Saturday, December 22, 2012

What if there was a happy wrestler?


Sometimes, I see posts from "people" (read: non-wrestlers) that puzzle me.

They piss all over guys who are happy with where they are in life (read: Not-in-WWE) and they call them horrible names like "stupid" and "retard" and then post loooooooong speeches about money and business ~ like they know better.

Blah blah money, blah blah bills blah blah business.

You'd think these guys were veteran wrestlers. They are not.

You'd never know this is all coming from the guy working at CVS, who never wrestled a day in his life, but took two seminars and then claims that he can't wrestle because of a mysterious "knee injury" that happened sometime in high school.... sometime before C.M. Punk was born.

They blather on and on about business, like they want to be the next Triple H... but they don't actually watch wrestling full time anymore.

They only go to 5 Indy shows a year.

They don't watch Raw or Impact.

They forget when SmackDown comes on but can't wait to tweet about how great Antonio has gotten (I'm sorry, but he'll always be Claudio to me) and then they tweet again about the last five matches he's had... that they NEVER SAW.

They insist that NXT quit running shows a year and a half ago.

They have no idea what a Saturday Slam is.

They don't even know that Ring of Honor is not only on television, but they stream the shows online on their website.

The last iPPV they saw had Bryan Danielson on it..... and it was live.

But... they claim to know "the business" better than the guy in the ring.

The wrestler.

You know, the guy who actually went to a real wrestling school, trains and works out 3-5 days a week and actually DOES wrestle for a living.

Yeah. They claim to know "the business" better than wrestlers.

They heckle the poor wrestler, calling him names, and claiming that until he goes to WWE to "earn the real money" he'll NEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEVER understand "da business".

They never think beyond the WWE, a company they don't even watch anymore, because they say "da business is dying... no wait... it died when Shane Douglas dropped da belt in a .... nooooo it died when hulk Hogan left AWA.... noooooooooooo it died when" you get the idea.

They never think about an alternative. So let me bring up a fantasy concept.

What if?

What if the wrestler is not stupid or retarded?

What if the wrestler is happy?

What if the wrestler was in WWE, but they made fun of him, never paid him what you imagine WWE claims they pay (get real, even HHH doesn't make a million a day) and he's happy wrestling someplace where he's treated like a human being?

What if he's pacing himself, and maybe does want to go to the WWE, but only when the time is right?

What if WWE rejected him, but he's still happy being at a smaller show?

What if he's happy being allowed to pick his own music and gimmick?

What if he's happy choosing his own ring gear, and doesn't need a "creative" team to pick for him?

What if he doesn't want to be on a bearskin rug with Vince McMahon? Let's be honest, if you go to Netflix, and watch the WWE specials where they have the pre-1998 matches on them, and you hear McMahon's commentary............ it's pretty weird! He calls Shawn Michaels and a few of the other fluffy blondes names like "sexy beast" even if that's not part of his gimmick. These younger wrestlers are in my age group. Trust me. It was creepy to hear at ages 6-10, it's even more creepy at ages 26-30.

What if he wants to go to TNA to hang out with Hulk Hogan?

What if he's still figuring out what he wants to do in life, and wrestling is a break from his boring 9-5 at the McDonald's?

What if he did everything you're supposed to do in life, went to college, got a degree, but all it gave him was mountains of debt, a crappy cubicle job, and wrestling gives him a way to express himself?

What if this is his dream?

What if this is his passion?

What if that smile behind the autograph booth is a genuine one, and not an I-am-being-paid-to-smile-and-pose-with-the-mark-who-won't-shut-the-holy-hell-up-about-the-so-called-business-right-after-telling-me-his-whole-life-story-against-my-will grimace?

What if he did not just travel 300+ miles out of his way, to hear a complete stranger working at the CVS tell him what a "stupid retard" he is, how he "doesn't get da business" and how "until he goes to WWE he'll never be anything" and how this stranger is adamant that "da business is dying"?

What if he just wants to wrestle tonight, and give the other people in the crowd what they paid to see ~ wrestling.

What if we were all just understanding of that?

What if we all treated this man in the ring like the hero he is, for defying the odds, defying the naysayers, and living his dream more bravely than the rest of us keyboard warriors?

What if we showed him the respect he's long since earned?

What if we cheered him if he's a face, or booed if he's a heel, and applauded either way for the effort he brought?

What if we stopped telling the guys about the business? They live it, we don't. Don't you think they know already?

What if we act like they do right now?

What if?

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