you have figured out that we are using Apple Maps via the iPhone of one of our call center staffers. </span></span></div>
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<span class="text_exposed_show" style="background-color: white; color: #37404e; display: inline; font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; line-height: 18px;"><span class="text_exposed_show" style="display: inline;"><br /></span></span></div>
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<span class="text_exposed_show" style="background-color: white; color: #37404e; display: inline; font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; line-height: 18px;"><span class="text_exposed_show" style="display: inline;">We advise you to please stop flipping off and mooning the big brother satellite in the sky. You are only providing more entertainment for our interns in the Philippines, who spend their down time off the clock spamming anime-related Facebook groups with the phrase "put a dick inside another dick plz follow bak ♥♥ :(" and posting duck photos of themselves in front of Justin Bieber posters in their mother's bathrooms.</span></span></div>
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<span class="text_exposed_show" style="background-color: white; color: #37404e; display: inline; font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; line-height: 18px;"><span class="text_exposed_show" style="display: inline;"><br /></span></span></div>
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<span class="text_exposed_show" style="background-color: white; color: #37404e; display: inline; font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; line-height: 18px;"><span class="text_exposed_show" style="display: inline;">Upon zooming in closer via our iPhone app, which by the way is running smoothly on our end, we can see that you are legit crying blood. We have established that blood crying is a problem, caused by our service.</span></span></div>
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<span style="color: #37404e; font-family: lucida grande, tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif;"><span style="line-height: 18px;">Thank you for spending an entire work day on the phone with your friends from AT&T. </span></span></div>
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<span style="color: #37404e; font-family: lucida grande, tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif;"><span style="line-height: 18px;">Please hold while we direct you back to the surely, American-hating asswipe who took your US born job. While he is making only five cents per dollar, in his country, he will be able to retire early and buy a mansion, scrubbed daily by the D cup breasts of 112 virgins, because five cents to us is roughly $30 to him. </span></span></div>
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<span style="color: #37404e; font-family: lucida grande, tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif;"><span style="line-height: 18px;">Please refrain from cursing your existence on this planet, while we blare the elevator-swag version of Fergie and the Black Eyed Peas's "My Humps" as done by a caffeinated hipster, who is crying over a MIDI keyboard, because his Emo girlfriend of three months just dumped him for another woman.</span></span></div>
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<span style="color: #37404e; font-family: lucida grande, tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif;"><span style="line-height: 18px;">*My HUMPS.... my humps... My lovely lady LUUUUUUUUUMPS!!! AAaaaaaaaaaaah AHAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHH*</span></span></div>
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<span style="color: #37404e; font-family: lucida grande, tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif;"><span style="line-height: 18px;">Tenk yew for kalling AT&T my name is Malachai. How kan I help yew tudey? Yes I see you have a problem, a problem is what you are having. Thank you and have a nice day. *CLICK*</span></span></div>
Koriander ~ Codename Sailor Earthhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01418462915907400047noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-354705414086327818.post-77264374199713677582013-06-12T11:14:00.003-05:002013-06-12T11:14:34.309-05:00Hey Racists! It's Cheerios, get a life!! Like most of you by now, I've seen the adorable Cheerios ad, featuring the cute bi-racial girl and her White mom and Black dad. I was tickled when I first saw the ad, because the girl looks like my mom did when she was little.<br />
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So with that said, imagine my rage when I saw tons of comments on YouTube against the ad, posted by fully grown adults, calling the ad some of the following:<br />
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1. Evil<br />
2. Against God<br />
3. Horrible<br />
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And don't get me started on the racial slurs the child was called.<br />
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If you've missed out on all the fun, <a href="http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2339956/Being-biracial-family-reality-U-S-father-girl-Cheerios-advert-says-racist-abuse-commercial.html" target="_blank">The Daily Mail</a> has the whole story, including the innocent way the child in question is handling it.<br />
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But this is the final straw. People, like it or not, we can't act stupid anymore. We have to face up to the fact that we have a real, not pretend, race problem in America.<br />
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Stop lying.<br />
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Stop trying to tell people like me that "it's all in my head" or "I've blown this out of proportion". No. Grow up, act your age and face the issue dead on.<br />
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Growing up, I was called many names because I'm multiracial. Here's a list of <i>some</i> of names I heard ~ even from my own flesh and blood:<br />
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1. Pickaninny<br />2. The N word<br />3. High Yella Bitch<br />4. Yellowbone (By the way, Justin Bieber uses that slur in his song "Speaking in Tongues". Look it up.)<br />5. Wannabe (Got this from Black and White bullies as a kid)<br />6. White Trash N*Gga (Got this on YouTube as well)<br />7. Goliwog<br />8. Half Breed (Usually reserved for mulattoes, I'm multi, not just half, thank you)<br />9. Spic (I'm not Hispanic, but I got that one from a janitor at a doctor's office at age 14)<br />10. You people (Still get that one)<br /><br />
Now most of the slurs died down around 2005. I don't really know why, but people just seemed tolerant. And this was good. By 2007 I had put all of this ugly behind me.<br />
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But less than one year into President Obama's first term, they all came back with a vengeance.<br />
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Suddenly, Facebook became overrun with images of college-age boys in Blackface, people pointing fingers at every Black or mixed-race person, blaming ALL of us for why their lives suck.<br />
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Not only was racism a "just get over it you filthy N*gg*r" type of thing, it was being encouraged. Parents now have bumper stickers on their strollers, proclaiming the "fun" of killing or deporting anybody who isn't White. Black kids are taught to holler at kids of a different color, calling White kids such offensive names as Cracker and Honky. And the parents only egg the kids on.<br />
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Why do we allow this? Why are we teaching our kids to hate, just because we have a President of another color? We weren't allowing this when we had a White guy in office, so why start now?<br />
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And please spare me the lame excuse of "Um well It's not because Obama is Black, it's um um... well Ghetto kids are really~" because I'm just going to report you.<br />
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White, Black or anything else, there is no excuse for this.<br />
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There will never be an excuse to call a child a hateful name, or to teach them hate.<br />
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No excuse to hate on an individual because of the color of their skin.<br />
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No excuse to belittle a loving couple for marrying outside of their race.<br />
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And try not to get so cozy behind that Bible, else your hands start to burn. No God would ever want you to post garbage comments on YouTube, against a 6 year old girl, because she was born bi-racial. Let's not forget the "Love Thy Neighbor" comment from the book, and I'm pretty sure one of the commandments God put forth says something against "bearing false witness against your neighbor" so posting on YouTube that the little munchkin is a "whore" is probably breaking that one, oh ye of crooked faith. I'm also sure you shouldn't use His name to post hate against anybody too. That might even be a sin.<br />
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We need to own up to the fact that we have a strong race hate problem that needs to end in this country.<br />
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And stop getting butthurt over cereal. Grow up.Koriander ~ Codename Sailor Earthhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01418462915907400047noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-354705414086327818.post-51958093383556336052013-06-02T06:26:00.000-05:002013-06-02T06:26:44.371-05:00Betty Boop and Miku Hatsune ~ How Virtual Idols capture our hearts<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhSlTaeEjZmS_pnChKK50YQvKdqzlGDCX17bbXvkeabOKL-Jwffa691fNL5Qgq2qKKb9l9SA0a9VGDfMKBjxAnjD7-40gou2NwiVMQctkrRoet8OEJEYkrvq4LFPtedqvh8qGBIUiXVYP26/s1600/BettyAndMiku-Airbrush.png" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhSlTaeEjZmS_pnChKK50YQvKdqzlGDCX17bbXvkeabOKL-Jwffa691fNL5Qgq2qKKb9l9SA0a9VGDfMKBjxAnjD7-40gou2NwiVMQctkrRoet8OEJEYkrvq4LFPtedqvh8qGBIUiXVYP26/s400/BettyAndMiku-Airbrush.png" width="262" /></a></div>
It was just a few short years ago that I first stumbled across a captivating creature known as Miku Hatsune.<br />
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A CGI "Virtual Idol" from Japan, the young girl is brought to us by a software known as Vocaloid. (Miku is a Vocaloid 2 release to be exact.) The animation of her dancing is usually supplied by the freeware known as MikuMikuDance, but for her video games and many concert appearances, her animation is done by legendary video game software developer, SEGA.<br />
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Every so often, Miku is seen in a concert, sometimes joined by other characters from the Vocaloid line, and even more rare, characters from a line known as UTAU.<br />
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Fans of all ages love her, though her biggest fan-base is comprised of young men. Fans everywhere dress as her, waive their light up "Leeks" in her honor, and even dress their babies in her image.<br />
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Miku's concerts, brought to us by the endlessly cool Pepper's Ghost effect (an effect from the 1800's I might add) over a gigantic screen, are often jam-packed with happy music fans, wanting to see the computer maiden just a little bit closer.<br />
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But her fame, and the fame of other Virtual Idols like her does not surprise me. In fact, it just about seems natural to adore a Superstar of animated quality.<br />
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Just look at Betty Boop for example.<br />
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Betty Boop was the world's first virtual idol, though she wasn't created in the same sense as a Vocaloid. She was the creation of world famous animator Max Fleischer, and she was born as joke on flapper dancers.<br />
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She debuted in the cartoon "Dizzy Dishes" on August 9, 1930 as a large poodle and potential love interest for struggling cartoon star, Bimbo. (Pictured.)<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiry9Z9yBgxxKkToaiAggt_FKTEszsm6f_JjuoEB3kow8G9UA3wPFk8byhnRVvFAeS9XmhcRwzxOoo5_1liBEWVotR1_nDDrM0SmfTqQxDsjZmzWTBKVvSo1XA8rW43Bm3_qucC_GwY7tFW/s1600/FirtBetty.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="247" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiry9Z9yBgxxKkToaiAggt_FKTEszsm6f_JjuoEB3kow8G9UA3wPFk8byhnRVvFAeS9XmhcRwzxOoo5_1liBEWVotR1_nDDrM0SmfTqQxDsjZmzWTBKVvSo1XA8rW43Bm3_qucC_GwY7tFW/s320/FirtBetty.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
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Slightly chubby, very oddly drawn, not much thought was originally put into her. But audiences loved her.</div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhFfMYRMO0o3dNQe4Bau9LLAY-_9dUV2ey0tCCP5LLs51VqOQHqECEO5h2J-1adgxUlaerzanxA5Oq-AOsO2NJElucQA9Duqcuh04wc3OdZX12R4u2wVSeT6wOs7t1kY-kcs6-lffVeNS8G/s1600/BettyBettyBoopBoop.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="274" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhFfMYRMO0o3dNQe4Bau9LLAY-_9dUV2ey0tCCP5LLs51VqOQHqECEO5h2J-1adgxUlaerzanxA5Oq-AOsO2NJElucQA9Duqcuh04wc3OdZX12R4u2wVSeT6wOs7t1kY-kcs6-lffVeNS8G/s320/BettyBettyBoopBoop.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
Over time, as Bimbo became shorter and more dog-like, Betty gained a name and became more human. Her body would take on a slender yet curvy, more ladylike shape, and her dog ears were replaced by gold hoops. Her body would go on to become taller, nearly anorexic before the end of the 1930's, but ultimately would revert to her small, curvy, healthy frame, seen above in color.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhkkEj2D9V0sbPL87Mb2e5kPzLWF0ePIInmpOo3iZUBaLzoVPiVfn5lajpGI7SPn6AgW2hEhafEWN3oQ7CZ-ityacUd-6Y5Ndf-wdDaWwO7kgusVGW-dpvIxEuNHLGqxKvY1ux2K4nfQxuN/s1600/SkinnyBettyMiku.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhkkEj2D9V0sbPL87Mb2e5kPzLWF0ePIInmpOo3iZUBaLzoVPiVfn5lajpGI7SPn6AgW2hEhafEWN3oQ7CZ-ityacUd-6Y5Ndf-wdDaWwO7kgusVGW-dpvIxEuNHLGqxKvY1ux2K4nfQxuN/s320/SkinnyBettyMiku.jpg" width="294" /></a></div>
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Betty was voiced by many talented women, but eventually, her signature "Boop Boop A Doop" voice came courtesy of the talented Mae Questel, who also voiced Olive Oyl in the Fleischer Studios and Paramount Popeye cartoons.<br />
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Similarly, the voice bank for Miku Hatsune was provided by Saki Fujita. To this day, many music fans argue as to whether or not we are listening to Miku and Betty: the animated singers, or to just random, cut up tracks from Mae Questel and Saki Fujita respectively.<br />
<br />
Betty Boop was a cartoon made of pen and ink, and yet people the world over loved her and continue to love her as though she were a real, living person.<br />
<br />
Of course, no idol, virtual or human, can have a long career without scandal.<br />
<br />
In May of 1932, a woman named Helen Kane sued Max Fleischer and Paramount, claiming that Betty was infringing on her baby doll looks, squeaky voice and even the phrase "Boop Boop A Doop". The lawsuit was later thrown out, when it became public knowledge that Helen actually stole her act from a gorgeous, Black starlet, known as Baby Esther. Max Fleischer himself also based some of Betty's mannerisms on the Cotton Club singer, and thus, Ms. Kane's lawsuit was rendered hopeless.<br />
<br />
Miku and Betty have also been the target of criticism from various groups, demanding decency.<br />
<br />
On July 1, 1934, a production code for cartoons and film was set into motion. Betty, then the target of hate group and self-proclaimed "decency" coalition, The Hayes Commission, set into motion a list of rules in regards to all forms of media. Betty was cartoon enemy #1 to them, and many of her cartoons were called into question. The group calling themselves the National Legion of Decency, also urged the Fleischer brothers to make Betty skinny and dress more like a housewife. This was done to make her appear "less" sexy, not more.<br />
<br />
Even now, the biggest problem that both Miku and Betty face, deals with sexuality. Both Idols have been portrayed in many of their songs as being underage teenagers, (both at age 16) yet are still featured in songs dealing with sex, rape, loss of virginity and even songs about drugs and death. (Definitely crossing too many lines.) Many critique how the two are presented to the audience. With their large heads, large eyes, small lips and mostly "unrealistic" and immature body sizes, many feel this glorifies an unhealthy view of the adult female, in that some believe this promotes the "ideal" woman as being a baby-like tween or teen girl.<br />
<br />
Both Idols have also appeared in just as many situations as fully grown and legal aged adults, but even there, many people poke and prod at the women, picking them apart for dressing too sexy.<br />
<br />
For the record, I've yet to meet a cartoon character who was able to draw herself, nor a CGI model who was able to create her own fashions, so it seems rather stupid to blame a fictitious character for how she was "born". As Disney starlet Jessica Rabbit once said, "I'm not bad, I'm just drawn that way". This is by no means an excuse for the questionable songs, but in this rare instance, the phrase "get a life" springs to mind.<br />
<br />
Still, both Idols (as adults) are still viewed as sex symbols to many fans of music and animation, and there is no scandal big enough to squash a pair of Idols with the entire world behind them. No matter how big the problem is, Betty and Miku's fans are always front and center, waiting to defend their beloved Idols from detractors everywhere. Even human musicians are hard-pressed to find the rabid loyalty these two have.<br />
<br />
Since August 9th, 1930, Betty Boop has appeared in more than 110 cartoons, comic strips, specials, commercials and movies, and has appeared on everything from cars and toys, to apparel and home goods. Parents take their baby daughters to festivals in Betty's honor, sending their little ones into (questionable) Betty-alike contests, while young ladies snap up everything Betty Boop, to emulate their most cherished Idol. A love of Betty Boop has never been one of a passing fad, despite changing times. Instead, a love of her is life long, non-stop, and ever expanding.<br />
<br />
On August 31, 2007, just 77 years and 22 days after Betty Boop's debut, Miku Hatsune hit the scene, with her own high-pitched voice. Just as Betty before her, people of all ages the world over love her as if she was their very own family, with people showing their respects online by calling her by the very personal "Miku-chan".<br />
<br />
Betty Boop and Miku Hatsune right at the start of their official days as Virtual Idols, have been sold to us as the perfect celebrities. Marketed to be eternally beautiful, cute, charming, young. Never aging. Always able to change back if they've changed too much. Always perfect, and yet still very smart, strong and opinionated. Neither are afraid to fight for themselves, neither are truthfully passive, and yet both can dive deep into the most gut wrenching emotions when trouble does arise. For CGI and cartoon, no two starlets in the music world have ever appeared more human or more infallible, to countless generations worldwide.<br />
<br />
Aside from having an image and song list based in the often "taboo" subject of sex, both Virtual Idols sing about the very same day-to-day struggles we face even now. Songs about working, overcoming poverty, and keeping the world full of pep and cheer. They sing happy songs, thrilling songs, sad songs, angry songs, and both can emulate every human need and emotion you have within you.<br />
<br />
The cartoon and CGI girls respectively sing to the human soul, and just as many of us love our role-play avatars, our "Selfies", action figures and dolls, so too are we conditioned to love and appreciate these tiny, humanoid sensations. Some even love them as if they were their own children, others love them as a part of themselves. Like a little voice in the dark, representing a fantasy that may even be seen as a side of innocent love.<br />
<br />
We as humans have always loved tiny, at times deformed versions of our species, whether it's in the form of dolls, drawings, statues or any other multitude of products and art. Our museums are overrun with them! We subconsciously try to protect them, nurture them. We gaze at their little movements with the same awe as a child with a music box. We are endlessly captivated and inspired by these minuscule dancers, and even dating to the days of the world's first figurine merchant, we really are not conditioned to care if someone tries to exploit this human trait of ours for money. If it means having our small idols, we have no problem forking over a little cash. We stay up at night, making our avatars, our CGI models, cartoons, dolls, figures, and as humans, we see nothing but joy from this.<br />
<br />
Like Hello Kitty (another cartoon/anime ambassador) both often go on Goodwill tours. Miku Hatsune brings her closest Idols with her to America on occasion, to introduce new fans to her computerized music:<br />
<div style="text-align: center;">
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While not to be outdone, Betty Boop made a 1935 trip to Japan, to greet a generous crowd, who was already waiting to love her:<br />
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<div style="text-align: center;">
<div style="text-align: left;">
And yes, that really is her singing in Japanese.</div>
<br />
<div style="text-align: left;">
Both Miku and Betty have become icons, transcending basic animation and pop music fads, and becoming part of humanity's fiber. We see them as Americana, art, a link to the past and a vision of the future. We no longer even bat an eyelash when they are shown to us as eternally young, female celebrities, nor do we poke and prod at the fashions. We see their career-minded, self assured and youthful antics as empowering. And more and more, men, women and children, have become less afraid to admit publicly that their favorite stars are not even flesh and blood.</div>
<div style="text-align: left;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: left;">
We love all sides of them. And as humans, we will only continue to love Virtual Idols as much as we love ourselves. If we could just harness this same love for our fellow humans, who knows what we could do? But it seems that no matter what the odds are, these two have found a permanent spot in world history.</div>
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Koriander ~ Codename Sailor Earthhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01418462915907400047noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-354705414086327818.post-23619827347580374632013-06-01T00:03:00.002-05:002013-06-01T02:10:50.462-05:001-800-WHA-DAFK Part 2: The Happy Kid Pics Hamster<object height="315" style="clear: left; float: left;" width="420"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/-FteQ4XOXkw?hl=en_US&version=3&rel=0"></param>
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<embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/-FteQ4XOXkw?hl=en_US&version=3&rel=0" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" width="420" height="315" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true"></embed></object>I had so much fun researching old Kids numbers on my original <a href="http://codenamesailorearth.blogspot.com/2013/05/1-800-wha-dafk.html" target="_blank">1-800-WHA-DAFK blog</a>, that I've decided to keep it going with this lost club, from Kids Pics.<br />
<br />
<b>The Happy Hamster/Kid Pics</b> Video Club<br />
937 E Hazelwood Ave<br />
Rahway, NJ 07065<br />
(732) 499-0585<br />
<br />
The Pitch: If you got a $0.50-4.00 VHS tape of Superman, Minnie Mouse or other random cartoons during the late 80's and early 90's, you could see the Happy Hamster, pushing himself onto you as your new best friend. He'd start the tape by asking you to cuddle up, "get cozy", and start enjoying "your favorite cartoons" with him.<br />
<br />
You would then not see him again until the end of the tape, provided that you didn't touch that dial.<br />
<br />
At the end of your tape, he'd tell you that he was just named the head of the Kids Pics club.<br />
<br />
If you join for $10 plus $3 shipping, you will be treated to:<br />
1. A newsletter<br />
2. A poster that reads "The Happy Hamsters Michael Jackson's Greatest Hits"<br />
3. A t-shirt (Sizes Small 6-8, Medium 10-12, Large 14-16)<br />
4. An hour long tape of Mickey Mouse, Mighty Mouse, Bugs Bunny, Woody Woodpecker, Casper and other assorted cartoons.<br />
And if you are a special member, you can also order the Happy Hamster singing Michael Jackson songs on a Vinyl Album, CD or Cassette tape.<br />
<br />
You also have to send in your child's photo, their likes and dislikes, a mini bio and an additional 6% sales tax if you are from New Jersey. You were told this would get your kid into a future newsletter, and tell the world all about him/her.<br />
<br />
In reality? Pedo creeps took your child's information. Many parents were disgusted when they started getting pageant requests in the mail, from sponsors that had bought the children's I.D. from Kid Pics.<br />
<br />
<b>Fate:</b> Sometime in 1990, Kids Pics was rendered defunct. The address now belongs to Curiel, a company devoted to ship transportation. <a href="http://www.curielgroup.com/">http://www.curielgroup.com/</a><br />
<br />
Top Hat Sasquatch has a few surviving pictures here: <a href="http://tophatsasquatch.com/the-happy-hampster/">http://tophatsasquatch.com/the-happy-hampster/</a> though it's not clear where the Happy Hamster is now.<br />
<br />
<b>UPDATE:</b> Here's a little extra history, courtesy of Oddity Archive:<br />
<object height="315" width="420"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/rIeVrNq9pCE?hl=en_US&version=3&rel=0"></param>
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<br />
Kid Pics was a subsidiary of AmVest Video, and may have ceased production as early as 1990. There was a second record released, where the Hamster and his friends parody the Ghostbusters. The company was regarded as a bootlegging company, due to it's suspicious business practices, leaving the record tab on each tape, and hit-or-miss quality.<br />
<br />
The Happy Hamster was almost an off-shoot Alvin and the Chipmunks character, but was altered due to a cease and desist request from the rights holders of Alvin. When the second album was released, extra tracks were added, to "prove" that these were Rahway, new Jersey Hamsters singing, NOT chipmunks.Koriander ~ Codename Sailor Earthhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01418462915907400047noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-354705414086327818.post-88717798474843300482013-05-23T18:35:00.000-05:002013-05-23T18:35:19.173-05:00May I speak to a human being in HUMAN relations please?I am convinced businesses are being run by angry, hormonal tween girls. Why? Because only a tween girl the day she realizes Justin Bieber will never date her would act this badly.<br />
<br />
And even then, I'd rather talk to the little girl than these people.<br />
<br />
This is how my last few days have been lately:<br />
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I have a move coming up. I don't accept this BS.<br />
<br />
I called on the job I drew these cartoons for yesterday. By the way, there's no magical pen and paper fairy for we cartoonists, so in case you are wondering, that's part of why I'm even bothering to get a monkey job at this point. The other of course being that I'm trying to pay for a move. There's no magic Government money available to those wanting to move out of state.<br />
<br />
I got on the phone promptly at 8 this morning, to talk to a company I applied to two months ago. For the sake of the article, let's pretend their name is the "Quacker Ducky Group". No that's not their real name, but any group that can't be bothered to actually do their job is not worthy of a professional name.<br />
<br />
The first number I dialed told me to dial a second number. The second number told me that I had mistakenly reached the Virginia office, and offered me a third number. The third transferred me to a fourth, who transferred me to a fifth.<br />
<br />
Each person told me the exact same thing. "Oh noooooooooooooooooo darlin'! You don't want to talk to meeeeeee, you need to talk to THAT person, it's THEIR job to fix this mess. Not meeeee."<br />
<br />
Caller number five sent me to a robot, who gave me HALF of an email address.<br />
<br />
So I dialed them back right away.<br />
<br />
*RING RING*<br />
<br />
<br />
"WHAT? Whatdoyouwant?? Oh? You applied and nobody got back to you? GAWD okay I guess if you really want to talk to someone in HR about it, you can call this number. Someone will totally talk to you about it." (Actual conversation)<br />
<br />
*Calls number*<br />
<br />
Robot: Thank you for calling. Please leave a message for *CLICK dooooooooot*<br />
<br />
This is insane. I dialed them back AGAIN.<br />
<br />
"WHAT!??"<br />
<br />
"May I speak to a human being in Human Relations?"<br />
<br />
"... Didn't you just call? GAWD what is your problem??"<br />
<br />
Oh... I get it Mr. Customer Service Representative. I'm supposed to be taking YOUR job. I see. No wonder you're being a little pissy pants today.<br />
<br />
So I sweetly explain that the number I was sent to is run by a robot that hung up on me.<br />
<br />
"GAWD just use the website."<br />
<br />
"The website is broken."<br />
<br />
"UGH fine, okay, just hold on, alright??"<br />
<br />
I listen to what sounds to be a rendition on acoustic guitar of the "Save File in a Cave" theme from Final Fantasy three... as done by a drunk Taylor Swift and three homeless hipsters after group stubbing their toes at a busy Starbucks. A very melancholy sound.<br />
<br />
"Hello thank yew fer calling Quacker Ducky Group, my name is Sheila, how many I help yew?" Says the nicest voice I've heard all morning.<br />
<br />
"Hello, who may I speak to about obtaining employment?"<br />
<br />
"Didja use the website?"<br />
<br />
"I did. It's broken. It tells me on the front that I have no applications on file, but when I click on my name, I can read my application and each place I have applied to."<br />
<br />
"Oh no that won't do! Okay, all of the Human Relations people? They've gone away. So what I can suggest is that you call us again at 2:30 our time, which is Eastern. M'Kay? Have a nice day now!"<br />
<br />
So I take a nap. A sleep deprived Kori is not a very nice Kori to deal with after all of this, but as I fell asleep, I hoped that this last person gets a bonus for dealing with the ogre I did.<br />
<br />
I later call back at the specified time.<br />
<br />
"WHAT?? Why do you keep calling? GAWD hold on!!!"<br />
<br />
I got sent to another robot. Who again hung up on me. This is insane.<br />
<br />
I call back.<br />
<br />
"WHAT??"<br />
<br />
"Hello, may I speak to a <b><u><i>human being</i></u></b> in Human Relations, please?" I explain the damage thus far.<br />
<br />
"Hold on, OKAY??"<br />
<br />
Ah, Taylor Swift and the Homeless Hipsters ripping apart another Final Fantasy theme. See if you can guess this little diddy? ♫ DAH DAH DAH DAAAAAH DAAAAH DEE DAH DEEEEEE ♪ Now imagine that being yelled out by Florence and the Machines at the top of their lungs, m'kay? And they're sad. Really pouring their souls into it, like a hipster whining about their feelings during a breakup at Starbucks.<br />
<br />
*CLICK* "There's nobody here. Here's an answering machine, OKAY??"<br />
<br />
*THIS IS THE ANSWERING MACHINE FOR <i><span style="font-size: xx-small;">VNDGDRMNG DFLCKR</span></i> PLEASE LEVE A MESSAGE AFTER THE TONE ~ BEEEP*<br />
<br />
The woman for whom I was to leave a message for, has a name made entirely our of consonants. How can i even address this person?<br />
<br />
I called one more time, and was given an email address to voice my issue.<br />
<br />
What I got back three hours later was a Mailer-Demon:<br />
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Kori is livid and speaking in third person now.</div>
<br />
Kori is seeing red.<br />
<br />
Kori suddenly get why people want to buy guns.<br />
<br />
So I called back again.<br />
<br />
"WHAT YOU AGAIN???"<br />
<br />
"Yes, I am calling back because the people you keep sending me to are robots. Your website is broken, your system is broken and your email address sent me back a Mailer-Demon. Now may I please speak to an actual human being about this?"<br />
<br />
"Grr........................... Hang on."<br />
<br />
So I am sent to another customer service rep.<br />
<br />
"Thank you for calling Quacker Ducky Group. My name is Droopy. *cheeks flap* Please state your business."<br />
<br />
I explain the problem.<br />
<br />
"Fhmmmmhm... Okay ma'am. Give me oooone second."<br />
<br />
Ah. Now the Hipsters are doing that weird chanting thing I hear at coffee shops. Ah, but in the Final Fantasy "somebody died and it's kinda sad" theme. There are some sincere SNES Final Fantasy 3 fans here.<br />
<br />
"Okay ma'am are you still there? *cheek flap cheek flap* I think I found the right person, just hang on on hold until I get her back."<br />
<br />
You know, you can just about hear the acoustic guitarist cutting himself on the strings while he plays.<br />
<br />
"Hellew thank yew fer callin'. This is Bethurz for Quacker Ducky Group, how may I assist yew?"<br />
<br />
"Hello, who may I speak to about gaining employment with your company?"<br />
<br />
"Well yew can go onliiiine"<br />
<br />
"Your website is broken. May I speak to a human being in Human Relations please?"<br />
<br />
"I'm the head of Human Relatioooooons."<br />
<br />
"Splendid!" I tell her all about the broken website, the broken email and the fact that it's taken two whole months for me NOT to be called back. I hear her type my name one....... letter........... at ......... a..... time.<br />
<br />
"Well I see yer in the system... Are you aware that the last two jobs you applied to are in Kansas and Arizona?"<br />
<br />
KANSAS AND ARIWHAT???<br />
<br />
I explain that the website sais they were in the area I'm aiming for. NOT Kansas and Arizona.<br />
<br />
"Well I dun't buleeve the website is busted."<br />
<br />
"I choose to disagree, ma'am. I know what it said."<br />
<br />
"Well I can see the url, and it does say the wrong place is listed, but i fail to see how that makes it broken."<br />
<br />
<span style="font-size: xx-small;">What?</span><br />
<br />
"I see on yer resume that yew are a website designer............ is that a real job, web maintenance?"<br />
<br />
"Yes ma'am it is. It takes a long time to build a website so it both looks nice and works properly." I stopped myself from explaining that there is no HTML fairy that grants me templates with a song, JAVA pixies that magically weave together image-slider codes on my behalf, or graphics gnomes that make the images appear out of my ass. A real-life human being has to build those.<br />
<br />
"Well I guess I can take yer wurd for it then, but I dunnooooooooooo. Are yew even willing to show UP for this jawb?"<br />
<br />
"Of course I am, I'm relocating to the area, I can be as close as you need to the position. I can be there early if you want me to."<br />
<br />
"Well unfortunately few yeeewww we just now filled up our training classes until Ju-lyyyyy. And if you're a very good girl and say yer prayers tonight, then maaaaybe, juuuust maaaaaaaybe, yew will get a cawl back next week after the Holiday, m'kaaaay? Also this is a $10.50 an hour job."<br />
<br />
"Out of curiosity, do you do relocation?"<br />
<br />
"Ewwww why would I do that? If yer gonna move, do it yourself!"<br />
<br />
I asked her for a specific time in which to expect a phonecall, and was told "MAYBE" next week. Also, by sending in my cell and my home number, it makes me seem out of touch and desperate.<br />
<br />
I thanked her for her time, sat down and screamed as loud as I could.<br />
<br />
For once, the neighbors understood.<br />
Koriander ~ Codename Sailor Earthhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01418462915907400047noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-354705414086327818.post-72732857726042775322013-05-10T18:37:00.000-05:002013-05-10T18:37:15.523-05:00Suicide BatingI don't always recommend a Facebook page, but I feel it would be a disservice not to share this one.<br />
<br />
There's a new Facebook page called <a href="https://www.facebook.com/SuicideBaitingCrowdPrevention" target="_blank">Suicide Bating Prevention</a>, and if you don't know what Suicide Bating is, let me tell you.<br />
<br />
Suicide Bating is when someone (or a group of someones) continually harass an individual, until they become so depressed that they kill themselves.<br />
<br />
We foolishly allow society to write this all off under the cute name of "bullying".<br />
<br />
We ignore bullying and refuse to see it for what it is.<br />
<br />
Bullying can be a combination of the following:<br />
<br />
1. Physical Assault<br />
2. Slander/Harassment/Mental Abuse<br />
3. Stalking<br />
4. Hacking<br />
<br />
Yet we allow police enforcement to look the other way.<br />
<br />
We say it's "kids being kids" and we put the blame on the victim.<br />
<br />
We laugh at hate shrines on the internet, and call them "satire" and devote t-shirts and buttons to every website that slams random people on the internet, even laughing when a site posts a photo of a teenager, detailing a list of ways he or she can and "should" kill themselves.<br />
<br />
We teach our children to name-call, and we glorify hateful people, by casting them as "the hero" in movies, TV shows and books. And I'm not talking about any violent pictures here, I mean shows like <i>Sex in the City </i>and <i>Gossip Girl</i>, which glorify women who spend their days judging people at random and exhibiting acts of misandry by having these characters treat men like dirt. And children's cartoons like <i>Total Drama Island</i>, <i>Jem</i> and <i>6Teen</i>, which all promote intolerance, hatred of people based on differences, and in the case of <i>Total Drama</i>, physical bullying. And again, the characters doing the bullying, are the "good" guys.<br />
<br />
We insist that there's something "wrong" with the victim, and we ignore their pleas for help, by spitting in his/her face, and saying they need to "just deal" with it.<br />
<br />
When it's an adult victim? When adults bully other adults? We just say "not everyone is your friend" and then act surprised when another suicide happens.<br />
<br />
Suicide Bating is something I'm too familiar with.<br />
<br />
I was bullied as a child, but when I became homeschooled and then grew up, I figured that this was all water under the bridge. I figured this was part of my past now, and I didn't give bullying another thought.<br />
<br />
Then a couple of years ago, a group of complete strangers started cyber stalking me. A hate shrine was posted about me, my inbox was flooded, my accounts were hacked and my family was harassed, all because I posted a 3 minute CGI video of Miku Hatsune in pink, dancing. For real.<br />
<br />
I lost out on job opportunities and I didn't know a moment's peace. I seriously thought about ending it.<br />
<br />
Then I cracked open my YouTube email, and I got a long email from a 10 year old named Susan. She was going through almost the same level of harassment I was, and needed help.<br />
<br />
Susan wasn't alone. I nearly lost two friends to Suicide Bating that same year. All of us reported our cyber stalkers and hackers to the FBI, the police, anybody in law enforcement with an open ear.<br />
<br />
Nobody helped.<br />
<br />
The only reason why one of my stalkers is behind bars right now, is because he helped hack the FBI. But until they were attacked, my case was closed, and I was told that because I posted ANYTHING online ~ even in the form of a job application ~ that I "had better" understand that everything of me posted online is "permanent" and essentially by having an online presence at all, I left myself open to attacks. In short, if you post your real name online, people you have never met "have the right" to express their First Amendment rights to harass you. If you die by suicide because of it, it's your own fault for not being able to handle "the real world".<br />
<br />
Something has to change.<br />
<br />
I initially started a <a href="https://www.facebook.com/pages/Fight-MikuMikuDance-MMD-Vocaloid-and-UTAU-Bullies-online/171535852900052" target="_blank">Facebook page</a>, only to address harassment related to the freeware MikuMikuDance, which is what I used when I made my "evil" video of the girl dancing. I figured this was the root of the bullying problem for me and for the people on YouTube I was associated with. It's a small page, and I viewed it as a small step.<br />
<br />
But soon I started adding all types of bullying articles to the page, to show people how widespread the problem is, and that most of the worst "bullying" is coming from adults ~ NOT kids. The page now has articles about many forms of bullying, even school related.<br />
<br />
But no story cut me to the core like the story of Kathie Yount.<br />
<br />
Her lovely son was a victim of Suicide bating.<br />
<br />
<a href="http://ipinionsyndicate.com/suicide-baiting-they-cheered-while-my-son-jumped/" target="_blank">As posted in this article</a>, a group of people he did not know, bullied him non-stop. One day, as he stood on a ledge, not only did he have to deal with his own trauma, he looked down to see a sea of adults, cheering him on to jump. They laughed and heckled him as he lay dying.<br />
<br />
Not a single police officer stepped in to do anything.<br />
<br />
Not one soul has been taken into custody.<br />
<br />
Nothing has been done.<br />
<br />
It's time to change that.<br />
<br />
Kathie has started her Facebook page, to warn others about Suicide Bating. If you must "Like" any page in the world today, please make it her page.<br />
<br />
I want to see the world change.Koriander ~ Codename Sailor Earthhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01418462915907400047noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-354705414086327818.post-86847263516437272792013-05-10T00:18:00.003-05:002013-05-10T00:18:49.436-05:001-800-WHA-DAFKWhen I was a kid, we had a ton of Fan Clubs and character related phone numbers you could dial. Parents used to shell out $20 a call it seems, just so their kids could hear tapes of TV characters, or join a fan club that would get you no closer to your favorite actor than you are right now.<br />
<br />
I don't really miss them.<br />
<br />
But what happens to the numbers when the character is no longer popular? Well.... here's a few.<br />
<br />
<br />
<b>Wally Bear</b><br />
1-800-449-2559<br />
1-800-HI-WALLY<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgPw7u7EtCwdYg6cQPkigzaf5Kxee0cvwgg-35JemlMFpRK50Ug3vGhx2Q5e3VeJuIVsy5mEr_YlmX5Yl41RHSAXSt3XRDA282Ti2k7U39bRnnJjSZGZsI55r4cfnRxvZEtolzLJPiCwkSk/s1600/NESWally+Bear+and+the+No+Gangbox.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgPw7u7EtCwdYg6cQPkigzaf5Kxee0cvwgg-35JemlMFpRK50Ug3vGhx2Q5e3VeJuIVsy5mEr_YlmX5Yl41RHSAXSt3XRDA282Ti2k7U39bRnnJjSZGZsI55r4cfnRxvZEtolzLJPiCwkSk/s320/NESWally+Bear+and+the+No+Gangbox.jpg" width="232" /></a></div>
<br />
<br />
<br />
The number first debuted with an unauthorized NES game, titles "Wally and the No Gang". Kids playing the game would be told in every level about the dangers of drugs, and were encouraged to dial the number, and have Wally himself talk to them (via a pre-recorded message) about being straight edge.<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<object height="315" width="420"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/UrjVO7EKMV4?hl=en_US&version=3&rel=0"></param>
<param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param>
<param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param>
<embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/UrjVO7EKMV4?hl=en_US&version=3&rel=0" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" width="420" height="315" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true"></embed></object></div>
<b>Fate:</b> The number stayed in service until 2008. It became the subject of an Angry video Game Nerd video, but just as Wally was having himself a comeback, the number went dormant.<br />
<br />
<b>Princess and the Goblin's Princess Irene Hotline</b><br />
1-800-99-47363<br />
1-800-99-IRENE<br />
256 S. Robertson BLVD.<br />
Beverly Hills, CA<br />
90211<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjEpoT0vhLLHi5GbaAzG-B_5UM_4t_-RWs586x1lj0bTaOX7_x_0P58feRJg6t5WGKMh7zwOFTQel2mTdlMYLHFBC5XVFrlnq6hHfE0SnO1pdzNC5-bDFBPI7gbwA3Wp5UkwkWhNFTOodc2/s1600/Goblin-1.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="237" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjEpoT0vhLLHi5GbaAzG-B_5UM_4t_-RWs586x1lj0bTaOX7_x_0P58feRJg6t5WGKMh7zwOFTQel2mTdlMYLHFBC5XVFrlnq6hHfE0SnO1pdzNC5-bDFBPI7gbwA3Wp5UkwkWhNFTOodc2/s320/Goblin-1.JPG" width="320" /></a><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhqjhGRGtYIn_FkB3RYdqm24Aef4v3gtnUzgJthmBB0ZmznlJMSr5RlIKgp6Ahw_pljnO09VxbSZ8Xp1l3ILvP6r4hmJw3nLw9DJmtI6YJQ83nUcFka7DZiQTdkdFM56Dna-t_d5sgP-Dsn/s1600/Goblin-2.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="248" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhqjhGRGtYIn_FkB3RYdqm24Aef4v3gtnUzgJthmBB0ZmznlJMSr5RlIKgp6Ahw_pljnO09VxbSZ8Xp1l3ILvP6r4hmJw3nLw9DJmtI6YJQ83nUcFka7DZiQTdkdFM56Dna-t_d5sgP-Dsn/s320/Goblin-2.JPG" width="320" /></a></div>
<br />
The pitch what that along with this children's VHS, you got a "magic phone card" or a form to send away for one. With the prepaid phone card, you you "for free" call movie characters Irene, Great Great Grandmother Irene or Curdie, and they would give you safety instructions and a way to call your family.<br />
<br />
<b>Fate: </b>The number is now defunct, while the building is being used as the home for the BEVERLY HILLS RESEARCH CENTER for the PROALUS Penile growth system.<br />
Their website is <a href="http://www.viarexlabs.com/proalus/contact.asp">http://www.viarexlabs.com/proalus/contact.asp</a><br />
<br />
<b>Sailor Moon Fan Club:</b><br />
1-800-378-LUNA<br />
1-800-378-5862<br />
Sailor Moon Fan Club<br />
Po Box 1379<br />
Hollywood CA 90078<br />
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<br />
For a $35 membership and way too much in shipping, you could become a "Junior Sailor Scout" and receive in the mail a clear bag (either a sack or mini backpack) containing a small, random assortment of the following:<br />
1. A paper doll<br />
2. A piece of paper congratulating you and droning about the environment<br />
3. A handful of trading cards with incorrect information on them<br />
4. A certificate<br />
5. A cardboard tag with a badly drawn Sailor Moon on it<br />
6. A set of stick on earrings<br />
7. A tiny notebook<br />
8. A ruler<br />
9. A pen that has enough ink for maybe 3 uses<br />
10. Pencils<br />
11. Sticky notes<br />
<br />
<b>Fate:</b><br />
Both the number and the P.O. Box became defunct in 1999, around the time that the three movies were released in the United States, DiC lost the bidding war for the post-R seasons and Cloverway began sending out Sailormoon S.<br />
<br />
<b>Mighty Morphin Power Rangers Fan Clu</b>b<br />
1-800-667-7321 (Main number from the VHS)<br />
1-800-300-6993 (Credit Card ordering number)<br />
P.O. Box 222<br />
Hollywood, Ca. 90078<br />
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For $17.95 (and a few VHS slips from the Green Ranger arc) you could become a Junior Power Ranger ~ a few years ahead of Turbo's Justin, only the Pre-Bieber Brat got a Zord and super powers for his membership, while you just got a cardboard box. ($18.90 for California residents, $21.95 for Canada) Send a check or money order, no cash.<br />
<br />
But inside that box was a random assortment of the following:<br />
1. A "Power Lunch" sack (sometimes with a Fruit Roll-Up)<br />
2. A 30 minute VHS tape featuring clips from the show and all six Power Rangers talking about being a part of D.A.R.E. to be drug free, junk food and their lives as Power Rangers, along with a trailer for V.R. Troopers<br />
3. A congratulations letter, stressing that you should now live up to the high standards of MMPR living and reminding you to watch VR Troopers (I forgot how annoying they were plugging that failure of a show)<br />
4. A certificate, proclaiming you an official Junior Ranger... because all Rangers have them, right? It has printed signatures of the cast, not really signed by them.<br />
5. A form to share with a friend to get them to send $17.95 plus shipping<br />
6. Ads telling you to buy more fan club stuff<br />
7. Photos of the Power Rangers with printed signatures<br />
8. A Power Rangers poster<br />
9. A VR Troopers mini poster/ad<br />
10. Iron-on Logos<br />
11. MMPR Power Dollars to buy more stuff (Usually you'd get ONE. Only redeemable for the Fan Club.)<br />
12. Logo Stickers<br />
13. Logo Tattoos<br />
14. ID Card with D.A.R.E. tips on the back (or on a second card)<br />
15. Shoelaces<br />
16. Window Clings<br />
17. Morphin Times Newsletter (which could also be ordered seperately for free)<br />
18. Mighty Morphin Power Rangers magazine (Sold by itself quarterly or as a subscription until late 1995. Was replaced with the Zeo magazine after the fan club folded, but that publication only lasted a few months.)<br />
19. Local Fox Station ad<br />
20. D.A.R.E. Power Rangers autographed card<br />
<br />
For extra cash and a copy of your photo, you could also get your head Photoshopped onto a stock photo of a Power Ranger body. There were alternate boxes where you'd get the same stuff as before, but with an alternate VHS cover, and later a VHS tape of Tommy's Training, but that tape was also released in stores as a stand alone.<br />
<b><br /></b>
<b>Fate:</b> The P.O. Box is listed on the BBB as "MMPR Business", but it is currently being used as Twerp Creative Web Consulting: <a href="http://www.thumbtack.com/ca/los-angeles/web-developers/wed-development-graphic-design-creative-consulting">http://www.thumbtack.com/ca/los-angeles/web-developers/wed-development-graphic-design-creative-consulting</a><br />
<br />
The main phone number was used by HSBC's harassing collection agency. But after a number of complaints from the FCC involving workers at the agency violating telecommunication regulations and even harassing people who had never had a credit card with said bank, the number was recently dropped.<br />
<br />
Many of the numbers we had as kids are now being used by telemarketers and collection agencies. But more often than not, the numbers end up as adult sex lines.<br />
<br />
I can't recommend calling them now.<br />
Koriander ~ Codename Sailor Earthhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01418462915907400047noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-354705414086327818.post-89178211087461744872013-05-08T17:19:00.000-05:002013-05-08T17:19:00.791-05:00Human Relations DebacleWhat happened, America?<br />
<br />
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Why did we allow lazy, good for nothing, whiny, birdbrained wastes of space, to not only get hired at "Human relations" people, but also get away with NOT hiring United States citizens, instead relying on scam artist corporations like Recruiterbox, Vector Marketing and PeopleScout to sift through "ew, icky resumes" for them??<br />
<br />
If these names don't sound familiar to you, Google them. These companies are run in a fly-by-night fashion, offering software and a dedicated team of here today, gone tomorrow keyboard jockeys, trained to weed out everybody with an I.Q. above that of a brain damaged chimp, so you don't have to hire anybody.<br />
<br />
And when they're done helping you ignore emails, sit on your duff and not let your pretty, little company hire anybody, and the work you actually do need done starts to pile up, what happens? That's right. Your company hires out illegal aliens and other non-US-born-people. Why? Because these people are so desperate to try and do well and earn an honest day's pay, and take care of their families, that they are willing to work below minimum wage. o these people almost work slave wages, while the actual US citizens that for serious wanted your shitty job, die homeless on the streets, because nobody had the balls to hire them.<br />
<br />
Now I am NOT proud of this, and I highly discourage you from doing this, but these were my tweets after Twitter dropped RecruiterBox into my feed without my prior knowledge or consent.<br />
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Not my best, but when US jobs are on the line, I get pissed.</div>
Koriander ~ Codename Sailor Earthhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01418462915907400047noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-354705414086327818.post-54020137870821342212013-04-28T04:27:00.003-05:002013-04-28T04:34:48.246-05:00Did Charles Schultz kill a Peanuts child? The life and times of Charlotte Braun.When I was a very tiny tot, I used the comics in the newspaper as a way to better my ability to read. I remember at just-turned-four being very proud of myself for reading an entire Beetle Bailey strip by myself AND understanding the war related humor.<br />
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It shouldn't be a surprise that I also read The Peanuts. When I became serious about being a cartoonist, I drew (pun not intended) inspiration after reading a book by Charles Schultz, about his struggles with being accepted in the world of cartooning. Every time I've had a rejection letter sent my way, I remember his struggles getting into the newspaper, and stop feeling sorry for myself.<br />
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But around the time that I was learning to read AND understand bigger and bigger strips (I was probably the only toddler following Doonesbury and Bloom County) I started noticing that many of the comic strip characters started popping up on TV specials. Family Circus, For Better or for Worse, Garfield, Dennis the Menace and of course, The Peanuts gang, didn't just have TV shows, they had specials. And some of them were unsettling.<br />
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In 1990's "Why Charlie Brown Why" Linus befriends a little blonde girl named Janice, who has cancer. Pretty hefty stuff for kids' television. She comes close to dying, but ends up going into remission.... but then she never appears again. She's never spoken of again, never even appears in background scenes, and her ultimate fate is left to your imagination. This little episode garnered me a depressing and morbid view into the minds of those involved with Peanuts, and started making me question things.<br />
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Now for years, I've always just accepted that some of the kids in Charlie's life just move away, but I do have a morbid curiosity (thank you Disney >_O) with children's cartoons, and I started to wonder, did any of them die?<br />
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After all, Doonesbury has always been quick to kill characters, as has Dick Tracy and Funky Winkerbean. And Charles Schultz once voiced his angry disapproval, when the cartoonist behind For Better or for Worse had beloved dog Farley die, trying to save April, my least favorite character. (As a tween, I secretly hoped that it was April meeting her end instead of the dog. Probably not my finest hour reading the newspaper.) But could he have been a hypocrite when it comes to sketching the death of a comic strip character?<br />
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Well the firm answer is <b><span style="font-size: x-large;">YES</span></b>.<br />
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On November 30, 1954, Charlie Brown met up with a sassy little girl named Charlotte Braun.<br />
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Charlotte Braun was a loudmouth, who couldn't control the volume of her voice. Charlie Brown even remarks in one strip "She's the only girl I know who has a built-in High-Fidelity speaker" after a short exchange with her, left him wincing. </div>
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Little did anybody know that her tenth ever appearance in the February 1, 1955 Peanuts strip... would be her final appearance alive....</div>
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Other children shunned her, because she was just too loud. Linus would hide under his blanket to avoid her. She was also bossy, rude and a bit of a bully, not unlike Lucy, who at the time still had a limited vocabulary, and was far younger than Charlie. Many readers disliked her. She was too serious, too brash, far too harsh for the series at that point.</div>
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Charlotte's loudmouth antics also peeked the ire of a reader named Elizabeth Swaim.<br />
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Elizabeth and her friends bombarded Charles Schultz with hate letters about Charlotte Braun. Elizabeth was the loudest voice among her group, pleading for an end to this little girl.<br />
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But as the hate letters were rolling in (Charles already had a second batch from unrelated people, many claiming to be in his business, insisting he would never be a "real" cartoonist and should hang it up now) Schultz realized that he was out of ideas for Charlotte Braun. All of the jokes he wanted to tell had been told, and he had already decided to age Lucy, and consolidate some of Charlotte Braun's mannerisms into Lucy, starting with the plain, blue dress.<br />
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So finally, having had enough of the letters about her, Charles sent Elizabeth a very dark letter:<br />
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<span style="color: blue; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"> <b><i>Jan, 5, 1955</i></b></span><br />
<b><i><span style="color: blue; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">Dear Miss Swain,</span></i></b><br />
<b><i><span style="color: blue; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"> I am taking your suggestion regarding Charlotte Braun and will eventually discard her. Remember, however, that you and your friends will have the death of an innocent child on your conscience. Are you prepared to accept such responsibility?<br /><br />Thanks for writing, and I hope that future releases will please you.<br />Sincerely,<br />Charles M. Schultz</span></i></b><br />
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He ended the letter with a new drawing of little Charlotte Braun, standing straight up on a grassy plain, looking very sad... with an ax, firmly placed deep inside of her skull.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhvPFIxXSsOP4YUf-A-lZ0RhYUsZdBkDmkowwsBJi-GU-iDMpb0eHcSePKoe0J_KNs8IeFLzKv2E61lE-m4w7GjK39GxJvmFgSLOyCRio7jyFyZviRdkvoWC32keNHSqtRN1t1C2-N3aqVE/s1600/CharlesSchultzKillsCharlotte.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhvPFIxXSsOP4YUf-A-lZ0RhYUsZdBkDmkowwsBJi-GU-iDMpb0eHcSePKoe0J_KNs8IeFLzKv2E61lE-m4w7GjK39GxJvmFgSLOyCRio7jyFyZviRdkvoWC32keNHSqtRN1t1C2-N3aqVE/s400/CharlesSchultzKillsCharlotte.jpg" width="248" /></a></div>
Charlotte was about five or six at the time of her death, and being murdered made her very sad.<br />
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Her final appearance wouldn't be run until the following month, but Schultz had drawn the "High-Fidelity" strip at the same time he wrote this letter. With that said, there is a mystery as to who gave her the ax exactly, the world famous cartoonist Charles Schultz? Or was it Charlie Brown, just tired of this loudmouth following him everywhere, shattering his eardrums for her own, sick amusement.<br />
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But then she also had no control over her voice, making her death even worse, as this could have been her disability.<br />
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With that said, Charles Schultz killed a special needs Peanuts child off, just to make a women he did not know, shut up.<br />
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And shut up she did.<br />
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Two months after Schultz died in 2000, she donated the letter to the Smithsonian. <a href="http://abcnews.go.com/US/story?id=95903&page=1#.UXzpnLVwqSq" target="_blank">As ABC reported</a>:<br />
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<i><span style="color: red;"><b>“I am now enrolled in a hospice and do not expect to live much longer—and want to place what might loosely be called my treasures,” Swaim wrote. “...I would not be sending the letter until somewhat closer to my death, but I’d like to save my executor the trouble of disposing of it.”</b></span></i><br />
<i><span style="color: red;"><b><br /></b></span></i>
<i><span style="color: red;"><b>Swaim died of cancer three weeks later, at the age of 66. Her younger sister, Kathleen Swaim, said that the framed response had hung in Elizabeth Swain’s bathroom.</b></span></i><br />
<i><span style="color: red;"><b><br /></b></span></i>
<i><span style="color: red;"><b>“She was very pleased that he had answered,” Kathleen Swaim recalled. Elizabeth Swaim went on to become librarian of rare books and archivist at Wesleyan University in Middletown, Conn. Her first library job, ironically, had been at the Library of Congress.</b></span></i><br />
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But for the rest of her days, she had it hung over her head, that she was responsible for the death of a child in Peanuts. Friends, family, total strangers researching the little Peanuts character would be told of Charlotte's final days, and how Elizabeth's letters ended a member of Charlie Brown and Snoopy's team.<br />
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And now for the rest of eternity, the letter and envelope Schultz sent her are on display at the Smithsonian. Her family's descendants will forever be reminded of who killed Charlotte Braun.Koriander ~ Codename Sailor Earthhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01418462915907400047noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-354705414086327818.post-14835183013257234932013-04-24T23:51:00.001-05:002013-04-24T23:51:40.428-05:00A Toe Up Day<object height="169" style="clear: left; float: left;" width="300"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/cj6gCj5oRCw?hl=en_US&version=3&rel=0"></param>
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But why stop there?<br />
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So as you can see in the video, I tried to hide it, but I do have psoriasis and a tinge of eczema, which are non-contagious and highly annoying auto-immune diseases. Now I tried to treat it by myself with over the counter remedies, but nothing worked. If anything it spread, so I went to see a doctor at a brand new clinic, just a mile up from my house. It's in a strip mall, just about the size of a hallway, and shares parking with the Chipotle, Five Guys and a tiny shoe store. Totally safe, right?<br />
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The entire visit didn't even last five minutes. A tiny woman from India really quickly gave me an examination from a distance with a pen, and jotted down my prescription. Seeing me in severe pain, she says "I want to give you a blood screening, but you have no insurance my darling! So this is all I can do." I never got her name. (That's not bad, right?)<br />
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Well the prescription strength Benadryl that<a href="http://codenamesailorearth.blogspot.com/2013/04/lucy84-and-phone-more-important-than.html" target="_blank"> took me for freaking ever</a> to obtain, combined with a cream and a second pill worked a miracle. I stopped looking like Elmo and started looking like a regular person again. The next time I saw her, I only had a few small spots on my arm.<br />
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... Then 68 hours into the first blog link I posted, I get three new spots. So naturally I call the doctor.<br />
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She says she'll call in a prescription for me for an antibiotic cream. Did you know that stress and mold spore contact are both BAD things for psoriasis? Weeee.<br />
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So I figure that I'll get the cream and that will be that.<br />
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This morning I woke up to an interesting phonecall from my pharmacy.<br />
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They had a "glitch" with my prescription.<br />
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Guess what?<br />
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I don't have a doctor anymore.<br />
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Apparently she "went away" and don't work there anymore. They couldn't even verify if she was a real doctor. Awesomesauce.<br />
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Well stress and figuring out how a doctor could "go away" in the span of two weeks... kind of makes me hungry. So I took a walk to Walgreen's to pick up dinner. Along the way, I stopped at the car dealership that sold my mom a lemon of a Buick:<br />
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How that place stays in business I have no idea. But I saw they have a new car for sale:<br />
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Complete with bungee cords holding the bumper on.</div>
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Sealed shut bottle of Spic n' Span in the drink compartment.</div>
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Those are USED boxers under that sign.</div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjpU8OmJIrPQ7ZaUxsQ8e0vKIDKuj4-uPJIH3eY2iwJpfcgk7cnKFc6zRB6QY-cukxjj-0c-8wS46ADTzc2gm2HxVqrLTOKqHvx-czw-E85PiBAMm4PPGdOWcW_uwxvOqC4RXWgwDq5lC_-/s1600/0424131859-01.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjpU8OmJIrPQ7ZaUxsQ8e0vKIDKuj4-uPJIH3eY2iwJpfcgk7cnKFc6zRB6QY-cukxjj-0c-8wS46ADTzc2gm2HxVqrLTOKqHvx-czw-E85PiBAMm4PPGdOWcW_uwxvOqC4RXWgwDq5lC_-/s320/0424131859-01.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
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More used underwear.</div>
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Next to the car shop are a comic shop and a pizza place ~ both just went out of business the other day.</div>
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Moving is going to be awesome.</div>
Koriander ~ Codename Sailor Earthhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01418462915907400047noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-354705414086327818.post-1305039498667952252013-04-20T19:46:00.002-05:002013-04-21T05:58:28.314-05:00I think Jerry Springer knows my neighbors.This post is going to have plenty of fowl language and bold text. Reader discretion is advised.<br />
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The following is a true story. The names have been changed to protect the stupid.<br />
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Dialogue is taken verbatim.<br />
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So<a href="http://codenamesailorearth.blogspot.com/2013/04/application-for-mop.html" target="_blank"> picking up from my last blog</a>, I never got my Indiana Government approved mop and bucket. My neighbors are still on the waiting list for theirs, and may not receive any until the end of May. My house is now much drier, but my mom discovered cracks in the foundation. I'm no house inspector, but I'm pretty sure that's a <i>bad</i> thing. Ah well, at least it's a bright and sunny day, and the weather is really nice, so really, what more can I ask for?<br />
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.... How about new neighbors? Yeah that would be rad.<br />
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Behind my house is an alley, where the entire cast of Jerry Springer circa 1998 lives. Which is funny, since I legit live four blocks down from a couple that really were on an episode of Jerry Springer. This was back when Jerry took cameras to peoples' houses, and there is an episode where he showed up, and his crew videotaped a brawl between two sisters fighting over the man they loved... who was also their cousin. It's both sad and thrilling to say "My neighbors were on Jerry Springer" and it's so true too.<br />
<br />
Behind my house are three houses, crammed together really closely. Chain-link fences, yards full of old garbage, half empty pools, dilapidated garages, and each one is owned by a half dressed couple with about 3-5 children, under the age of 8. And each child has pockets full of little fireworks, cherry bombs, snappers, and the ring leader has a Budweiser bottle, lovingly strapped to his bike by dear old Daddy. I shit you not.<br />
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These are the people who've been getting drunk on and around my property the last few years I've lived here, and have some pretty mean dogs.<br />
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Now granted, these beasts are not as dangerous as <a href="http://codenamesailorearth.blogspot.com/2013/01/maria-says-byeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee.html" target="_blank">Maria's Hell Beasts</a>, but this is the <u><b>third</b></u> chain-link fence the neighbors have needed in two years. I was outside the day one of the dogs bent a fence almost completely open, as he was barking at me.<br />
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Generally, I adore dogs of all breeds ...It's just badly trained dogs and their dumbshit owners I can't stand.<br />
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So today I get up to take the trash out. But maybe I should have seen a mirror before I did that?<br />
<br />
I was still in my pajamas, my hair was a wreck, and because the ground is still damp, I walked out in pink with blue polka-dotted galoshes. All I was missing was a pair of goggles and a fanny pack, and my Crazy Nut Freak costume would have been complete. Considering where this story is going, I can't decide if my Saturday Morning Cartoons attire works to my benefit or not.<br />
<br />
So I head outside, feeling purdy an like I looks guuuud, and I put the trash into the trash bin. A novel concept really. Keeping trash inside of a trash can, it's a shame not many people here believe in not polluting.<br />
<br />
Suddenly, the three dogs all zip out, bending the fences and barking like mad. And let me say that there's nothing quite like an early morning heart attack to start the day right. The tallest of the dogs at four feet in length, starts using his paws to leverage himself up, and he almost succeeds in climbing the damn fence for the <b><u><i>second</i></u></b> time since it was installed.<br />
<br />
I don't know. Maybe fear brings out the worst in me. Fear and stress. Usually I either race back inside the house or I try using a few dog calls I learned in Kindergarten. Things like "sit" and "nice doggie" but instead of my usual polite fear, I took a deep breath, and released a very loud and commanding.....<br />
<br />
<span style="color: blue; font-size: x-large;"><b>SHUT THE FUCK UP!!!</b></span><br />
<br />
All three dogs went "<span style="color: magenta; font-size: xx-small;">Yipe!!</span>" and ran straight to their equally frightened owners.<br />
<br />
With that I slammed the gate shut, erroneously thinking that this mess was done for today. When suddenly a group of kids start poking the fence, with one being so brave as to try and jump it.<br />
<br />
"<b><span style="color: red;">HEY!! I can see yew. I heard yew scream shut the fack up. It's not funny.</span></b>"<br />
<br />
I don't know why they do this, but my neighbors and their kids speak with a very fake Virginia-New Jersey accent. It's probably the most annoying, self-racist, fake accent a person of Caucasian descent could have. What bothers me the most is that the entire lot of them were born and raised in Illinois and Indiana, and have boasted openly before about never even having traveled as far as (and I quote) "the far away country of Minnesota" so where did these accents come from??<br />
<br />
Worse? You can hear them trying to have a "Chi-KAH-go" accent underneath. Want to see someone have a jaw workout? Ask them to say "milk". The fake Jerseyginia accent fights with the "Kahgo" one, producing the word "Mwaaaaaaaaahlk", it's rather hilarious to see them make a fool of themselves with dairy product.<br />
<br />
Whatever. I see the kids poking and hanging on my fence.<br />
<br />
So I storm over to the fence and rip the door open. "<span style="color: blue;"><b>What you say to me BOY??</b>"</span><br />
<br />
The children hop onto scooters and the Bud Bike, and start speeding. I turn the corner, just as they make it halfway down the alley, only for them to stop, and check to see if I'm still back here.<br />
<br />
"<b><span style="color: blue;">KEEP runnin' BOY!!</span></b>" I boom. I am in no mood for this.<br />
<br />
The children speed off.<br />
<br />
Suddenly, all of the other Squidbillies pop over to bat at the fences. Here's a good shot of where this is going, I'll let you decide which one is me:<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEix9R6Ir_6g0DORG9I9nLtPzPrOXojmeOuFnCJD_TBLUbo71QfBu4C2yM4CTE5NYSop5QCGL_A1lWqImDdcH2ZDTDSbNXTUIKpojZbBGp_aYqlrLwCKKv9Rdk0yUqvo_l86KkcVAmieJt8r/s1600/images.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="271" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEix9R6Ir_6g0DORG9I9nLtPzPrOXojmeOuFnCJD_TBLUbo71QfBu4C2yM4CTE5NYSop5QCGL_A1lWqImDdcH2ZDTDSbNXTUIKpojZbBGp_aYqlrLwCKKv9Rdk0yUqvo_l86KkcVAmieJt8r/s400/images.jpg" width="400" /></a></div>
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"Excuse you, what is yer problem?" Says a fat woman in a hoodie, hot pants, greasy hair, an ankle tattoo of a melted butterfly and no shoes, with again, a very fake and self-racist accent.</div>
<br />
"<b><span style="color: blue;">Those kids were on my property!</span></b>" I snap. I've learned that small words work best, but "property" is one of a handful of large words they seem to understand.<br />
<br />
"<b><span style="color: red;">They only did that because you were being mean to to these poor, defenseless dogs! You deserve it!</span></b>" As she's reading me the Peta act, the dog jumps the fence and starts barking too loud for me to hear her. Soon the other over 30 year olds start barking with the dogs, so without hesitation, I bellow:<br />
<span style="color: blue;"><br /></span>
<b><span style="color: blue; font-size: x-large;">SHUT THE MUTHAFUCKIN' HELL UP!!</span></b><br />
<br />
Two dogs bow their heads in shame, one runs to his porch and barks from there. In the distance, I spot two very small children, looking to their elder siblings, and in baby voices I hear "<span style="color: #8e7cc3;">Fuck? Fuck? Fuck? Fuck! Fuck!! Fuck Fuck!! Motha Fuck!!</span>" in a Jay and Silent Bob approved moment, while another child from across the street yells "<b><span style="color: #b4a7d6;">HEY!! I didn't know Madea lived here?</span></b>" I have been told that when I am pissed, I tend to sound like I belong on BET.<br />
<br />
So of course I got the "you've got some nerve" speech, which is followed by another neighbor, Butterball.<br />
<br />
Butterball, all 5'7 and 479 lbs. of him, comes out in a stained wifebeater and Old Navy shorts. Why he just has to have his two cents wafting in my direction too.<br />
<br />
"<b><span style="color: red;">Do yew even understand mah dwogs?</span></b>" He says in a threatening tone.<br />
<br />
"<b><span style="color: blue;">Apparently not, sir. Otherwise I wouldn't be screaming at them to shut the fuck up!!</span></b>"<br />
<br />
Lemme ask you if this argument sounds familiar? "<b><span style="color: red;">These dogs is trained to protect our property, so when they see a burglur, they is trained tew bark real loud to scare away IN-trudurs.</span></b>" And yes folks, he said that as though somewhere exists a group of <u>out</u>-truders.<br />
<br />
"<b><span style="color: blue;">I'm not on your fucking property!! I'm on MY property, taking out MY trash into MY can!!</span></b>" I seriously can't believe he tried the "protecting my property" speech on me.<br />
<br />
"<b><span style="color: red;">Well they saw yew, and YEW scared 'em, and they was thinklin' yer probably gonna steal from MAH house!!</span></b>"<br />
<br />
By the way, he's three houses down from me. So there's enough of a distance to fit two to three cars from where my footses were placed, to his fence.<br />
<br />
"<b><span style="color: blue;">FROM HERE????</span> *</b><span style="color: magenta;">stamps feet</span><b>* <span style="color: blue;">FROM HEEEEEEEEEEERE??? I'm a good several feet from your property, how the fuck am I supposed to steal diddly SHIT from your house, when I am three cars away???</span></b><span style="color: blue;">"</span><br />
<br />
He stood there for a while, trying to contemplate the spacial distance between my feet and his dog, when joining the party was the mother of Budweiser Boy.<br />
<br />
"<b><span style="color: red;">Heyyyy!! Were you the one yellin' up at mah kiyeds?</span></b>" growls a woman with clear skin damage from years of tanning. Matted blonde hair, blue raccoon makeup, gruff smoker's voice, crop top, hot pants, barefoot with a tramp stamp and a beer bottle in one hand, and a cigarette in the other. Perfect. "<b><span style="color: red;">How dare yew yell at mah little angels!</span></b>"<br />
<br />
"<b><span style="color: blue;">Are you their mother?</span></b>" I yell with a slightly delirious twinge of hope in my vocal chords.<br />
<br />
"<b><span style="color: red;">Why yes ah ahyum!</span></b>"<br />
<br />
"<span style="color: blue; font-weight: bold;">GOOD! Your little crotch rockets have been on my property many times, along with *</span><span style="color: magenta;">pointing behind me</span><span style="color: blue; font-weight: bold;">* those little FREAKS across the street!!</span>" Which is true. <a href="http://codenamesailorearth.blogspot.com/2012/11/quit-sending-your-kids-into-my-yard.html" target="_blank">I've caught these kids before</a>, sprawled out over my front lawn, playing in the bushes, setting off firecrackers and drinking their parents' beer. The ones across the street have even toked outside my window, stealing pot from their older brothers. Why the cops refuse to do something about it, I have no idea, but it's a sad, sorry and frightening sight to see a couple of 6-8 year olds getting high.<br />
<br />
"<b><span style="color: red;">Mah angels have dun nuffin wrong, they gots every right to do whut they want, an' if this is how yew act then you deserve it.</span></b>"<br />
<br />
Seeing no end to the parade of stupidity before me, I decided to do what my mother told me to do as a child.<br />
<br />
Tell the truth.<br />
<br />
"<b><span style="color: blue;">REALLY? You think so? Well here's a news flash for ya. My fence has rusted nails sticking out all over, there's dangerous shit falling from the house into my lawn, and in a couple of months, this whole thing is going to be torn down. Pardon the FUCK out of me if I don't want your little bar room accidents getting TETANUS!!</span></b>"<br />
<br />
Now like I said, small words work, and telling the truth is a good thing. Because when I said the word "tetanus" Butterball straightened up, and tallied up the cost in his head for medical treatments for each kid, in case they got the terrible disease.<br />
<br />
"<span style="color: red; font-size: xx-small;"><b>Yes ma'am, I'll do something about the dogs and make sure the kids stay away from your house.</b></span>" His fake accent was almost totally gone. His shoulders dropped, and he motioned for his kids to move to the front of the property. He told the other neighbors that tetanus was a scary disease that causes your young ones to "grow mutant legs". Of course that's not what the disease can do, but if it prompts these people to ditch the fake accents and curb their kids and animals, then that's all that counts.<br />
<br />
I offered an apology for yelling, in the exchange that they re-train the dogs and keep the kids OFF my property. I got a half assed "the dogs are really friendly" comment, with an added "well um um.. I'm friends with yer FAAAAThur" as if that was supposed to sound intimidating. But when they saw that wasn't going to scare me, the three sets motioned for the dogs to come back inside.<br />
<br />
As I sat down to tell this story, I heard three more children walking past my house:<br />
<br />
"<b><span style="color: red;">HEY!! You don't wanna go near there. There's a wicked witch inside the house!! She'll turn your dog into a pussycat if you bother her.</span></b>"<br />
<br />
Damn straight.<br />
<br />
<b>UPDATE:</b> I couldn't sleep after sharing my story with the world. There were two things bothering me about this episode.<br />
<br />
For starters, the fat Peta bitch in the hoodie. She got on me for being "mean" to her "poor defenseless dogs" and yet in the very next breath, she and the other clowns were talking about how they had raised these dogs to protect their property. These are attack dogs, trained to attack, yet they are living in the same homes as children.<br />
<br />
Which is it? Is he a poor, defenseless puppy, or is he your weapon ~ or rather ~ your shield? Can you really read me the Peta riot after you've bred a dog to kill? And where the hell have you lived where you feel you "need" a dog to "protect" you?? If things are so bad that you feel you need to train an animal to kill, maybe you should <b><i><u>MOVE</u></i></b>.<br />
<br />
The second thing is the children. Not one of them was above the age of eight, yet as I've said before, one had a Budweiser strapped to his bike, and the lot of them have been on my property before, shooting firecrackers while getting drunk and high.<br />
<br />
If Junior is at a level where at the second grade, he's already toking, drinking and setting things on FIRE, I doubt very highly that my fowl language is the worst thing that can happen to him. I'm pretty sure we've reached the end of the line on how low this kid is going in life.<br />
<br />
And what kind of a cop would openly see children engaging in pot and beer, and opt to do nothing about it?? My local law enforcers have been witness to this and still choose to do nothing about it. If I was a cop, and I saw Junior with a Bud strapped to his lil' bicycle, I'd pull him over, maybe have a chat with his mom and dad.<br />
<br />
But the violent dogs and drug abusing children weren't what was the "problem" to these people in the alley. The fact that I yelled a bad word was. That scares me. Look, I know you're proud of your straight D- education, but since when is my saying "fuck" somehow worse than your 6-8 year olds getting high and drunk?<br />
<br />
I wonder if any of this wound up on camera?Koriander ~ Codename Sailor Earthhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01418462915907400047noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-354705414086327818.post-61885240291604639502013-04-18T18:10:00.002-05:002013-04-18T18:10:49.411-05:00Application for a mopHave you ever heard the phrase "when it rains it pours"? WELL this is what they were talking about.<br />
<br />
So the other day, I woke up to the news that my house is going for Sheriff's auction in June, so I need to figure out how to be GONE by then. Awesome. The lawyer bought us until the first week of June.. and that's about all he's done. Lovely.<br />
<br />
So I had a day and a half straight of listening to my parents kvetch. My mom is trying to figure out why nobody has gotten off their ass long enough to hire either of us long enough to pay for this move, and my father has regressed into re-denial about their divorce.<br />
<br />
He spent several hours boasting about the leftover garbage he found at garage sales while pausing every few minutes to tell me how "I had better" get rid of everything I own, because my owning more than a handful of clothes and a bed is somehow a burden on him. This is the same clown who does not live with me AT ALL, yet has an apartment under my living area, where he lives alone as a hoarder. Go figure.<br />
<br />
His batshit girlfriend Maryse also took time out of her busy day to phone him and tell him what a horrible human being I must be, because I don't go Smurf shopping with her. I am not kidding. She said (and I quote) that "<span style="color: blue; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><i>Smurfs are a part of my soul, because they understand French children, so I must become one with them.</i></span>" She just spent $100 on the long recalled Smurfs cereal. The one from the 80's that pretty much made kids poop a Smurf. I shouldn't be surprised, since this is the same psycho <a href="http://codenamesailorearth.blogspot.com/2012/11/rip-charles-dehitler-cat-or-run-for.html" target="_blank">I've blogged about before</a> who spent $500 to bring a stray Hitler cat from Japan to America. She also performs "spells" and is still allowed around small children as a teacher.<br />
<br />
By the way, Charles was spotted a month ago on the side of the highway, still very sick, but ran before he could be captured. This cat has legit died more times than those 9 lives allot.<br />
<br />
Yesterday I was in a rotten mood. I couldn't handle anybody's bullshit when I couldn't even handle my own life. Surely, it can't get any-<br />
<br />
<b><span style="font-size: x-large;">*CRACK BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM*</span></b><br />
<br />
Ah. Shame on me for even thinking that sentence.<br />
<br />
Now, I live pretty close to the Calumet River. In fact I have to walk over it to get groceries. A little background here.<br />
<br />
Before I moved to this lovely suburb in Hell, the city had decided to drill into the cement and add drains and dips all over the surrounding area. Why? "To defer flood waters" was the shameless excuse everyone was given.<br />
<br />
Now before the drains were put in, the waters from the "Lil Cal" would wash through the streets, causing a lovely annoyance to people, but would subside on their own.<br />
<br />
Now? Well thanks to the pipes, drains and dips all over my town and the town next to it, all that lovely, sewage filled water now backs up into my house, my neighbors' houses, and makes for a stinky swimming pool right by the shopping center. In fact, here's a shot of my local shopping center, courtesy of NBC 5:<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhqi3_d7Zpx_ke3R_23898KCX5Iiw7ftBAiBlf09m8s2FSiPy4O4JoyhGbXFfOCRLq95SOlLl0KYrxza-OYDOuRUjiE20B_E4u1Kls1XbzcZQXXJ7xdCcQxNFo1jiDB1M5LrWH5ED-6Pg6S/s1600/munster.gif" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="265" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhqi3_d7Zpx_ke3R_23898KCX5Iiw7ftBAiBlf09m8s2FSiPy4O4JoyhGbXFfOCRLq95SOlLl0KYrxza-OYDOuRUjiE20B_E4u1Kls1XbzcZQXXJ7xdCcQxNFo1jiDB1M5LrWH5ED-6Pg6S/s400/munster.gif" width="400" /></a></div>
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Now after this was taken in 2008, and they started evacuating people by boat from the clinic (upper left corner) it took until last week to finish repairing all of the damages. Renovations on the Taco Bell (center) just wrapped up last week.</div>
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Guess what happened overnight?</div>
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Well it hasn't gotten this bad YET, but as my neighbor from across the street was bailing out his "downstairs lab" (Dear Jebus I can't move fast enough) he suggested calling the Calumet Trustee's office for aid.</div>
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So my mother did just that. This is what happened:</div>
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Mama: Ah hello? Is this the Calumet Trustee office for disaster relief?<br />Lady: What's your issue, honey?<br />Mama: Well my basement's flooded and my neighbors are trying to bail out their homes. The Little Calumet is still rising, and after the rains everyone is flooding. What sort of disaster relief funds may I apply for?<br />Lady: *Sucks in air* Ooooh yeah um... I dunnoooooooooooooooo what you mean by disaster fundage or anything. But we don't do that. Our aid is not monitary, m'kay?<br />Mama: Ah... I beg your pardon? I do not think I understand.<br />Lady: Well do you live in MUNSTER?? (She says with venom in her voice)<br />Mama: No.<br />Lady: Ah okay that's fine then.<br />Mama: See what happened was-<br />Lady: AREYOUSUREYOUDONTLIVEINMUNSTER??<br />Mama: Yes yes! I don't live in Munster.<br />Lady: Ah good... good.......................................</div>
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Mama: So as I was saying-</div>
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Lady: ARYSHUREYUDINTLIFINMINSTR!!</div>
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Mama: For the last time I don't live in Munster, okay??<br />Lady: Well GOOD then.<br />Mama: Anyway, we're all flooding right now, what kind of emergency aid are my neighbors and I entitled to?</div>
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Lady: Well we don't exactly have any financial aaaaaaaid.<br />Mama: Um...<br />Lady: See what we can do is we can send each of you a form. You fill out the form and send it back to us, and if we approve you... we will send you a free mop and bucket.<br />Mama:.... I'm sorry say that again?<br />Lady: Now that's only <u><b>IF</b></u> you get approved. We have a process here. But → <b><u>IF</u></b> ← you are approved, we will send you a free mop and bucket.</div>
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When my mother recounted this story earlier today, my brother screamed "IT'S NOT POT, IT'S A FUCKING BUCKET!!" Alluding to the fact that it's actually quicker to obtain pot in the state of Indiana than it is to obtain a "free" mop and bucket.</div>
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And this isn't even a fancy mop and bucket either. This is one of those cheap, plastic $4 sets you find in every old person's home. <i>It's not even a <span style="color: #38761d;">Swiffer</span></i>.</div>
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Of the many types of Government aids out there, I never thought that they had such a strenuous process for a mop and bucket.</div>
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Dare I ask what would disqualify me from the process of gaining this mop and bucket?</div>
Koriander ~ Codename Sailor Earthhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01418462915907400047noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-354705414086327818.post-57262122154211588142013-04-11T19:07:00.000-05:002013-04-11T22:33:00.252-05:00Tumblr thinks harassment is cool<div style="text-align: center;">
I got an email yesterday from a friend of mine on YouTube, who told me that there were total strangers posting hateful things about her on Tumblr. These are people she's never spoken to before and didn't know existed, until the hate started going viral.</div>
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I got onto the Tumblr page and found they were also stalking another friend of mine, without her knowledge.</div>
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The page also has people jumping on there, telling other Tumblr users as young as 13, that they "need to" and "had better" kill themselves.</div>
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<br /></div>
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Why did these Tumblrs want my two friends and these teenagers to kill themselves? </div>
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Because these butthurt wastes of life (The Tumblr trolls) hated that my two friends made some cool CGI videos, using a freeware called MikuMikuDance. </div>
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Yeah for real. Videos of CGI girls dancing makes trolls wish you were dead.</div>
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And I should know, I love that software.</div>
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But after I started getting "not too bad" with it in 2010-11, a bunch of strangers went after me, hacked me, posted a hate shrine against me on ED, stalked me, stalked my family, sent me death threats and even hacked my Facebook, so they could tag my entire friends and family in sick porn pictures in my name.</div>
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I've been where my friends have been before, with sick bastards trying to ruin my life.</div>
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So I went ahead and used Tumblr's "contact us" feature to report the two Tumblr pages.</div>
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This is what "Danii" from Tumblr support says:</div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi4vBU6xErNU-oJfLuwtgUAcSvvE21sUKKUTR35LP0FqmS0rofd4IACNpULL-n_Q7raSh5CjarFBDzWs4oX3dDtbXuYLRpxY72mbLu3Wx9mqfY60BJCWpdXeByRzZjsoRYdn6oxVxMrJ1pC/s1600/FUTumblr.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="165" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi4vBU6xErNU-oJfLuwtgUAcSvvE21sUKKUTR35LP0FqmS0rofd4IACNpULL-n_Q7raSh5CjarFBDzWs4oX3dDtbXuYLRpxY72mbLu3Wx9mqfY60BJCWpdXeByRzZjsoRYdn6oxVxMrJ1pC/s400/FUTumblr.JPG" width="400" /></a></div>
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<table cellpadding="0" class="ajC"><tbody>
<tr class="UszGxc ajv"><td class="gG" colspan="2"><span class="gI"><b>from:</b></span></td><td class="gL" colspan="2"><span class="gI"> <span class="gD" email="support@tumblr.com" name="Tumblr Support">Tumblr Support</span> <span class="go"><support tumblr.com=""></support></span> </span></td></tr>
<tr class="ajv"><td class="gG" colspan="2"><span class="gI"><b>reply-to:</b></span></td><td class="gL" colspan="2"><span class="gI"> <span email="support@tumblr.com">Tumblr Support <support tumblr.com=""> </support></span></span></td></tr>
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<strong>Danii</strong> (Tumblr Support) </div>
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Apr 10 08:29 pm (EDT) </div>
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We realize this content may be very upsetting. However, sometimes content posted by a blogger may be mean-spirited or upsetting but does not violate the law. In order to maintain freedom of expression, we won't remove that material right now. </div>
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I strongly suggest you add that user to your Ignore list at <a href="http://tumblr.com/ignore" target="_blank">http://tumblr.com/ignore</a>. This way, the blogger can't see your posts on his/her Dashboard, and you won't see the blogger listed in post notes or Dashboard notifications. You also won't get Asks or Fan Mail from users you've ignored. </div>
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Keep in mind that we don’t notify bloggers that you’ve ignored them, although they may realize it once they stop hearing from you altogether. </div>
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Thank you for taking the time to share your concern with us. </div>
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--<br />
Tumblr Support<br />
<a href="mailto:support@tumblr.com" target="_blank">support@tumblr.com</a></div>
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No, Danii. This is NOT acceptable. You have failed to do your job.</div>
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The TOS agreement for Tumblr expressly says that you are not to use the site to harass, belittle or post hate against anybody for any reason. Yet that is just what these people have done.</div>
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And yet the Tumblr team didn't think that this was worth their time. </div>
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That it's "freedom of expression" for total strangers to name-call and ask people to kill themselves.... over a CGI.</div>
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This complacent attitude, when suicides are on the rise due to cyber stalking and harassment, is NOT acceptable.</div>
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What would it take, Danii? A few more suicides from the harassment? A lawsuit against Tumblr? Would you like it if people trolled you like this? </div>
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How much is too much?</div>
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At what point as a society did we start to mollycoddle and accept stalking, slander, harassment and threats as "innocent bullying"? </div>
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This is as bad as when a cop ignores a spouse who's been beaten, and says 'Meh, domestic dispute" and refuses to take into custody the criminal.</div>
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Should I be surprised? After all, we have so many news stations, cheering rapists and lamenting over their spoiled careers while at the same time, shaming rape victims and making it out like the attack is all their fault. If this is how our society treats violent, even deadly crimes, I shouldn't be surprised when a company like Tumblr openly supports cyber harassment.</div>
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We are in a society that accepts people being bullied as "Well you better learn how to deal with it, ya PANSY!" when strangers are spreading rumors and being malicious to people they have never met.</div>
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Enough.</div>
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I hereby urge people to drop Tumblr like the bad habit it is. If you have tweens/teens order them to do the same.</div>
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Flood their inbox with your concern over this blind acceptance of hate. </div>
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We need to make a change.</div>
Koriander ~ Codename Sailor Earthhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01418462915907400047noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-354705414086327818.post-33937248400990416652013-04-06T01:14:00.002-05:002013-04-06T01:14:40.129-05:00Lucy84 and the phone more important than her children<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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One day when I am a mother, if for ANY reason you see me being so negligent as to pay more attention to a cell phone than my children, I want you to pinch me in the arm as hard as you can, and scream bloody murder, until I stop being stupid and attend to the kids.<br />
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Before I get to today's blog, I love wrestling. There is no better way to close a day like this, than to hear about EVOLVE crowning their first champion (AR Fox), Ring of Honor crowning a new champion (Jay Briscoe) and the Hall of Fame featuring ALL 6 entrants properly on TV this year.<br />
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I needed to get a prescription today. Only my closest friends/family get to know why, but suffice to say that $106 is too expensive for freaking prescription strength Benadryl. >_O<br />
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So anyway, I ventured to Target, hoping to save a few dollars on the prescription. Ha ha ha.<br />
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Now Target is much closer to my house than Wal*Mart, but still about a mile east. I have no car, so this means I had to walk.<br />
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As I'm walking, I'm getting honked at, and getting laughed at, there are fully grown adults ~ half of them senior citizens ~ making fun of me. How dare I clutter up THEIR lovely streets by walking? And with a tiny cart no less?<br />
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Oh, and I dare to pay for broccoli with a food stamp card? Well obviously I must be a degenerate. So I deserve to have the cashier roll her eyes at my mom and I, and call me a "loser bitch" under her breath. Obviously, I should be shot.<br />
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By the way, if you for one single, solitary moment, want to pretend that people without a car or on food stamps are "welfare whores" and that I'm somehow a "loser" for fitting this category, because I'm earning less than a living wage at what I do, I implore you. Please, try and go through the Indiana SNAP process yourself, and tell me how "easy" it is. When you're done crying like a bitch at how many officers call you a whore, loser, possible drug addict and a drain on our society, you may come back and comment on this blog. Please try it keyboard jocks. And while you're at it, try getting a job at McDonald's without a college degree. I want to hear how "easy" it is for you. Please include a scan of your 2013 McDonald's name tag as proof of what you accomplished today. And don't forget the lid on my Coke. <span style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;">╭∩╮*^_^*╭∩╮</span><br />
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I take a sip at the water fountain before heading to the Rx counter. There are TWO water fountains, spaced pretty well apart.<br />
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There's a dude behind me, who sees me taking a drink. He has the opportunity to use the other fountain. It's a mere 15 inch difference.<br />
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Instead, he stands behind me, sighing heavily and gets frustrated. I move, and then he touches the fountain, and then wipes his hands real quick, looking at my face, and then looking at his hands in wonderment. No dude, my skin color won't rub off on you. Thanks for asking. I swear, between Target and Facebook, I wonder if I've gone back to the mid 1960's. There's more racism now than ever.<br />
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While waiting in line as "Ashley" very slowly decided to roll lazily along the counter, I found myself standing behind a woman, who should have had her tubes tied during puberty.<br />
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I saw the woman's cell phone long enough to know her screen name is Lucy84. So that's how I will refer to her for the duration of this story.<br />
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Lucy84 has two children. They are wearing normal clothes, while she is wearing the latest fashion trend. I noticed a ton of other moms doing the same thing. They're dressed like they're about to go clubbing, while their husbands and children are dressed by <i>Le Boutique De Goodwill</i>. Funny that.<br />
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The one child is hanging off the cart like a monkey. Other people are slamming into his little face, and nobody is caring to notice that. But he seems fine being slapped about by so many shopping carts, and his mom doesn't care.<br />
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The other child is very small, but she looks about 4 or 5 ish. She is sitting in the cart, less than a full 2 inches from her mother's face. Please keep that in mind.<br />
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Lucy84 is very slowly, lazily, playing with her cell phone. She makes short calls, but spends most of her time here, blogging about floral print bags and how annoying her kids are. I wouldn't know, except she has a large phone, so you can read the damn thing from an aisle away.<br />
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The daughter starts screeching. "MOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOMMY I WANNA GOOO I WANNA GO LET'S GO MOOOOOVE ALREADY!!!!"<br />
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Now the child doesn't seem to be upset. She's doing that thing where she just wants attention. Lucy84 doesn't seem to notice, she just keeps playing with her phone.<br />
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"MOMMOMMOM MOMMYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY I WANNA GO LET'S GO I WANNA GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO"<br />
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The boy child, who can't be older than maybe 7, appears to be the responsible person in this triad. He looks up at Lucy84 and says "Hey mother? I believe she's trying to get your attention. Mother? She really needs you to pay attention."<br />
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Lucy84 is ignoring both of them now.<br />
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The son rolls his eyes, and decides to let nature take it's course.<br />
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"MOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOMMYYYYY" hollers the girl who is nearly in tears. Still, Lucy84 does not budge. There's less than 3 inches between Lucy84 and the girl, it's not like she's out of reach here. How hard is it to tend to a child these days??<br />
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The daughter stands in the cart and grabs Lucy84 by the face. "MOM!! I want to go NOW!!"<br />
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Shockingly? Lucy84 doesn't even acknowledge this! I don't hear a peep out of her, except for the constant "pop pop pop" of her fingers against the touch screen.<br />
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Furious. the little girl sits in the cart again and screams.<br />
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"MOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOMMY C'MON ALREADY I WANNA GO LET'S GO LET'S GO LET'S GO I WANNA GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!"<br />
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Lucy84 stops blogging long enough to snap the phone up, and in a whisper, tell the two children "Now really, this behavior is not conducive to what we agreed to int he car! You both must stop right now."<br />
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With that, Lucy84 returns to blogging. Both children cock their heads slightly, as if to mentally say "My mom is an idiot."<br />
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Dropped off the prescription. "Ashley" insisted that it would be done in 30 minutes.<br />
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... Well an hour and a half later, the prescription isn't even half done. I can't imagine to what ends of the Earth Ashley had gone to in order to obtain the medical grade Benadryl, but apparently I wasn't alone. Lucy84 was back, still waiting for her prescription.<br />
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The daughter is still agitated. "WHY ARE WE BACK HERE MOM LET'S GO I WANNA LEAVE I DON'T LIKE THIS PLACE I WANNA GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" She's kicking her legs and giving everyone a headache.<br />
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What does Lucy84 do? Fire up Angry Birds and play by herself of course.<br />
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The daughter starts poking her arm. Lucy84 just swats her away. "Not NOW I'm busy. You are going to make me mess up my high score. Just shut up, gawd." She groans quietly.<br />
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As the girl starts screaming again, my mother asks Ashley what is taking the prescription so long. "Like wooooooooooooooooooooow man it'll like totally be another couple minutes. ah'kaaaay?" Um, no Ashley, it's not okay. Especially not when I can see the box of medication behind you. Freaking do your JOB.<br />
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"Oh woooooooooooooooow are you like... over 18 and stuff? 'Cause you know like Benadryl ... is like totally medicine and whatnot."<br />
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Have you been snorting it??? Dear God woman, get up and fill the damn bottle already!!<br />
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Ashley asks repeatedly who this is for. I am seriously wondering how this moron got a job. She's rolling on the counter in a lucid state, and doesn't seem able to fill a bottle on time.<br />
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Finally, Ashley hands me my prescription..... written out to "Alexander" Ake. REALLY??? How hard is it to spell "Koriander"??? That's just belligerence. >_O<br />
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All the way to the parking lot, I can hear the little girl screaming. Lucy84 never once puts down her cell phone as she pushes the cart. Finally, she stops pushing (in the middle of the street I might add) to stamp her feet and say "UGH! Just why can't you let Mommy focus for one minute on what's important??"<br />
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Um... Lucy84... let me be clear... your KIDS are what's important!! You remember them, don't you? Sure you do! The gangly little monkys you gave birth to, who've bee trying to grab your attention all damn day??<br />
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Not your cell phone, not your blog, and sure as hell not Angry Birds. Puddown the phone and tend to your kids!!<br />
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If ever you catch Lucy84 in her light grey hoodie and sparkly jeans, ignoring her children for Angry Birds, please do me a favor. Punch her in the right breast ~ right on the side by her arm. That way, she won't be able to tweet about the pain, and maybe, juuuust maybe, her kids can have their mom back.Koriander ~ Codename Sailor Earthhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01418462915907400047noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-354705414086327818.post-51904358464126434112013-04-04T00:01:00.001-05:002013-04-05T17:30:34.644-05:00Mick Foley & Bob Backlund bumped OFF of TV? APOLOGIZE!! (UPDATED APRIL 5TH!!)<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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I heard the rumors for two days, but I was really hoping they were just that, rumors.<br />
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But as it turns out, they were 100% true, as confirmed by Mick Foley via Twitter this afternoon, that his speech was being cut from the televised broadcast of the WWE Hall of Fame.<br />
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At the same time, I discovered that Bob Backlund's speech was also being cut.<br />
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This injustice had to be corrected. So I created a C.M. Punk "Apologize" meme, and got it sent to Mick and to the world right away.<br />
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What I never expected was the immediate and positive reaction I got, not just from Mick Foley, but from the entire wrestling community, and dare I say it? The WWE Universe. I'll let my Twitter feed speak for itself, be sure to give everyone listed a shoutout on Twitter if you can:<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgSduFV9kjnkSpJlE6iGE8ebzaVjF6178lE8W8I6dbWhEW2eiyGCJBdG1jCscr_VKcvzsbpiIm4D9hii_0cGtDT9ANwKIeUyrJQDquhcpuzixKHJhdKJAeA-_F7gY7Zn7zcOmwLJxk8cK6i/s1600/Tweets4Mick-7.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="80" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgSduFV9kjnkSpJlE6iGE8ebzaVjF6178lE8W8I6dbWhEW2eiyGCJBdG1jCscr_VKcvzsbpiIm4D9hii_0cGtDT9ANwKIeUyrJQDquhcpuzixKHJhdKJAeA-_F7gY7Zn7zcOmwLJxk8cK6i/s320/Tweets4Mick-7.JPG" width="320" /></a></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjgdnERX5SCn58XqZQ2Bw5nv8UrrQjiA12-GixVMvPocUZnHcAzwScXIiVJY4AeVNeMz1ci9qExXA4GBYo0J0OEmhZ7U2gnL-5ae6ZMIxoi0cLr5I_MVg9gWSbmmZeOag7dSR0nkoCR466b/s1600/MICK_10172005jg_180_433825a.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjgdnERX5SCn58XqZQ2Bw5nv8UrrQjiA12-GixVMvPocUZnHcAzwScXIiVJY4AeVNeMz1ci9qExXA4GBYo0J0OEmhZ7U2gnL-5ae6ZMIxoi0cLr5I_MVg9gWSbmmZeOag7dSR0nkoCR466b/s200/MICK_10172005jg_180_433825a.jpg" width="143" /></a>Obviously, these fans love professional wrestling, but more to the point, they love and respect Bob Backlund and Mick Foley.</div>
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi-9eBPpLa-hujDs38zbOLqIOEd3rOppIj_EmvbugNvIgRTGtmunurUJdrWq2G2gVncqxWD5Aeu3qJ1BYqRNLmeukvl81OiJJopMsMnu3jPMG4PcDYrIkt_sWXBbBsPqUr83nEHadtoi8jD/s1600/backlund-bob06.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi-9eBPpLa-hujDs38zbOLqIOEd3rOppIj_EmvbugNvIgRTGtmunurUJdrWq2G2gVncqxWD5Aeu3qJ1BYqRNLmeukvl81OiJJopMsMnu3jPMG4PcDYrIkt_sWXBbBsPqUr83nEHadtoi8jD/s200/backlund-bob06.jpg" width="113" /></a><br />
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Mick Foley has always been one of the WWE's most enthusiastic supporters, very rarely calling out questionable decisions, choosing only to do so when it's fair. His characters have always brought about the best when it comes to both action and storytelling, and his ability to write compelling books on his own has done much to take down the stereotype of the "dumb wrestler". His unique take on hardcore wrestling has inspired new wrestlers to pick up where he left off, but with a more educated and cautious flair. The Attitude Era would never have gotten to be nearly as popular without the ECW alumni.<br />
<br />
Bob Backlund put technical grappling front and center in the spotlight during his heyday. He knew he wasn't as flashy as Superstar Billy Graham or as muscular as Bruno Sammartino, and he used that less as a disadvantage and more as an excuse to do twice as much in the ring as others his own size. Wrestling fans in the 1970's took note of that, and by staying focused on wrestling itself, he created a legacy that has since paved the way for other technical grapplers like William Regal, Dean Malenko and Bryan Danielson.<br />
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Even non-WWE fans and non-Wrestling fans know who these two are. They are an important part of the WWE's legacy, and neither man should be cut down for a washed up reality star like Donald Trump.<br />
<br />
No offense to the multiple time bankrupted celebrity, but his dealings with the WWE have been few and far between, being relegated to the same Wrestlemania guest appearance spots in the 1980's as Liberace.<br />
<br />
The fact that it's Trump taking up most of the time is what's hurting and angering the WWE Universe the most. Not only has he not contributed more than a few spot payments to Vince McMahon in the 80's, and a sad Hair vs. Hair match a few scant years ago, he's done much to downplay his relationship with the McMahons, while Backlund and Foley have bled for Vince McMahon ~ literally. The two have sacrificed time with their loved ones, sacrificed their health and well being, if only to entertain the audience at home and abroad.<br />
<br />
Vince McMahon has always bent over backwards to try and please Donald Trump, eager to be accepted by a celebrity he looks up to as a brother. In return, Trump has done a fair job of putting him down, snubbing him, but taking him for all he's worth anyway.<br />
<br />
On the flip-side Foley and Backlund have allowed the WWE to profit from their battered bodies and image in the form of T-Shirts, DVDs, VHS tapes, Blu-Ray, action figures, and a wide array of other products, garnering profit for the McMahon name. Even when not in the company, they have both continued to offer praise to the WWE and help them stay fresh in the minds of even the most casual wrestling fan.<br />
<br />
And in turn, the fans want better, <a href="http://angrymarks.com/?ArticleID=24520" target="_blank">as reported by The Angry Marks Network</a> today.<br />
<br />
Many people within the WWE Universe have already voiced their grievances to <a href="https://twitter.com/vincemcmahon" target="_blank">Vince McMahon's Twitter account</a>, and many more will be doing it in person at the Fan Axxes events this weekend.<br />
<br />
Certainly, this is as good a time as any to make your voice heard. Let's remind the WWE that it's folly to cut Foley and Backlund from the USA broadcast.<br />
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<b><u><span style="color: red; font-size: x-large;">UPDATE:</span></u></b><br />
<br />
Just saw some great news from <a href="https://www.facebook.com/RealMickFoley" target="_blank">Mick Foley's Facebook</a>:<br />
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<span style="color: #274e13;">SANTA SAVES HALL OF FAME FOR FOLEY!</span></div>
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<span style="color: #274e13;">Sources tell us that a last minute deal brokered between Santa Claus and WWE owner Vincent McMahon have saved what could have been an ugly incident at Saturdays Hall of Fame induction ceremony. Santa broke the news on his official Twitter site @SantaClausWay, tweeting, "don't worry <a href="https://twitter.com/realmickfoley" target="_blank">@RealMickFoley</a>. I had a nice talk with <a href="https://twitter.com/VinceMcMahon" target="_blank">@VinceMcMahon</a> and your #WWEHOF speech WILL be televised."</span></div>
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<span style="color: #274e13;">Foley was said to be so happy that he jumped for joy, before realizing that his arthritic knees no longer allow him to jump, causing him to crumble clumsily into a hot dog cart in Times Square. Helpful onlookers helped the Hardcore Legend to his feet, and actually began a "Foley" chant, which ended almost as soon as it started - and possibly sooner, according to an onlooker who adm<span class="text_exposed_show" style="display: inline;">itted to losing quite a bit of respect for Foley during the course of the incident.</span></span></div>
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<span style="color: #274e13;">We'll have more as this breaking story develops. But for now, it truly seems that Santa Claus has saved the day - Saturday - for his number one fan. Foley asked that we share the link to his "Saint Mick" t-shirt.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">I'm hoping the same will be said for Mr. Backlund. Let's keep it up!</span></div>
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<span style="color: red; font-family: inherit; font-size: x-large;"><b><u>UPDATE #2:</u></b></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">WWE and Mick Foley confirmed that the Hall of Fame has been restructured. EVERYONE will have their own time on the TV broadcast.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">And as a bonus, Booker T's big brother Stevie Ray is inducting the WCW alumni, making for a Harlem Heat reunion.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">I love a happy ending. ^_^</span></div>
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Koriander ~ Codename Sailor Earthhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01418462915907400047noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-354705414086327818.post-26524457415522363932013-03-08T19:44:00.001-06:002013-03-08T20:23:01.183-06:00Don't accept this from big business.<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgJ5_CuC2JmB2B1kpCBRLgK567wSvWl9ywQiqMxISzcYiD3wGiBgXfst9rXvmmzDbEmvQeoFPFH-zJo1kXouJ4l2drHapQT8EU-9WbfwwVgYw0Pf9dm69kI1eRzAIveGO87I-0sIFJJhotA/s1600/StuckUpHumanRelations.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><img border="0" height="271" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgJ5_CuC2JmB2B1kpCBRLgK567wSvWl9ywQiqMxISzcYiD3wGiBgXfst9rXvmmzDbEmvQeoFPFH-zJo1kXouJ4l2drHapQT8EU-9WbfwwVgYw0Pf9dm69kI1eRzAIveGO87I-0sIFJJhotA/s400/StuckUpHumanRelations.jpg" width="400" /></span></a><br />
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">Why do we allow this nonsense?</span><br />
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: inherit;">Why do we nod our heads and accept businesses toying with our right to work?</span><br />
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: inherit;">Why do we blindly accept, that while every job out there requires multiple degrees and years of servitude that is impossible to obtain, they in return don't even have to show us the common courtesy of a phone call?</span><br />
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: inherit;">You want me to give up my personal accounts, let you into my personal off-the-clock life, you want me to have extra degrees, extra experience, a lengthy resume ~ yet you don't want me to have had more than three jobs in my entire life, send in a cover letter and forward by Morgan Freeman, yet because you have money, I'm supposed to accept and even like that you don't have the balls to call me back and hire me?</span><br />
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: inherit;">No.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: inherit;">We wouldn't accept this out of our nation's children. So why accept it out of big business?</span><br />
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: inherit;">Here's a "job" listing I just got. I'll add <span style="color: blue;"><b>my notes in bold blue</b></span> as we go along:</span><br />
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span>
<div style="background-color: white; color: #222222;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;">AT&T Consultant - Professional Services 3 </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">AT&T - Chicago, IL (Greater Chicago Area) </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="background-color: white; color: #222222;">
<b><u><span style="font-family: inherit;">Job Description</span></u></b></div>
<div style="background-color: white; color: #222222;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="background-color: white; color: #222222;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;">AT&T Consulting Solutions</span></div>
<div style="background-color: white;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="color: #222222;">Microsoft Unified Communications Architect (</span><span style="color: blue;"><b>That's a buzz term meaning "Customer Service"</b></span><span style="color: #222222;"><b>.</b>)</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="background-color: white; color: #222222;">
<b><u><span style="font-family: inherit;">General Qualifications</span></u></b></div>
<div style="background-color: white; color: #222222;">
<b><u><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></u></b></div>
<div style="background-color: white; color: #222222;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;">A seasoned and strategic thought leader in large scale multi-vendor Unified Communications (UC) solutions. Require full life cycle architecture, design and deployment expertise.</span></div>
<div style="background-color: white; color: #222222;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="background-color: white; color: #222222;">
<b><u><span style="font-family: inherit;">Role Overview</span></u></b></div>
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<b><u><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></u></b></div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="color: #222222;"><span style="background-color: yellow;">Engage in key engagements</span><span style="background-color: white;"> (</span></span><span style="background-color: white; color: blue;"><b>Engage in engagements? As opposed to what, engaging in on engagements? Of serious? I'm supposed to accept a grammar error that BIG in the opening line, just because AT&T is a company? Bullshit!</b></span><span style="background-color: white; color: #222222;">) </span></span></div>
<div>
<span style="background-color: white;"><span style="color: #222222; font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div>
<span style="background-color: white; font-family: inherit;"><span style="color: #222222;">and lead teams in the delivery of AT&T Consulting UC service portfolio (</span><span style="color: blue;"><b>No period, or other way to end or otherwise convert the sentence. "Delivery of consulting" again means "Customer Service"</b></span><span style="color: #222222;">)</span></span></div>
<div>
<span style="background-color: white;"><span style="color: #222222; font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="background-color: white;"><span style="color: #222222;">Ability to manage and exceed client expectations for delivery (</span><span style="color: blue;"><b>Be here before we need you, do more than what we ask you to.</b></span><span style="color: #222222;">) including facilitated meetings, whiteboard sessions, presentations, deliverables</span> </span><span style="background-color: white; color: #222222;">and weekly communications with client and engagement managers on status and health of the projects. (</span><b><span style="background-color: white; color: blue;">Missing commas.</span><span style="background-color: white; color: #222222;"> </span><span style="background-color: white; color: blue;">More fancy buzzwords that mean "Show up to meetings" and "Customer service". A chimp can be trained to do the same thing.</span></b><span style="background-color: white; color: #222222;">)</span></span></div>
<div>
<span style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="background-color: white; color: #222222;">Strong business acumen and strategic customer interaction, including workshops and Strategy and Roadmap deliverables is key. (</span><span style="background-color: white; color: blue;"><b>Where do I start on the grammatical errors with this? "Road" and "Map" for starters are two different words.</b></span><span style="background-color: white; color: #222222;">)</span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="background-color: white;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="color: #222222;">Deliver and lead strategy, readiness (</span><span style="color: blue;"><b>deliver readiness? What is that? Deliver readiness, like "Hi ♥ I brought your desire to work today ~ it's cherry flavored!"</b></span><span style="color: #222222;">) and other assessments, architecture and complex multi-vendor integration services. (</span><span style="color: blue;"><b>I'm to deliver architecture? Ah don't we hire an architect for that?? That's like saying "I need you to deliver surgery!" Sorry, but I'm not a surgeon.</b></span><span style="color: #222222;">)</span></span></div>
<div style="background-color: white;">
<span style="color: #222222; font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="background-color: white;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="color: #222222;">Support Unified Communications Practice initiatives as a collaborative team. (</span><span style="color: blue;"><b>This is a SOLO application. You are not asking for a team, you are asking for ONE person only.</b></span><span style="color: #222222;">)</span></span></div>
<div style="background-color: white; color: #222222;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="background-color: white;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="color: #222222;">Foster the development of standardized templates and Knowledge Management artifacts (</span><span style="color: blue;"><b>Knowledge artifacts, apparently I am to develop ancient knowledge artifacts. Let that seep in a minute.</b></span><span style="color: #222222;">) </span></span></div>
<div style="background-color: white;">
<span style="color: #222222; font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="background-color: white;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="color: #222222;"> t</span><span style="color: #222222;">o improve field self-sufficiency. (</span><span style="color: blue;"><b>Now you want me to improve self sufficiency? Which is it? Are we a team or individual??</b></span><span style="color: #222222;">)</span></span></div>
<div style="background-color: white; color: #222222;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="background-color: white; color: #222222;">
<b><u><span style="font-family: inherit;">Education and Certifications</span></u></b></div>
<div style="background-color: white; color: #222222;">
<b><u><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></u></b></div>
<div style="background-color: white;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="color: #222222;">Hands-on experience in UC on large, complex, and multi-vendor environments. (</span><span style="color: blue;"><b>In person Customer Service.</b></span><span style="color: #222222;">)</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="background-color: yellow; color: #222222;">15+ years industry experience and 5 years experience in Microsoft Technologies Consulting.</span><span style="background-color: white;"><span style="color: #222222;">(</span><span style="color: blue;"><b>By this math, the applicant should be 35+ ~ but you know they really want someone fresh out of college.</b></span><span style="color: #222222;">)</span></span></span></div>
<div style="background-color: white;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="color: #222222;">Strategic IT Consulting experience. (</span><span style="color: blue;"><b>Customer service.</b></span><span style="color: #222222;">)</span></span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="background-color: yellow; color: #222222;">Bachelors Degree or Equivalent.</span><span style="background-color: white;"><span style="color: #222222;"> (</span><span style="color: blue;"><b>For customer service.</b></span><span style="color: #222222;">)</span></span></span></div>
<div style="background-color: white; color: #222222;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;">Industry certifications applicable to UC.</span></div>
<div style="background-color: white; color: #222222;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;">Microsoft UC Voice Specialization</span></div>
<div style="background-color: white; color: #222222;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;">Microsoft Certified Master and/or Microsoft Certified Architect (desired) </span></div>
<div style="background-color: white; color: #222222;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="background-color: white; color: #222222;">
<b><u><span style="font-family: inherit;">Business and Technical Skills</span></u></b></div>
<div style="background-color: white; color: #222222;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="background-color: white; color: #222222;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;">Microsoft OCS R2 and Lync 2010 architecture, design and deployment expertise</span></div>
<div style="background-color: white; color: #222222;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;">Participate in Voice Partner Program, TAP and other Microsoft Programs</span></div>
<div style="background-color: white; color: #222222;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;">OCS R2/Lync 2010 Architecture, Design and Integration experience</span></div>
<div style="background-color: white; color: #222222;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;">Multi-vendor integration with:</span></div>
<div style="background-color: white; color: #222222;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;">TDM to IP based voice solutions, including Cisco, Avaya, Siemens</span></div>
<div style="background-color: white; color: #222222;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;">Conferencing Solutions such as Tandberg and Polycom</span></div>
<div style="background-color: white; color: #222222;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;">Voice and messaging integration with Microsoft OCS and Lync</span></div>
<div style="background-color: white; color: #222222;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;">Unified Messaging experience with Microsoft, Avaya and Cisco solutions.</span></div>
<div style="background-color: white; color: #222222;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;">Deployment experience with media gateway including AudioCodes, Net Quintum and Dialogic</span></div>
<div style="background-color: white;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="color: #222222;">SIP Trunking (</span><span style="color: blue;"><b>That's alot of crap for customer service. 3 quarters of this you won't use while on the job, they just want you to have it.</b></span><span style="color: #222222;">)</span></span></div>
<div style="background-color: white; color: #222222;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;">Customer use case scenarios</span></div>
<div style="background-color: white; color: #222222;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;">Data center network re-engineering</span></div>
<div style="background-color: white; color: #222222;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;">Internet access engineering</span></div>
<div style="background-color: white; color: #222222;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;">WAN acceleration and content distribution</span></div>
<div style="background-color: white; color: #222222;">
<span style="background-color: yellow; font-family: inherit;">QoS, Multicast, IP traffic engineering (desired)</span></div>
<div style="background-color: white;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="color: #222222;">Outstanding written and verbal communications skills with experience in VP and CxO level interaction and facilitation of diverse groups and stakeholders. (</span><b><span style="color: blue;">Have good grammar, be polite and speak well.</span><span style="color: #222222;">)</span></b></span></div>
<div style="background-color: white;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="color: #222222;">Ability to travel up to 75%.<b> (</b></span><span style="color: blue; font-weight: bold;">You will spend 6 days a week on the road.</span><span style="color: #222222;">)</span></span></div>
<div style="background-color: white; color: #222222;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;">Distinguished interpersonal skills and responsiveness supporting customers <span style="background-color: transparent;">(</span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: blue;"><b>Have good grammar, be fast, polite and speak well.</b></span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: #222222;">)</span></span></div>
<div style="background-color: white;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="color: #222222;">Ability and wiliness to assist sales and field management in expanding and development of new business opportunities (</span><span style="color: blue;"><b>Be willing to do everyone else's job, plus yours.</b></span><span style="color: #222222;">)</span></span></div>
<div style="background-color: white; color: #222222;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="background-color: white; color: #222222;">
<b><u><span style="font-family: inherit;">Company Description</span></u></b></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="color: #222222;">The largest communications company in the United States. And the world. We are the industry leaders in providing wireless service, high speed internet access, local and long distance voice, and directory publishing and advertising services across the US. We are also developing our business to include next-generation television services with our new AT&T U-VerseSM TV. (</span><span style="color: blue;"><b>Any customer of AT&T can tell you this is utter bullshit.</b></span><span style="color: #222222;">)</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="background-color: white;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="color: #222222;">Join our incredibly diverse company of more than 250,000 people and help drive the innovation that keeps AT&T at the leading edge of technology and service. (</span><span style="color: blue;"><b>When a company says they are diverse, that means they have 3-5 Black people per building unit, and they outsource to Brazil, Malaysia and Taiwan.</b></span><span style="color: #222222;">)</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="color: #222222;">Expect big things from the company that created the communications industry. AT&T (</span><span style="color: blue;"><b>Expect it, but of course they won't deliver.</b></span><span style="color: #222222;">)</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="background-color: white; color: #222222;">
<b><u><span style="font-family: inherit;">Additional Information</span></u></b></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="background-color: white; color: #222222;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;">Posted: March 2, 2013 </span></div>
<div style="background-color: white; color: #222222;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;">Type: Full-time </span></div>
<div style="background-color: white; color: #222222;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;">Experience: Not Applicable </span></div>
<div style="background-color: white; color: #222222;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;">Functions: General Business, Business Development, Research </span></div>
<div style="background-color: white; color: #222222;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;">Industries: Information Technology and Services, Telecommunications, Wireless </span></div>
<div style="background-color: white; color: #222222;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;">Employer Job ID: 1232284</span></div>
<div style="background-color: white; color: #222222;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;">Job ID: 4518331</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="background-color: white;">
<span style="color: blue; font-family: inherit;"><b>Translation: We want 15+ years of experience, and for you to meet these requirements, but IF you do, we're gonna tell you you're "over-qualified" and then hire some kid in Brazil instead.</b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="background-color: white; color: #222222;">
<span style="color: black; font-family: inherit; font-size: small;">So they want you to meet all of these requirements, work above and beyond your job, work crazy hours, and yet they don't even have the manners to correct the grammar?</span></div>
<div style="background-color: white; color: #222222;">
<span style="color: black; font-family: inherit; font-size: small;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="background-color: white; color: #222222;">
<span style="color: black; font-family: inherit; font-size: small;">Lesson here, don't accept BS based on who has what money. We're Americans, let's act like it.</span></div>
Koriander ~ Codename Sailor Earthhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01418462915907400047noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-354705414086327818.post-7893105964365797552013-03-04T18:42:00.005-06:002013-03-04T18:44:37.547-06:00Nobody asks for abuse ~ you can't will someone to beat youI've been on radio shows off and on since 2009 or 2010 and while I try to do my best, there are times where you hear me being completely silent.<br />
<br />
There's two reasons for this. One is that I'm not always confident in my abilities as a host, and two ~ and more importantly ~ I like to listen to our guest's stories. I feel I can learn more from listening than I can from talking. I honestly do feel like a little kid again, not wanting the story to end.<br />
<br />
But today's guest really had me in a tight spot, and I want to apologize to anybody listening.<br />
<br />
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Ms. Maxwell as you can hear on the show, has no love lost for Tina Turner.<br />
<br />
Now to be very fair, I don't know very much about what all happened or who did what, but she said a few things that really bothered me, and went against her otherwise, seemingly positive, message.<br />
<br />
<br />
"<b>Tina Turner liked to be beaten</b>"<br />
<br />
O_O Um... <span style="font-size: x-large;">WHAT</span>??<br />
<br />
"<b>If you're REALLY a strong woman, you would never be beaten. If you're beaten, you're probably not that strong, and subconsciously you asked for it!</b>"<br />
<br />
As I tried to state on the show, I disagree.<br />
<br />
Now first and foremost, I do not believe in spousal abuse. I don't believe a woman should hit a man, nor should a man hit a woman.<br />
<br />
The only times this can be allowed are if the combatants are being paid to wrestle, box or participate in some other form of paid sport and competition, or if one person is fighting in self defense after the first blow has landed.<br />
<br />
Backstage before a show, does not ever fall into the category of acceptable violence.<br />
<br />
As for the notion that "if you're strong you can't be beaten" I beg to differ.<br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiTZWk4M_RvpJ_JnychxXToEMCxVnOchmPBo14up7WVkx3VIe-sSD1cBGEeT-yA8GMiQhJjTZ7TwJ9NhHi_wSTnDmm-F19DipVrFQZBIzFFGfmTaGGp4I1QKlB3z2PI_MIts0w4MzcYF_Dj/s1600/MomDaughterAndMe.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="258" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiTZWk4M_RvpJ_JnychxXToEMCxVnOchmPBo14up7WVkx3VIe-sSD1cBGEeT-yA8GMiQhJjTZ7TwJ9NhHi_wSTnDmm-F19DipVrFQZBIzFFGfmTaGGp4I1QKlB3z2PI_MIts0w4MzcYF_Dj/s320/MomDaughterAndMe.jpg" title="Oma, Mama when she was pregnant with my brother, tiny me." width="320" /></a></div>
My mother's mother is a very strong woman. She actually knows how to box and while not a veteran, does have moderate military training under her belt.<br />
<br />
Her second husband beat her.<br />
<br />
I sincerely doubt that quietly boiling carrots while preparing dinner would ever "subconsciously" call out to an assailant "please come beat me".<br />
<br />
My mom is a strong woman.<br />
<br />
The same asshole that beat her mom, beat her as well.<br />
<br />
I know for a fact that there is no child on this planet that uses brain waves or "energy" of any kind, to manipulate a drunk man into beating her unconscious while she's doing her homework.<br />
<br />
My mom's friend (for her safety, I'm re-naming her "Janet") was just honorably discharged from the Navy about a year ago. A fighter from the United States Navy, this woman has had gun and hand-to-hand training. She is literally G.I. Jane in a sailor suit.<br />
<br />
Janet just left an abusive relationship two weeks ago. Janet's boyfriend liked to take out his aggression about his lot in life on her, usually while she was minding her own business.<br />
<br />
My neighbor across the street was <a href="http://codenamesailorearth.blogspot.com/2012/08/domestic-meteor-shower.html" target="_blank">set on fire</a>, over $5 Wal*Mart jewelry that her ex-husband wanted to wear. It was the middle of the night, during a meteor shower. I'm fairly certain she wanted to enjoy the shooting stars before bed, rather than to deal with someone who she cared about, beating her.<br />
<br />
And I have met guys who were beaten by their girlfriends, usually over stupid things like television and time spent playing video games, or walking the dog instead of shopping with her. (Actual excuse.) It's a sad and sorry sight, to see a human being, reduced to tears and bruises, because someone else found fault with their daily habits.<br />
<br />
<b>The truth is that men and women can be very strong, both mentally and physically, and still get beaten by the people who are supposed to love them.</b><br />
<br />
It's not your fault, and you can't subconsciously "will" anybody to beat you. You have no control over your subconscious and scientifically speaking, the body is more apt to head into "fight or flight" mode subconsciously than it is to give off an "abuse me please" signal.<br />
<br />
<b>Bottom line, the human body is not capable of psychically asking another human being to attack it.</b><br />
<br />
So to anybody who chose to listen to the show with Holly Maxwell, I sincerely apologize if you felt offended by anything either she or I have said.Koriander ~ Codename Sailor Earthhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01418462915907400047noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-354705414086327818.post-42006291819730101602013-02-20T01:31:00.005-06:002013-02-20T01:44:39.624-06:00AT&T's Old House<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgfgbqcYdxgiZ_iUnvDO1Q8ao-p8lWW-zjmcxtcpZgwc-15x3x6RTsbeJDeUil8P0MSz2TOMhxImbPJjzR1GU04c_Pds7bFIc5mRTFzfRb4Z3qUdkviniOxkj1vaQLdHOTNj6CSY2bx7Ik0/s1600/511HcIsOD3L._SS350_.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgfgbqcYdxgiZ_iUnvDO1Q8ao-p8lWW-zjmcxtcpZgwc-15x3x6RTsbeJDeUil8P0MSz2TOMhxImbPJjzR1GU04c_Pds7bFIc5mRTFzfRb4Z3qUdkviniOxkj1vaQLdHOTNj6CSY2bx7Ik0/s400/511HcIsOD3L._SS350_.jpg" width="357" /></a></div>
← I might have been better off moving into my favorite <a href="http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B00AEIGHT6/ref=as_li_ss_tl?ie=UTF8&camp=1789&creative=390957&creativeASIN=B00AEIGHT6&linkCode=as2&tag=mosithunsitot-20" target="_blank" title="Amazon still sells it">Polly Pocket compact</a>.<br />
<br />
I still have my compact, which was found at random on the ground one sunny day in 1994.<br />
<br />
I couldn't believe my great fortune, I had wanted that compact since I first heard the PTA make a formal complaint about it. You see, the little blue see-saw has a secret. If you place a regular Polly Pocket on the see-saw with the Fairy Polly, and then teeter her really fast, the regular Polly will be launched into the air after 7-8 teeters, making Fairy Polly the owner of a cleverly disguised catapult.<br />
<br />
The PTA moms hated the toy, and accused Polly of being a murderous 7 year old, and a bad influence on the other kids.<br />
<br />
So naturally, I wanted this toy.<br />
<br />
But no store carried the little lavender compact, so imagine my surprise when not only did I find it lying on the ground, totally intact, but it came with a second, regular Polly, just the right size for launching. I'm happy to report that I still have the compact and both Pollys, despite hundreds of launchings.<br />
<br />
Why do I bring this story up? Because most of the places I've lived in ~ just like Polly ~ feel compact, full of holes and bursting with surprises.<br />
<br />
And just like "Regular" Polly, those "surprises" are not always fun for the surprise getter.<br />
<br />
Since the summer, my internet has done a fantastic job of cutting out on me. When it first happened, it took the phoneline with it. because just like dial-up, DSL goes through the phone. And the wireless service in my house goes through the DSL modem box... which goes through the phone. I keep getting the feeling that for as fast as we're running with technology here, we're still not going anywhere.<br />
<br />
So anyway, I had a few months where my landline crackled and popped. This led to oh I dunno, 100 phone calls to AT&T.<br />
<br />
"Go online, we have the solution there."<br />
<br />
... Gee um... if I don't have any internet... how exactly am I going to get to your website??<br />
<br />
This always led to plenty of dead-end conversations with people ~ who had English as probably a third language.<br />
<br />
"Yes I can see that you are having a problem. A problem is what you are having. We have established that you are having a problem. Thank you and have a good day."<br />
<br />
HAH????<br />
<br />
Now the phone was fixed for a while, but the internet was still popping in and out. So from the summer until yesterday, I had the internet cutting up left and right. This is inexcusable.<br />
<br />
Every time the weather gets slightly bad, it cuts out. If someone from AT&T climbs one of the poles and plays with it, the internet kicks on just fine ~ for three hours. Then it's out again.<br />
<br />
The wind blows ~ it cuts out.<br />
It rains ~ it cuts out.<br />
It snows ~ it cuts out.<br />
A dog sneezes ~ it cuts out.<br />
<br />
Then we started having a ton of suicidal squirrels. I don't know what their problem was, bust aside from drowning in my pool, they also kept gnawing on the line and shocking themselves to death. If you have no idea what this looks like, there's a ton of Squirrel Snuff films on YouTube, all of them with the same issue. Maybe they're coating the lines with licorice now. Who knows?<br />
<br />
So now we're in late February, and this is still going on.<br />
<br />
Monday, we get another tech guy to come over. Without even saying his name or badge number, he shoves his foot in the door.<br />
<br />
"Hi! I be from AT&T. I'm here to reset your password to match what I wrote down in my book."<br />
<br />
Suspicious much??<br />
<br />
Wow AT&T I have no idea what you're teaching your techs lately, but you should know that your dude just passed Creepy Guy 101 with flying colors.<br />
<br />
So Mama explains the problem, and sends the guy outside.<br />
<br />
Couple of hours later, he says he'll be back to replace a wire. But he swears we'll have internet for the night.<br />
<br />
... Not only did we have no such thing, he somehow managed to jack up my phone too. Perfect, now it sounds like I'm deep frying popcorn AND I can't stay online. Thanks for that. >_O<br />
<br />
So while the phone is crackling, Mama calls AT&T, letting them hear all the static on the line. And since the landline is dropping worse than a cell phone signal at a rave party for Boeing Airplanes, this turns into repeated calls to the conglomerate.<br />
<br />
From what little I can gather, apparently he never should have said he'd be back with a new wire ~ because that's not his job. His job is to troubleshoot internet, not mess with the wires. Great. You sent the wrong guy for the wrong job, and he's creepy too. Thanks for that.<br />
<br />
So yesterday afternoon, AT&T sends another truck out. This time, the dude goes in through the house, and searches the property.<br />
<br />
He comes back with a blackened cord. This is the phoneline, and it's older than my house. Here's a timeline.<br />
<br />
Starting in 1820, my city started putting in cords and attaching them to poles, insisting that they wanted the town to be ready for the "future". At some point, the phoneline was added.<br />
<br />
1915 my house was built around the cords, and the pre-existing phoneline was attached. Originally this was meant to be a farm house.<br />
<br />
Sometime after 1915 but before 1920, a tub and toilet were randomly added to a room that was intended to be either a closet or a tiny bedroom. The window was kept, despite it being directly on top of the tub. The tub and toilet were only added because someone thought it would be more "fancy" to have plumbing.<br />
<br />
Sometime during the 20's, a shower head was added, and then the room my bed is in.<br />
<br />
Sometime after the stock market crash of 1929, all hopes of this ever becoming a true farm were lost.<br />
<br />
At some point, an attic was kind-of built onto it. I say kinda because it's unfinished, and is actually one half of the master bedroom. You can't go in without a mask, because the floor is made of 6 beams of wood and a ton of lung slicing fiberglass, the latter of which was added when pink panther became a spokesman.<br />
<br />
After World War 2, the electrical sockets were modified. In case you're curious, the house still has it's outdated red and yellow stick-out wires. Yay.<br />
<br />
Then sometime in the late 90's, early 2000's, a drunk, dyslexic "handyman" named Danny bought the house from the little old lady who had lived here since birth.<br />
<br />
Shortly after purchase, he screwed up the floor tiles, put in new stairs ~ upside down and backwards, and then turned the light switches upside down. My house is full of NO/FFO switches.<br />
<br />
Then in 2003 a car slammed into the front of the house. A porch was added to cover up the damage.<br />
<br />
A year later a second car slammed into the porch, prompting Danny to build a replacement porch. It's enclosed and totally hollow on the bottom.<br />
<br />
Sometime after that, and I have no idea how this happened, he stripped the phoneline half-way, and then braided it (you read that right) with 3-4 other cords that are attached to... well nothing, actually.<br />
<br />
The cord was then placed near a newly built vent, where there used to be a coal shaft. And then he took a nail gun and blasted the house inside and out.<br />
<br />
I wish I had made that up, but sadly this is all true.<br />
<br />
So AT&T replaced the old cord, refusing to let us have the antique. (I'm searching eBay for it, that thing must be worth something.) And the internet stopped kicking out.....<br />
<br />
.... Until 5 hours ago.<br />
<br />
I need to move.Koriander ~ Codename Sailor Earthhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01418462915907400047noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-354705414086327818.post-78561715521929759492013-02-13T18:00:00.001-06:002013-02-13T18:00:48.606-06:00Thank you Tommy Dreamer. ^_^ An Ode to the man from Yonkers.<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg_aq5DQ4usu5uG_GHV_vu_61UlHHMigokAs_MfnTl3e212H4aoTWff3cSLTIBzCSHU9kiM8pZ-bf8BPqx6s28K3daLF8zZfqBp3c2_SxMyd74tOWL38CMsS2zo4Z1GQx7oNHb-TGV23-66/s1600/ChibiDreamer.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="353" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg_aq5DQ4usu5uG_GHV_vu_61UlHHMigokAs_MfnTl3e212H4aoTWff3cSLTIBzCSHU9kiM8pZ-bf8BPqx6s28K3daLF8zZfqBp3c2_SxMyd74tOWL38CMsS2zo4Z1GQx7oNHb-TGV23-66/s400/ChibiDreamer.jpg" width="400" /></a></div>
<i><span style="color: blue;"><b>NOTE:</b> I originally wrote this on March 2, 2010 on my MySpace account. I am re-uploading this with a brand new cartoon, because Tommy Dreamer is still an inspiration to me. The wrestler from Yonkers served as a beacon of light to me during my darkest hours as a child, and I want to share this story again, in honor of his birthday. ^_^</span></i><br />
<br />
<span style="font-size: small;">ECW to me growing up wasn't just another wrestling company. It was hope. It was comfort. It was an hour here, two hours there that made my whole little world a better place.<br /><br />Once upon a time, it was 1994. I was 7 years old and life was a daily nightmare.<br /><br />As you've read briefly before, my dad moved me all over the East Coast, in pursuit of one piss-ass retail goal after another. Just one measly year earlier, I was a happy Chicago girl, who lived close to family. But my dad was never happy in Chicagoland. Always wanted more. <br /><br />He worked retail for Lee-Wards, and in 1993, he was offered a choice. Stay in Chicago and be promoted next year, or move to Virginia and be promoted right now.<br /><br />He chose the latter, promising to move us back in a year. All the while, he refused to let me live down how expensive my brother and I were on him, how our clothes and our food put such a damper on the family budget, and that if we didn't exist, he wouldn't “have to” move the family out to Virginia. <br /><br />I didn't actually realize how much he was lying about our finances until I was 18, when I learned that a majority of the cost of living was NOT mine or my brother’s fault, but dad’s fault. Apparently he had been “entertaining” a string of other women behind Mama’s back, and had tried to pawn the financial guilt off onto Orion and I. Nice going there, pops!<br /><br />So I spent almost a year in the heavily military based Virginia Beach. My dad refused to let my mother homeschool me until I was 8, so I went to a school out in Virginia Beach, which was filled with kids that resented me. The children were jealous, because I was the only little girl, whose mother loved her enough to NOT force her into every after-school program in existence, and the only girl who had BOTH parents living with her full time. Everyone else had either one or both parents working on a base somewhere. I was also picked on and teased because I was the only mixed girl in class, and the smartest one.<br /><br />Not helping were my growth spurts. I was growing much faster than a normal child, and my mom had me tested for gigantism. My tests always came back negative, but I was growing at an alarming rate. (I reached my adult height at age 12. At 5’4 you wouldn’t guess that my nickname at school was “Gulliver”)<br /><br />So here it was, the early Spring of 1994 (I believe March). I was pulled aside by a teacher from a class I never went to, on my way to lunch. She pulled me into the teacher’s lounge, and poked fun at me, calling me a “freak” because I was a 7 year old, and almost her size.<br /><br />I cried all the way home. My mom sat me in front of the TV, handed me my favorite snack (Cheese sandwich with Maggi) and we watched wrestling together. <br /><br />Wrestling has a way of making everything better. Initially that day, I watched WCW, then WWF right after, and I saw other wrestlers like The Undertaker and Giant Gonzalez (El Gigante), dealing with the same criticism I had faced in school. Seeing them cope with being different, made me feel better.<br /><br />But later that week, I would stumble upon something amazing.<br /><br />I don’t remember what channel this was, or even what time it was, but on a fuzzy cable channel (which NEVER came in clearly) was an oddball wrestling program called ECW.<br /><br />Mama and I sat closer to the TV, until we saw the picture clear up some. <br /><br />There in the ring, stood Tommy Dreamer. <br /><br />Sort of lanky, with a small build frame, Dreamer looked more like the average business man next door than he did a wrestler. He wore suspenders, had somewhat of a pretty boy image when not in regular clothes, was poked fun at on a weekly basis, and at the time he was involved with a program against Jimmy Snuka ~ whom had rediscovered a love of the Indy scene.<br /><br />Dreamer had trouble taking out the more experienced Jimmy Snuka, but something about this underdog wrestler held my attention. I was actually upset to see the episode end, because now… I wanted more.<br /><br />While all <b><u>two</u></b> of my classmates who watched wrestling with their uncles were raving about Shawn Michaels’s impending match against Razor Ramon, I couldn't stop wondering what would become of this new wrestler from Yonkers, New York. I equally liked seeing Terry Funk, Sabu and Sandman, wrestlers who really didn't care what society thought of them, nor did they appreciate the rules and standards for wrestling of the day.<br /><br />I didn't really care that my classmates thought I was speaking another language when I talked about these other wrestlers. By now, I was getting used to being the outsider, and at least I could gloat that I knew where the hell Yonkers is on a map, while the other kids all thought that Yonkers was a brand of popcorn snack.<br /><br />It had been 9 months since I moved to Virginia by the time I had seen Dreamer. I thought that in just 3 months, I would at last be able to go home to Chicagoland. But life took an unplanned turn.<br /><br />My dad’s company got swallowed whole by Michael’s, and they opted to NOT honor dad’s previous agreement. So in lieu of the agreement to go home, Michaels gave my dad three options:<br /><br />A. Move to New Jersey<br />B. Move to Long Island<br />C. Move to Buffalo, New York<br />D. You are fired.<br /><br />Yeah. Riiiiight. Now at the time, Long Island was a no-go because there was an increase in crime there. I almost moved to Buffalo, but when my mom placed a down payment on a trailer out there, she was sent her money back, because we weren't the “right” people. I’m going to let you guess what that meant. Dad getting fired (again) was clearly not an option, so with heavy reluctance, we ventured to New Jersey.<br /><br />We made a trip out to Wayne, and from there Mama handed over a first month’s rent to a seedy person in upstate New Jersey. I thought we were moving to a really nice place up there. Gorgeous scenery, cute neighborhood, I didn't feel too bad about the house.<br /><br />Mama, Papa, Orion and I went back to Virginia to pack everything up. As Orion and I are waiving “bye-bye” to the truck with all my stuff on board, Mama gets a phone call. <br /><br />The check was being mailed back. Apparently the home owner changed her mind on that “weird Mexican looking lady” and her “odd children” moving into her pristine neighborhood. I didn't get it at first since Mama and I ARE NOT HISPANIC!!<br /><br />So everything was emergency thrown into storage, and we spent the next four months living in a hotel room.<br /><br />My dad and I fought over the TV, the better bed and the better blankets constantly. Not helping was his consistent flirting with the pool lady, or the endless stream of real estate agents, who NEVER freaking helped Mama, only sucked up more and more money.<br /><br />But late at night, dad would pass out, so Mama and I had rule over the remote. I got to watch ECW, and up in Jersey it came in CLEAR. <span style="font-family: Wingdings; mso-ascii-font-family: Arial; mso-bidi-font-family: Arial; mso-char-type: symbol; mso-hansi-font-family: Arial; mso-symbol-font-family: Wingdings;">J</span></span><br /><br /><span style="font-size: small;">This would be the year that I would decide once and for all that ALL wrestlers must be black, because ECW (and a few of the better WWF shows) only came on during black programming blocks. 1 and 2 in the morning, I had my choice between Miss Black USA, ECW and What’s Happening’ Now. <br />(An UBER militant show, with a dude who wore the biggest Afro I've ever seen.)<br /><br />I lived vicariously through Tommy Dreamer, who was still very much an underdog. Life just shit all over Dreamer, as he was thrown into fights with Stevie Richards, Hack Meyers and Rockin’ Rebel. But he fought through every obstacle imaginable. Watching Dreamer beat the odds every week, made me feel better. <br /><br />August came mercifully, as a sweet angel named Bea found us an apartment in Wharton. Almost two weeks after I moved in, came the match heard ‘round the world. August 13, 1994. ECW Hardcore Heaven<br /><br />Sandman and Tommy Dreamer locked up in a Singapore Cane Match. Sandman would go on to win the fight, but what happened after the match was what would change the world as I knew it. “<b><i>August 13, 1994--Hardcore Heaven: The Sandman defeated Tommy Dreamer by DQ in a "Singapore Cane</i></b>" match.” Is how some wrestling sites remember the night. But this was NO brief one liner incident.</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: small;">The next day, Mama was reading the newspaper. “</span><b><span style="font-size: 20pt; line-height: 115%;">Outlandish! Grotesque! Dangerous!</span></b><span style="font-size: small;">” Screamed the morning newscaster as I was eating my morning bowl of Malt-O-Meal Cocoa Roos. There were people on every channel discussing the fight on every news station, including CNN. “</span><b><span style="font-size: 16pt; line-height: 115%;">What about the </span></b><b><i><span style="font-size: 36pt; line-height: 115%;">CHILDREE~EEEN</span></i></b><b><span style="font-size: 36pt; line-height: 115%;"> </span></b><b><span style="font-size: 16pt; line-height: 115%;">who may have been watching this fight at home? They may fling their grandfather’s canes at each other, this is imitative behavior!!</span></b><span style="font-size: small;">” wailed an out of control analyst as she was waiving papers at a “concerned adult” in a black suit. People were aghast, there was screaming in the streets, schools were closed, busses rode on only half their wheels, riots were organized in front of public places. It was mass chaos everywhere I turned!!<br /><br />And all the while, my mother sat stone faced, reading the newspaper, when suddenly she leaned over and said “Oh look Princess! Tommy and Sandman’s fight made the paper. And LOOK they got such a nice shot of him, right as Sandman struck him the third time. Awwww. </span><span style="font-size: small;">♥”<br /><br />A few months passed by, and I was regretting the move to Jersey. Apperantly I was the only little girl in all of Wharton who loved Wrestling, Power Rangers, Cartoons, Anime, reading buuks wifout da purdy pitruez, and generally being good. I was the tallest girl in my class, the only mixed child in class, and I was correcting the teacher constantly ~ which is a lot more embarrassing than it sounds. <br /><br />Needless to say I got my ass beat every day.<br /><br />I suffered a concussion, deep spinal bruising, and nearly lost a kidney in one fight. I had a black eye and more bruises than I could count, and I spent more time in the nurse’s office than I did in class. <br /><br />Making matters worse, everytime I would go shopping with Mama, we would get harassed. There were <b><u>adults</u></b> ~ people old enough to know better ~ strangers I didn’t even know, ridiculing Mama because of the “more than size 6” frame she had at the time, and picking on me because of my height. We both got harassed because neither of us had a “Jersey” accent (one lady kept asking me if I was from Canada) and I even dealt with people questioning Orion, who as a baby had blonde curls and blue eyes and thus didn’t look like me. (Mixed kids change colors. FYI.) <br /><br />No matter where I went, I was treated less like a child and more like a monster. </span><span style="font-size: small;">So if there was ever a time that I needed an underdog hero to look to, this would have been it.<br /><br />Watching ECW during my “medically induced vacations” made the struggle seem less depressing. Raven and Dreamer were working a storyline that really shone a light on my life at the time.<br /><br />Raven portrayed the anger I had inside. Dressed like a grunge-era rebel, he voiced all of the hurt I had in me. How society was a failure, how he couldn’t find a place in the world, so he had to carve one out. How the mainstream world as we knew it had no love for misfits and outcasts. He dealt with all the same hatred I had, and he acted it all out.<br /><br />But across the ring was Tommy Dreamer. Even though Dreamer dealt with the exact same crap as Raven, he viewed the struggle as a challenge to overcome, not a reason to bemoan his fate. Every rejection from mainstream society was just one more hurdle to jump, one more reason to keep going. Dreamer’s message through his matches was that you could be a screw up, you could be an outcast, but you could still be somebody. If you were willing to fight for yourself, and anything you stand for, then you can become a champion.<br /><br />I sat wide-eyed, holding my Power Ranger plushies as they fought. I wasn’t just watching a well booked storyline, I was watching Raven and Dreamer give me something I desperately needed. A voice.<br /><br />Now somewhere along 94 and 95 came the crossing of the paths. This is where the story takes a surprising turn.<br /><br />Mama used to order from different pizza places in the tri-state area. One such place (though I can’t remember which) had an interesting pizza boy.<br /><br />This dude always came to the house EARLY with our food. He was never late and was very humble. Very polite, didn’t ask for a tip, always had his face covered with a baseball cap with the brim tipped down.<br /><br />Until one night….<br /><br />Mama had ordered pepperoni and mushroom and I think sausage. She barely had enough time to get the money ready when the guy showed up at the door, hot pizza in hand. So Mama went downstairs to the door, still counting change.<br /><br />Mama opened the door, got the pizza and handed the man some money. He tipped his hat and started counting. “Will that be all Ma’am?”<br /><br />Mama looked under the hat. “……….. Tommy? O_O Tommy….. Dreamer???”<br /><br />“Will that be all ma’am?”<br /><br />“You’re… Tommy Dreamer. You’re Tommy Dreamer!”<br /><br />“o///o;; …… </span><i><span style="font-size: 8pt; line-height: 115%;">*oh shit*</span></i><span style="font-size: small;"> Um will that be all ma’am?”<br /><br />“Didn’t you fight Sandman not too long ago?”<br /><br />I came downstairs, wondering why it was suddenly freezing, and eager to help Mama bring in the food.<br /><br />“Hey Mama! Didja need any-<b>OHMAHGOD IT’S TOMMY DREAMER</b>!!!” I stared up in awe as Tommy was trying not to act like this was a big deal.<br /><br />Orion came downstairs. He was still in diapers and didn’t really talk yet, but wanted to help out too. He grunted through his pacifier. “Mmm Hmm Mmm mmm !!!! *Shock* Mmmm Mmmm Emmm Heemmm????” (Translation: Do you need any-!!!! Tommy Dreamer???)<br /><br />As Orion and I freaked out, Tommy continued counting. Mama took a deep breath.<br /><br />“……. DUDE!! Awesome match.”<br /><br />Tommy smiled. “Thanks.” He soon darted off into the night. I don’t even think he had all of the money with him! (Free Pizza ish good.)<br /><br />A few years later, Dreamer confirmed that he really was a pizza boy back then on the “Rise and fall of ECW set”. ^_^ Who knew that the first wrestler I would meet came right to my door, and bearing good food on top of that!<br /><br />Summer of 1995, Mama was finally able to start homeschooling me. The ridicule at school was now over, but at home it was just starting up again. Dad and his branch of the family thought my mom was stupid for homeschooling me, claiming that I was now “guaranteed” to never make friends and to be a social outcast, because after all, school was there to make friends, and little more.</span><span style="font-size: 36pt; line-height: 115%;">REALLY??? :D</span><br /><span style="font-size: small;">I laugh at this memory, every time I think about the day I graduated high school a year ahead of my peers, while I was doing pre-collage work for the hell of it. I also laugh, because my cousins on my dad’s side only have two friends a piece, and can’t even maintain relationships with each other, much less their former schoolmates.<br /><br />But still, any time my dad’s family picked on me for ONCE AGAIN being the oddball, I took solace in knowing that there were other misfits right in ECW, who thumbed their noses at the “norms” of society.<br /><br />I would spend the next few years on the East Coast, with ECW being my saving grace. Certainly watching people being bludgeoned with barbed wire baseball bats took the edge off of my oncoming hormones, and it made life more tolerable after hour long arguments with my dad over schooling and chores. In May of 1996, I moved to Reading, Pennsylvania, into a W.A.S.P. infested country club. Oh way to go dad, you sure know how to pick great living areas. <b>NOT!!</b><br /><br />I had Neo Nazi’s down the block, and W.A.S.P. elderly living across from me. Oddly enough, the Neo Nazi’s never caused me any trouble. Their worst crime? Rollerblading and skateboarding at 2 in the morning. (Oh scary.) It was their <b><i>non</i></b>-Nazi parents I had to worry about.<br /><br />Their parents would hack into the cable on certain days of the week, because they didn't want ANYONE in their neighborhood watching “those” kinds of programs. So there was no more BET, no more Science channel, and almost nothing wrestling related.<br /><br />Oh… at this point I was jonesin’ for WCW. Oh yes it DID get this bad. <br /><br />I’m sorry, I like football, I like hockey, but no other sport cuts it for me than wrestling.<br /><br />Mama and I used to play different games with the TV set, so we could hack back wrestling. Mama even dug out the bunny ears, just so we could see Dreamer fight Justin Credible. <br /><br />PPV channels back then, did NOT go to a black screen the way they do now if you couldn't pay for something. Instead, they would let you hear the audio, but the picture would be scrambled. So if you jumped up and down hard enough, then left the remote TOTALLY alone for 20 minutes, you could get the PPV in sorta clear. So I dealt with the purple, green and static white scribbles and the blue and yellow skip patterns because dammit, Guilty as Charged was on, and I was NOT going to miss Tommy Dreamer and Justin Credible in a Stairway to Hell ladder match!<br /><br />1999 came, and that May I finally moved back to Chicagoland. But by this time, most of the family I had left behind and badly wanted to see again…. Died. At the time, the few relatives I had left who lived in Chicago full time were elderly. Much of them have since passed since I moved back, and they really didn’t remember me that well. The few who are still alive have all moved away, so I came home to an empty town pretty much.<br /><br />ECW was on TNN at the time, so I no longer had to worry about jumping up and down to get a picture in. But grasping ECW again just wasn't so easy.<br /><br />Unbeknownst to me, TNN had started screwing around on Paul Heyman’s boys by moving ECW all over the flippin’ place. Most nights I could catch ECW at 1 in the morning, but as 2000 rolled in, the tapings came in sporadically in my area. Soon it was 1:00 am, 1:34, 2:17, even 3:45 in the morning before I could see ECW again. (Me? Sleep? Why should I?)<br /><br />I really didn't know what was going on. Wrestling sites back then were such a joke, and rarely did they cover anything that wasn't WWF or WCW, and even then the “backstage news” was relegated to whatever storylines were on TV that week. So I didn't realize the problem, until a few ECW alumni started cropping up on Raw and Nitro.<br /><br />Paul Heyman delivered one of the most startling, and heart wrenching shoots I’d ever heard one night. I sat up straight and paid attention. (YouTube pulled the video. Sorry!!)</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: small;">I had to resist throwing up. I couldn't believe what I had just heard. It was unconscionable what TNN had done, and I hope Paul yelled “I TOLD YOU SO” at the Spike TV building the day WWE went crawling back to USA.<br /> <br />February 2001 came much too quickly. It had been a few weeks since I’d last seen an ECW taping and now I was beside myself, wondering what had happened. Monday came, the day after No Way Out, and my mom and I just held each other, sobbing as Paul Heyman walked to the announcer’s booth. We both knew that if Paul was here, then ECW was done.<br /><br />Over the next few months, I saw many of the ECW wrestlers make their way to WWF. “Blue chippers” I heard J.R. call them. “Now it’s their time to play with the big boys!” He said boldly to Paul Heyman, just before the Invasion angle started. I watched McMahon strip down all the greats in bizarre and stupid storylines. <br /><br />Raven (who used to be able to dress himself) was soon wearing gold man-skirts and tagging along with Terri as they picked on Perry Saturn’s emotions towards the ill-fated Moppy. The Dudley Boyz were now ripping each other apart because someone told them that Spike needs to break away from these bigger people. Lance Storm was barely able to keep a spot in WWF, and in under a year’s time would be seen on camera as a janitor. Justin Credible was deciding whether or not he liked holding hands with X-Pac, Taz was now spelled with two “Z’s” and was reduced to commentary status, Paul was stuck with J.R. behind the booth, and the icing on this cyanide cake was Stephanie McMahon-Helmsley-Levesque parading herself as the new “Princess” of ECW. <br /><br />Excuse me. I just had to resist the urge to jam ice cold razor blades into all of my finger and toenails at that last thought.<br /><br />For the next several years, I endured watching WWE make a mockery of the original ECW, and no harder did they try, then with Tommy Dreamer.<br /><br />Dreamer truly is the heart and soul of ECW. He fights for everything they stood for. Honor, courage, perseverance, determination, he put up with ridiculous storylines that most wrestlers would have quit over. *Ahem* Undertaker and the chewing tobacco. On top of the craptastic storylines and the de-push after de-push after de-push, came the ignorant poo flingers behind the desk. “Oh the underdog Tommy Dreamer just doesn't have the body for the championship.” “Oh Dreamer doesn't have the look, oh Dreamer doesn't have the size we need” what the hell was this, a wrestling-WAIT “Sport’s Entertainment” company, or a gigolo pen? (Right size, right look, HOW does that help a man beat the Undertaker?)<br /><br />WWE Confidential would show a less than glamorous background, when in one episode, cameras showed Bubba Ray Dudley, Spike and Tommy piling into a rental car too small for the Divas, just to make it to a WWE show on <b><i><u>their</u></i></b> own dime. The special showed the ECW alumni eating lettuce and carrot sticks backstage, cramming into teensy-tiny hotel rooms together, and trying to survive on LESS THAN $100 a week.<br /><br />This was not a storyline. This was WWE’s second “reality” show. And the reality I saw looked very painful.<br /><br />I never stopped watching. Never stopped reading the behind the scenes articles, such as the time Dreamer told a news agent that if Sabu was leaving WWE, that he would soon follow, because WWE’s version of December to <s>Disappoint</s> <s>Disaster</s> <s><u>Disgust the ECW Alumni</u></s> Dismember 9_9 went on to put a fowl taste in the mouths of the wrestlers who actually spent the gas money to show up early for work that day.<br /><br />WWE’s new version of ECW lasted an extra 3 years longer than I thought it would. Once it became apparent that Paul as not going to be in charge of the one hour weekly show, I knew the alumni were now easy pickings.<br /><br />One by one, the ECW originals were wished all the best in their future endeavors, until at last there was only Dreamer.<br /><br />Dreamer was allowed a short reign as ECW champion, shortly after threatening to quit. The next few months, he just bided his time, until he got tossed into a “win or retire” storyline, with a young, naive Zach Ryder.<br /><br />What could have been a classy “book this man into retirement” angle, turned into a nightmare for Zach. <br /><br />Yes, Zach won over Dreamer. Yes, Zach had now retired Dreamer from WWE. But now Zach has to endure wrestling in front of silent, no-pop crowds, until he either gets fired or can somehow overcome this. Zach got screwed by WWE’s booking team, who ignorantly thought that ousting the heart of ECW would prove beneficial to the young Ryder, who was already being punished enough with that silly assed outfit.<br /><br />Meanwhile, I don’t think Dreamer has ever been so happy.<br /><br />In the days following his release, Dreamer got himself a Twitter and bookings galore in the Indy world.<br /><br />January 23<sup>rd</sup>, I got to see Dreamer live again at DragonGate’s Fearless. I came in early enough to see Dreamer bringing his luggage into the Congress theater, and I even spotted him with Gabe during the early part of the show.<br /><br />Before I knew it, Jon Moxley was acting a fool in front of Jimmy Jacobs, and Dreamer came out to beat Moxley. <br /><br />The fight went into the crowd, so naturally I ran over with my camera. </span><span style="font-size: small;">Moxley’s body goes “FLADUMP” onto some chairs, just as I’m racing over. I didn't actually see Moxley as I was trying to get a good snapshot of Dreamer. <br /><br />Then as I go for another shot, Dreamer puts an arm over me and says “Don’t step on the body, okay sweetie?” <br /><br />So I look down. “Oh hey there IS a body here. Smiles!” So Dreamer returns to whompin’ the crap out of Moxley.<br /><br />The fight goes right over to my mom and brother. Orion holds up a folding chair, yelling “HIT HIM WITH THIS!!” Dreamer says “OKAY!!” <br /><br />*BAM*<br /><br />Moxley does the eyerolly thing.<br /><br />I don’t know if Dreamer recognized Mama as the lady who couldn't stop raving about his fight with Sandman, and I’m sure he wouldn't remember Orion and I, but it was cool to see him again. No longer is Dreamer the lanky, suspender wearing young boy I saw so many years ago. For now Dreamer is a broad shouldered legend, finally able to follow the wind and wrestle as himself.<br /><br />So since I’m not sure if I’ll have the chance to say this in person, I’d like to say this here.<br /><br />Dreamer, if you’re reading this, I want to say thanks.<br /><br />Thank you, for giving me one hell of a fight, every time you enter a ring.<br /><br />Thank you for giving my family memories they won’t forget.<br /><br />And most of all thank you, for giving a little misfit child somebody to believe in.</span>Koriander ~ Codename Sailor Earthhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01418462915907400047noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-354705414086327818.post-57605731113596719212013-02-12T20:05:00.003-06:002013-02-12T20:10:58.964-06:00Save Olympic Wrestling<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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776 B.C. in Olympia, Greece, The entity we now know as The Olympics began. The ones who started it wanted to not only honor their Gods and Goddesses, they also wanted to see who exactly was the best athlete in the world.<br />
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To both appease their Gods and to definitively decide who was the best in the world, they needed a sport that could act as a showcase for humanity's best points. A contest to show agility, smarts, speed and brute strength. Something that could captivate a restless crowd while still giving scholars something to muse over.<br />
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The prime choice of course, was wrestling. Albeit it took them until at least 706 B.C. to come up with such an obvious answer.<br />
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Wrestling began with humanity as a way to settle differences among cavemen, start and end wars, to hunt and was even used as a way to show the opposite sex the absolute best a combatant had to offer. As the Bible was being penned, it was still being used as a way to help attract mates. The stronger the wrestler was, the smarter he was in combat, the more attractive he seemed as a protector, mate and father. Without a doubt, the people behind the Olympics had chosen the best sport in the world to headline what was to become a history changing event.<br />
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While cavemen and early humans had grown comfy with the version of wrestling we have on television today (the kind that has you both grappling and using weapons on unsuspecting victims), in Greece, a freestyle form of grappling (that would evolve into Greco-Roman) was the in-thing of the day, and wound up being the focal point of the games.<br />
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Of course, wrestling has never been on the card without it's jealous naysayers. In Egypt by this point, they had already declared it "dying" or a "dead fad", having already had it as a pastime as early as 2400 B.C., but then again, nobody really paid those marks any attention, because those people were obsessed with spamming pyramid walls with cat memes.<br />
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Although, I can give them credit for inventing MoCap Wrestling:<br />
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Other detractors denounced this new form, heavy on mat grapples as an excuse to be seen lying with another man, but the Olympic committee denounced this notion as nonsense, and continued to have wrestling as a main attraction.<br />
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The Olympics continued on for several hundred years before being suppressed off and on, starting in the 300's B.C. Finally, in 1896, the games resumed like none of this ever happened, and with the exception of the games in 1900, wrestling has always been on the card, though in recent years, NBC has moved the televising of said sport to ungodly o'clock in the morning.<br />
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So considering the historical importance of wrestling to the Olympics, imagine my shock and utter disgust when it was announced today, that the Olympic committee wants to drop wrestling from their games.<br />
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... I'm sorry WHAT?<br />
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Rumored reasons give little credence to the proclamation. One rumor is that they want to start capping how many athletes can attend the games. Another states they feel wrestling is "too old" and can't connect with people in these times. But the #1 rumor is that they want to drop wrestling, because it's no longer "up to par" with the quality they want to have on these shows.<br />
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... Excuse me, quality?? Quality?? For real?? We are talking about the same committee who...<br />
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1. Allows coaches to starve teenage girls into near anorexia, stunting their growth and stopping them from finishing puberty, so their 4'7 frames can better fit the ever shrinking bars.<br />
2. Allows coaches to work underage athletes from 2 in the morning until nearly midnight, to train for competitions that require said athlete to perform acrobatic stunts off of a beam not even the same width as a VHS tape.<br />
3. Insists that gymnasts, ice skaters and swimmers wear skin-tight, revealing costumes in front of children.<br />
4. Actually thinks that Golf, an event that requires you to swing a club at a tiny, white ball, and then leisurely walk or ride a cart across a stretch of land, is more of a sport than wrestling ~ where you actually DO put your body on the line.<br />
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Who exactly are they to decide what quality is?<br />
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Reality check time.<br />
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If anything, the Olympics themselves are an outdated concept that is struggling to stay relevant. Even releasing a video game series based on it, starring Sonic and Mario has done absolutely nothing to make the Olympics seem worth the 2-3 weeks they bombard television.<br />
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With that said, they need wrestling.<br />
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Yes, wrestling is as old as our species is, perhaps even older, as scientists believe that dinosaurs used wrestling as a way to hunt for food. But it speaks to a human need we still have. The need to see who really is eligible to say he/she is the best in the world.<br />
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As humans, we crave the competition, the art, the drama, the graceful athleticism. Wrestling delivers these basic human needs and desires like no other sport can. Be it Pro, Greco, Technical, Lucha, Freestyle, Sumo, Turkish, Hardcore, Arial or any other kind you can think of, Wrestling is part of the human experience. And it is a crime to think for even an instant that there is no version of it that can still hold a relevance to humanity.<br />
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And Wrestling has a passion to it, rivaling that of such great pastimes as Baseball and American-style Football. When people think about the 1996 Olympiad, they don't remember the SNES game (I have it), who won that year's skeet shooting event (you shoot guns at a disc... that's NOT a sport, that's a HOBBY) or even who won the gold for track or swimming. They remember Kurt Angle, breaking his neck while wrestling in the memory of his mentor and murdered wrestler Dave Schultz, and still somehow, some way, being able to win the gold for the United States. A boyhood dream that could easily make a theater full of muscular, American men WEEP should it become a theatrical film, and yet this is what the Olympic committee wants to leave in the dust?<br />
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And just like wrestling itself, Kurt Angle has been passionate about that day, being one of the only Olympians to keep alive the glory and rich history of the games. While you have your Olympic committee approved and praised athletes like Bruce Jenner, openly ignoring the Olympics and using their medals simply as decoration or as something to propel them into crappy reality shows and as an excuse to bully and belittle their daughters, Kurt Angle holds his medals with pride, talks about the struggles the other Olympians faced to get anywhere near the things, and he never lets himself or anyone else forget that the games hold meaning. A wrestler, a pro wrestler does this. Most Olympians do not hold their history in the same honor.<br />
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The power wrestling has is so strong, TNA and WWE are rumored to be dropping their differences for a moment, just to see to it that the sport has a fighting chance this year, as the committee makes their final decision this May. Bitter rivals, on speaking terms, even if only temporarily, just to fix the damage an out of touch committee has done.<br />
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The committee has it all wrong. We need wrestling.<br />
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We can live without the Olympics.Koriander ~ Codename Sailor Earthhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01418462915907400047noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-354705414086327818.post-86533381864751922262013-02-12T03:30:00.001-06:002013-02-12T03:30:13.536-06:00A Toon Makers Arrest? Sailor Moon Mystery!<div style="text-align: center;">
November 17, 2012 I posted a blog filled with new details about the dreaded <a href="http://codenamesailorearth.blogspot.com/2012/11/in-search-of-toon-makers-release-sailor.html">Toon Makers Sailor Moon</a> pilot, that has dominated the nightmares of Sailormoon fans since 1994. If you want to know what Hell looks like, look no further than this video:</div>
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<embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/H3scSHk4h2g?hl=en_US&version=3&rel=0" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" width="420" height="315" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true"></embed></object></div>
At the time I wrote that article, hundreds of cels from the doomed project began flooding the internet, so I started keeping a log of them on <a href="http://www.moonsisters.org/">Moon Sisters</a>, devoting an entire section of the page to Toon Makers.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhv-HHscdHmJal6PR9rfzrVTErHMLJotyGcqmWbPeyKS6blp6Up5gLiUZnuLsNdkgYnwypk2EcGShlWq7hCt-jKMkLFvdPjftINsjd1JbM5cbpPsjrIbl71pqo4q9zsnQZb7L6xcky_PsOz/s1600/SailorShe-ra.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="226" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhv-HHscdHmJal6PR9rfzrVTErHMLJotyGcqmWbPeyKS6blp6Up5gLiUZnuLsNdkgYnwypk2EcGShlWq7hCt-jKMkLFvdPjftINsjd1JbM5cbpPsjrIbl71pqo4q9zsnQZb7L6xcky_PsOz/s320/SailorShe-ra.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
But the main thing that kept bothering me was simply... why? Why are all these cels coming out right now after all these years? Is this because Toei Animation is working on a new anime? Is this because the <a href="http://amzn.to/M5TDWl">manga</a> has become one of Amazon's top sellers? Is it because there's new merchandise or because it's retro? And why are all these cels being sold off with non-Toon Makers cartoons, such as The Simpsons, BraveStarr, She-Ra, He-Man and Darkstalkers? And why would Toon Makers take credit for several post 1994 cartoons that the company NEVER produced??<br />
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Well six hours ago, I found a few answers.<br />
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An eBay seller posted a new picture of a pencil sketch of what would have been Queen Beryl in the ugly and rightfully doomed Toon Makers pilot:<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiPZoeunswboOeX59Til7OM86_R9FHxgu5A0D4WMT_ZxRQLfr4rAXMeWQbKZNf25f-LeK-HzHh1pbIKS927eKOcdXQA7QMY_jq4NxC7977b5-N9FP0QqKafSU4-_tIWosF_Trkku-zC9C-4/s1600/29.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiPZoeunswboOeX59Til7OM86_R9FHxgu5A0D4WMT_ZxRQLfr4rAXMeWQbKZNf25f-LeK-HzHh1pbIKS927eKOcdXQA7QMY_jq4NxC7977b5-N9FP0QqKafSU4-_tIWosF_Trkku-zC9C-4/s320/29.JPG" width="320" /></a></div>
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Attached to her is a note from the seller, which is repeated for several of the other cels:</div>
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"<b>Sailor Moon Animation Toon Makers Fox Pilot Cel Art Drawing rough Saban Queen Beryl E. These come from a Folder that is titled Project Y and Toon Makers/Fox Animation was trying to make an Live Action/Animated version of Sailor Moon for the US Market, only a pilot was made. That makes this Drawing extremely rare. This Drawing has the notation A1 on the bottom right. </b></div>
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<b>These come from the collection of a supervising animation producer Raymond Iacovacci whom worked for DIC Star Com, Film Roman on the Simpsons, Warner Brothers on Rover Dangerfield Graz on Darkstalkers, TMS on Little Nemo, Toon Makers/Fox Sailor Moon Live Action/animated American series Pilot and Sunshine on Street Fighter 2.</b>"</div>
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Raymond Iacovacci is listed as a key member to Toon Makers. But until this moment, I knew absolutely nothing about him at all. So i decided to do a little snooping.</div>
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The first place i found with any kind of completed data on him was the Tampa Bay Times. Clearly proud to have someone of this level speaking to them, they ran a full article, that to this day provides much more in-depth and human information on him than his IMDB profile:<br /></div>
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"<span style="background-color: white; font-family: inherit;"><b><span style="color: #274e13; font-size: large;">Profile: Raymond Iacovacci</span></b></span></div>
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<span style="color: #274e13; font-family: inherit; font-size: small;">Director, producer, production manager, Tri-Dimensional Studios, Tampa</span></h3>
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<span style="color: #274e13; font-family: inherit;">By FRED WRIGHT<br />Published August 7, 2006</span></div>
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<strong><span style="color: #274e13; font-family: inherit;">CAREER HIGHLIGHTS</span></strong></div>
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<span style="color: #274e13; font-family: inherit;"><strong>2001-present:</strong> Animation supervisor, director, producer, production manager, Wildfire Inc., Manila, Philippines.</span></div>
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<span style="color: #274e13; font-family: inherit;"><strong>2004-2005:</strong> Production manager, Toon City, Manila. Worked on Fox and the Hound for Disney Studios. Also worked for Isaac Shepherd Productions in Los Angeles.</span></div>
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<span style="color: #274e13; font-family: inherit;"><strong>1990-present:</strong> Toon Makers Inc., Los Angeles, Manila and Seoul, South Korea. Director, producer, production manager, overseas supervisor.</span></div>
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<span style="color: #274e13; font-family: inherit;"><strong>1998-1999:</strong> RICH Entertain-ment, Seoul. Overseas animation supervisor, production manager, The King and I for Warner Brothers, The Scarecrow for Warner Bros., Trumpet of the Swan for Columbia TriStar.</span></div>
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<span style="color: #274e13; font-family: inherit;"><strong>1992-1994:</strong> Film Roman Inc., Los Angeles. Production manager, The Simpsons.</span></div>
<div style="background-color: white; line-height: 1.3em; margin-bottom: 12px;">
<span style="color: #274e13; font-family: inherit;"><strong>1990-1991:</strong> Hyperion Animation Co., Los Angeles. Studio production supervisor, Bebe's Kids for Paramount Pictures and Rover Dangerfield for Warner Bros.</span></div>
<div style="background-color: white; line-height: 1.3em; margin-bottom: 12px;">
<span style="color: #274e13; font-family: inherit;"><strong>1989-1990:</strong> TMS animation, Los Angeles. Office manager, production coordinator, Little Nemo.</span></div>
<div style="background-color: white; line-height: 1.3em; margin-bottom: 12px;">
<span style="color: #274e13; font-family: inherit;"><strong>1987-1989:</strong> DIC Animation City, Los Angeles. Production coordinator, Ghostbusters; Dennis the Menace; Hello, Kitty; Barbie and the Rockers; Heathcliff; and The Little Archies.</span></div>
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<span style="color: #274e13; font-family: inherit;"><strong>PREVIOUS POSITION:</strong> Writer, director, producer, Empire Motion Pictures, Manila, Philippines</span></div>
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<span style="color: #274e13; font-family: inherit;">Raymond Iacovacci has had a very animated life, and his love for animated motion pictures has taken him to exotic locations around the world. Now he's in Tampa, taking on a role as director, producer and production manager for the final series of half-hour episodes of an animated children's TV series.</span></div>
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<span style="color: #274e13; font-family: inherit;">His new duties at Tri-Dimensional Studios are focused on Story Teller Cafe, a series that will begin airing on the Christian Broadcasting Network in 2007, Iacovacci said.</span></div>
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<span style="color: #274e13; font-family: inherit;">"This TV series that we're doing seemed so valid to me," he said. "It's a children's series where toys come alive at night in a cafe ... and they act out Bible stories."</span></div>
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<span style="color: #274e13; font-family: inherit;">Iacovacci has worked on a number of popular animated films and TV shows, from Street Fighter to The Simpsons. He has lived in the Far East for most of his career since 1993, and he has a home in the Philippines.</span></div>
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<span style="color: #274e13; font-family: inherit;">The series has been plotted out in a series of scenes. Iacovacci has the job of overseeing the computer-generated animation at Tri-Dimensional.</span></div>
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<span style="color: #274e13; font-family: inherit;">"A half-hour episode can generally take six months, sometimes more," to animate, Iacovacci said, "depending on the complexity. Animation is departmental. The series has to flow down the departmental river, and it can only go so quickly with X amount of people."</span></div>
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<span style="color: #274e13; font-family: inherit;">Iacovacci has other projects at Tri-Dimensional and other clients for which he writes and produces animation. There can be five to 10 projects under way at a time, he said, and the studio also generates architectural renderings for clients.</span></div>
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<span style="color: #274e13; font-family: inherit;">"I've got my hands in every aspect of it," he said. "I oversee the team of artists. I make sure the work is up to snuff."</span></div>
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<span style="color: #274e13; font-family: inherit;">Born and raised in Syracuse, N.Y., Iacovacci said animation "has been a lifelong career. When I was a child, I wanted to get into television and animation. When I was a teenager, I moved to Hollywood and studied voiceovers. And then I just went ahead and got a job at an animation studio."</span></div>
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<span style="color: #274e13; font-family: inherit;">Iacovacci soon found himself learning the production skills required for animated films and TV episodes, working for production houses in the United States and overseas. "I wanted to supervise the animation," he said.</span></div>
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<span style="color: #274e13; font-family: inherit;">As a result, he worked on American films that used animation facilities in South Korea, the Philippines and other Far East countries. Many times, Iacovacci would work on more than one project in more than one studio.</span></div>
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<span style="color: #274e13; font-family: inherit;">Even though he lives most of the year in Tampa, Iacovacci said he is simultaneously involved in animation projects in Australia and the Philippines. His company, Empire Motion Pictures, is incorporated in Florida and he has offices in Manila, Los Angeles and Sydney. His company also has live-action projects.</span></div>
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<span style="color: #274e13; font-family: inherit;">"I see myself dividing my time 50-50, having a home in Tampa and retaining my home in Manila," he said. "The weather is real similar to Florida, a little more humid. When I came here, I was kind of relieved. It's cooler and more pleasant."</span></div>
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<span style="color: #274e13; font-family: inherit;">Iacovacci, 44, is single. In his spare time, he likes to visit garage sales for antiques from the 1930s and '40s, something hard to do in the Philippines, he said.</span></div>
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<span style="background-color: white; line-height: 1.3em;"><span style="color: #274e13; font-family: inherit;">"There are no garage sales in the Philippines," he said. "People tend to hang on to their belongings."</span></span>"</div>
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Wow, sounds like a fun story right? </div>
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Well I was still curious. This article is from 2006. What has he done lately? Has he moved onto feature films? CGI animations? Direct-to-DVD? Children's Books? Surely someone with this background must be in Hollywood, right?</div>
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Wrong.</div>
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Apparently in May of last year, he was arrested for battery. A <a href="http://florida.arrests.org/Arrests/Raymond_Iacovacci_8242474/">record</a> for him is available online. Initially, an internet rumor tied him to a girlfriend beating issue, but the report lists this as an issue between himself and another man. Arrests.org lists the incident as "Sealed or Expunged" with a note to the webmaster to remove the piece, but the notice was not posted until after Raymond Iacovacci argued with a stranger who commented on the arrest. (Why is there a comment board for arrest records?? This ain't YouTube!)</div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjIf0IH7s9kX9VZXorV0aKhKYsMaU6XYbLX6Mt5JQgwC0gaRW7IIaLgeaLFxCX6Bj9hNg1QB_-kAV7bTLFkDG_ihQdQ6dmsx8eiM-lJwEa0a47BZNpbpIalRsXFun_ajrscF7vByrDbrYMb/s1600/whocommentsonanarrestboard.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="257" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjIf0IH7s9kX9VZXorV0aKhKYsMaU6XYbLX6Mt5JQgwC0gaRW7IIaLgeaLFxCX6Bj9hNg1QB_-kAV7bTLFkDG_ihQdQ6dmsx8eiM-lJwEa0a47BZNpbpIalRsXFun_ajrscF7vByrDbrYMb/s400/whocommentsonanarrestboard.JPG" width="400" /></a></div>
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Now whether or not you believe him, this still means court costs either way.</div>
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Which means that during this time, plenty of things became public.</div>
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Which leads me to a little storage room in California.</div>
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For years, cels and other goods that Raymond Iacovacci stayed in a storage unit in California, virtually untouched. But last Fall, all of the items inside that unit became public. Since the sellers are all different people, it's highly unlikely that he's selling them all on his own, or they would be going for a far higher price.</div>
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It could mean either that he's allowed the unit to be sold off, or someone has repossessed and auctioned it all off. The TV show Storage Wars comes to mind.</div>
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Either way, this is a sad chapter in the sordid history of Toon Makers, and in American Animation on a whole.</div>
Koriander ~ Codename Sailor Earthhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01418462915907400047noreply@blogger.com1